My dad found out about self harm scars... Help?
Okay so I have self harm scars nearly everywhere on my arms, we went to a lake last weekend me and my family, and we went boating with my cousins and aunts boat anyways my dad saw my scars and semi fresh cuts and asked me about them, I told him we would talk later, like 30 minutes later he texted me when we were still on the boat asking me questions about them, why did I do it, was he the cause, what was the problem, he told me to talk to my mom later that evening when just me and my mom were in the car, I chickend out because I didn't want to tell her. Once we got back home he told me that we were gonna have to talk about this soon. But see the problem is I don't want to talk to them about it. If I wanted to I would have by now. My parents are supportive of me in school and playing sports but they could care less about my problems. My mom quite smoking like 2 months ago and is very irritable. Every time I do something if I don't do it exactly right she goes off on this speech about how I'm not good at anything and that I would be better of sitting in my room doing nothing then trying to help. And it just makes me want to cry. So I go off to my room and start cutting. It's the way I have learned to cope. So I guess what I'm asking is how can I not have to talk to my parents about it. It's not like they care anyways.
My parents found out I self harm..?
This has happened to me a lot of times, i self harm too. There is no way to actually get out of it, you are just gunna have to face it, i know its horrible but you will have to soon anyway. The best thing is to tell the truth to your parents, and listen to them, its very awkward just stay strong though, please try and get help and stop self harming, it seems impossible but it is possible, if you carry on you'll end up like me full of scars everywhere and you wont be able to wear bikini's in summer or shirts, shorts, or crop tops, please try, i support you:) - Katie <3
Are most parents angry when they find out about self harm?
I’ve been a psych nurse with grad degrees for more than 25 years. I’ve had hundreds of cutters and SIB patients.Parents invariably—no matter how good or bad they were as parents—are completely frightened and freaked out. They can barely think straight. Most saw cutting, etc. as the NEXT step to suicide.After talking to and working with kids who used self-harm to cope, I understand enough about it to realize it rarely ended it suicide. Self-harm was inflicted to deal with anxieties and pain.So the first thing I’d tell them is no, they do not need to have their kid in a locked unit.I would give them some reading material about self-harm and why people did it, why they got “addicted” to it. That gave them something to stare at until the next visit.The parents lived in terror that every visit would be the last. However people can respond to terror, I saw the gamut.Before you take a dip with them, first:Have you been in therapy, gotten treatment for the feelings that made you cut to begin with? If no, I’d do that first.Have a least a few sessions with the therapist and your parents, who can prompt you to explain the cutting in your own words, and why you stopped.They may never be ready to see your scars, and they may choose not to. Allow them this.They will also be terrified they will lose you to suicide, and won’t be able to absorb any other thoughts for a while. Do everything you can to ease them through this step.Some people continue to deal with depression and stress by cutting and self-harm right into their 30’s and 40’s. Usually it tapers off by one’s 50’s.So be sure, absolutely sure, that you are learning other ways to deal with stress. Get validation from another person, not just yourself.No parent I’ve ever met was able to cope easily with cutting. It’s not much easier for the nurses and others who care for them. It’s not easy to watch a person you care for inflict pain upon themselves.You will always be seen differently by your parents, and it will be hard on them.So no, I would not advise a casual dip in the pool with them with scars visible some evening. Within seconds, it won’t be casual, no one will be swimming, and most likely, one or both parents will be sobbing.Get the therapy locked into place first.Good luck. And stop it. I’ve never met a grown up with sliced up arms and legs who could casually toss it off with “Oh I used to be a cutter.” No more, no matter what.
My parents yelled at me when they found out i ..?
i told someone i trusted, and they promised not to tell my parents. i have no suicidal thoughts, but the person told my parents. first he told my dad. he got really mad at me and started yelling at me. "we never did ANYTHING to you!!'' then he told my mom. she started crying and screaming at the same time. "why..why..WHY?! where the he|| did u get the idea to do that!? i dont understand!! why would u want to hurt yourself?!" then she started giving me the silent treatment. i stayed in my room crying for the rest of the day. the silent treatment lasted for about a week. it was awful. that made me want to cut even more. its been about 5 months since they found out and they only thought i did it once. they dont know i still cut every day. was it right for them to get all mad? i cant talk to them about anything anymore. and they wonder why. i just dont trust them what so ever. wat should i do? i want to tell a family friend, but do u think she will tell my parents any thing?