What do you think of my poem?
Stay Out of the Rain I woke up alone Under rain’s dome Thunder moaned Flashes, lights, stones Heavens fell upon me No revelation to see The way of the world can be Locked with a bent metal key The man of gold sings aloud The penny man not proud Funny where they are now Where insane men howl Exchanging extremes, say “Have a nice day, Stay out of the rain!”
What do you think about my poems?
im only in 7th grade and i know it might not be the best. honesty is much appreactited. For only god knows. Why seasons change. why love dies. why people act the way they do. for only god knows how words cannot be undone. how the human mind works. how easy it is to forgive. For only god knows. what eveyones here for. what lies people told. what happends when you die. for only god knows. when you will feel disapointment. when you will fail and when you will succede. for only god really knows. and. are you walking on some kind of red carpet? thats what it looks like. only you shouldent be so proud. for you are not a model, nor even colse to being a role model. all i wanted was a second chance. a second chance to show you how much i cared. a second chance. a second dance.
What do you think of my poem?
the devil inside when noone's their just beware of the darkness that hides inside it slowly creeps up as you loose controle you feal like the devil just took over your sole hammers swords bats and knifs these all can be used in a slautoring fight allyour friends become your enimies one bye one you stab slice beat and berry them as i drop to my feet drink this bottle of bleech and say good bye world this is the end of me
What do you think of my poem?
I think expression is great in any form. My one critique is that since you use rhyme and slant rhyme you should probably revise to make each line have the same amount of syllables. That will give it more rhythm. Alternatively you could keep the blank verse, but do not worry about the end of the lines rhyming. Those are my opinions though. It seems like a good portion of a longer poem. I encourage you to add a few more lines, perhaps 4, and roll with that if you want.
What do you think of my Poem?
Please feel free to critique. Be honest. Tell me what you feel or interpret. What u liked or didn't like? Is it good enough to get published? UNCHAINED In this cold, enormous world Plagued with madness and misery, I weave a little world of my own, And escape. Composed by Rishikaysh © 2006 Rishikaysh. ps: please also check out my other poems by clickling on my name.
What do you think of my poem?
I'm going to post this one more time, since I haven't gotten many answers :(. Thunder booms through the sky as the liquid relief drips down her arm... she drifts away from the rest of the world as she listens to the sounds of the storm. Lightning flashes through her window as the crimson pool grows... her arm begins to tremble; she releases the knife as her eyes begin to close. She knows what she must do, knows what must be done... the memories come flooding back, attacking her all at once. "Your useless, your pathetic!" the words ring in her head... words from her loved ones who seem to detest her instead. She cries those tears of blood, thinking what they say is the truth. There can't be a point to living if there is no one who truly loves you. The knife in her heart is twisted when they spit those acidic words... but it will soon be over, she will be released from this world. She will fade away; be erased from existence. Memories of her will soon disappear; the tears will dry off their faces. Rain will pound on the windows, thunder will crash through the sky... and she will leave silently... leave with no goodbye.
What do you think of my poem?
The Falcons Flight Far, far above the clouds Against the setting sun A falcon flies alone. Soaring in the wind I hear his lonely cry So sad must he be. Riding the silent wind The falcon flies alone. Reaching out with his wings Grasps the empty sky. Riding the silent wind Never can he rest. What is within his heart None can ever know. Lonely falcon in the empty sky. I walk along the deserted country roads Walking by my side You are always there. I feel your loneliness Lonely must you be. Crickets whispering In the grassy fields. You walk there by my side You walk the path with me But you never say a word Never do you speak. What is within his heart None can ever know. Here inside this heart That walks its path alone The sadness of one Who is always alone. feel free to make any changes. rate out of 5 please