I cannot feed my kids. Seriously depressed...help?
Both me and my husband lost our jobs. Well me first, in December right around September, then my husband early this Janurary. It's been so hard for us because we do have 4 kids, and we used the money we had saved up for our new house which we bought last year. We thought our jobs were secure...I got a part time to help for christmas presents but they fired me because they said it was only seasonal. My kids never struggled before, us either. This is totally new for us. We cant pay our bills at all, we get employment but we use it for our house payment, groceries and other stuff. So they did turn off our lights and we use candles when it gets dark. My kids have adjusted to this but I havent, I feel like the worse mother in the world. How did I let this happen? is what I often cry and ask myself. My next employment check, I have to either pay the house note, cable bill, my daughter needs new shoes, buy groceries, and pay the phone bill. I am thinking about just letting the phone be shut off, my husband has to use his check to pay both of our car notes which I am getting rid of my car. I dont need it since I dont have a job anyway. Tonight was one of the worst nights yet, we didnt have enough to eat at all. I cooked what we had left and I let my children eat over myself and my husband so when he gets home he will probably go to bed hungry like myself. I dont what we are going to do tomorrow. They actually cut my food stamps off because they said we were getting two employment checks. Can they do that? I really need to read up about this some more because I've never been in this situation so its so overwhelming. I had suicidal thoughts tonight, about hurting myself. I feel like I CANT go on like this, even though my kids dont say anything about our situation, I can see it in their eyes. So my question is: does anyone know if I am eligible to get food stamps even though we get unemployment? I just need opinions about my situation. I also dont want my kids to hate me because I am a bad mother....