What is it like to find out one of your parents cheated on your other parent?
In my case it happened when I was 13. My stay-at-home mom had shared her suspicions at some points with me, I thought her dramatic. I was a daddy’s girl, I didn’t think much of it then. My dad was a responsible man, he always seemed so focused in duty and family, I’d never suspected.One night they had a terrifying screaming match and then there was a very tense silence. Next thing I know my mom slammed their door open and came to my room to ask me to go and listen to something my father had to tell me. He confessed he had been unfaithful and apologized, I listened and then I told him to pack his thing and leave. Mom was histerical, crying so hard she fainted and my crying father had to pick her up and put her in bed. It was a disaster.Ultimately, she decided to tell him he could stay at the couch. She thought about the situation and decided to forgive him, with some conditions.The whole incident changed our family dynamics completely. Where my dad used to be in charge of important decisions, money and discipline, after all that my mom became the only authority.As for me, I initially was shocked about my perceived image of a ‘perfect family’ and ‘dutiful father’ being torn, then I got cold and angry, I spent years hell bent in giving him the cold shoulder as revenge and being my mom’s self proclaimed protector. Eventually, thanks to my mom’s efforts, I forgave him.As you asked about difference the age factor makes, in my case I was starting puberty, and the cheating thing resulted in changes to my character. It made me less naive, and rather realistic… I don’t expect much from people, and always foresee the worst possibilities of every situation as to not be too surprised. I guess it made me distrustful. As time passed I came to accept such things as cheating can’t be prevented, just as other people can’t be controlled. Even so, I don’t think I could forgive cheating.
Should I apologize to my mother? She always picks fights with my dad and plays the victim and I finally called her out on her bs?
I’m already married i have a life outside my parents home, but my sisters who still live at home with my parents always call and tell me there going at it again, when I was young and at home I would always make them apologize and help mend things, but only for a week or two. Today my mom was telling me the same thing as always “I made a comment to your dad about about a painting, and he ignored me” and out of nowhere he started telling me all these things, so I insulted him back” and now we are not speaking.” I know that he doesn’t insult her unless she does it first, she has such a short temper with everyone!! And I finally told her: “No mom you made a comment, he was probably on his phone, YOU insulted HIM, and he insulted you back!!! And now you wanna play victim” She got all desensive and told me I was picking sides and walked out of her own house to go grocery shopping “supposedly” I’m so done with these people I have other things to do with my life than to keep trying to fix them I’d rather them separate if they’re so unhappy But I feel bad because I just let her have it, but shese to old to change, she always plays victim and never accepts her wrong doing
Should i write an apology letter to my girlfriends parents for this?
I snuck over to my girlfriends house and her parents caught us because her mom happened to wake up in the middle of the night and check on her and she wasnt there (we were in the basement). her parents assume that we had sex and they grounded her from me for awhile. i feel really bad and i know i shouldnt have been over there. should i write a letter apologizing for everything? i know they will probably hate me but i feel like its the right thing to do although it wont change anything or make them like me more....... also, what else should i do to make them like me more? please, any responses are appreciated
What does it mean when someone ignores your apology?
Hmm.. So, let me tell you some possible reasons for why someone ignores your apologies :-They want you to feel guilty more and more. Now there can be two reasons for doing that :- a) They are really really hurt and just can't accept your apology so soon. b) They just want you to feel guilty as for their happiness.They were looking for a chance to maintain a distance from you and now as you're at fault, they've got a good excuse to be away from you.If this ignorance is from a short time only, then it's quite possible that it's just for teasing you.One last possible thing is they want to test what else you would do if they don't accept your apology.Now, if you can figure out the reason, it'll be very good. I would recommend that one should apologize once, twice, even thrice is ok. But if that person is “ignoring” your apologies, then it's time to stop. Stop apologizing. Enough is enough. You've also got self respect and it's above everything.I've seen people who has realized this very thing after a lot of struggle, pain and humiliation. And you know it's better to learn from others’mistakes. So, I'm repeating this for you :-You've your self respect and remember always.. it's above everything, no matter what.If a person doesn't look for your apologies, he/she neither deserve your apologies nor you. Don't waste your energy and time after someone who doesn't even care.Take care.ThanksVarnika
Doesn't this prove my parents don't love me?
Don't dare doing what Matthew said, that's just wrong.. extremely wrong. Look, if they don't love you they don't love you, I mean, think about it the way you think about a woman, if a woman doesn't love you and no matter what you do she doesn't change her mind.. do you get over her or do you continue trying until the rest of your life? It hurts to get over it and it might haunt you for the rest of your life, but most likely you forget about her and just go on with your life, now, I know your parents aren't just a woman you love, they're your parents, your makers.. but again, you can't force love into them. If they kept inviting you to their home to speak with you.. even after 7 years, all they want to do is apologize, that's pretty much what I am seeing, even if they did not say the words 'we're sorry', they did invite you just to tell you they did what they did because they wanted you to have a better life, to become a 'respected young adult', to have a great job and so on. I am pretty sure my parents don't love me either, almost every day they tell me they want me out of the house and as soon as I turn 18 they don't want to see my sorry *** here, I've been living with it for a long time and learned to embrace the fact they don't love me anymore.. if they ever did. Don't make a fake suicide note, they could get really shocked and bad things can happen, especially if they're old. I understand you decided to 'write them off your life' but, if you do decide you want them back in your life, the easiest way would be to slowly get your connection with them stronger and stronger, begin by stopping by their house just to see how they're doing and leave after a few minutes (unless they live really far and it takes too much to get there) then you could start inviting them to your home for a dinner and see their reaction, just get into their lives.. slowly. There is no reason for them to never forgive, I mean, what could you have done to be so bad? Drugs? Have a baby? All that is nothing and I know I'd forgive my children, I'd punish them but.. to stop loving them? Never. If you do try to get back in their lives, good luck with that.
I'm writing an apology letter to my dad, please read and tell me if it sounds okay?
Renee, I read your letter and as a father of 4 (only one daughter)... your letter brought me to tears. My daughter is only 9 and has been a very good little girl, but I can imagine myself in your father's place and it's heart-breaking. If I received your letter from my daughter, no matter the past, I would open my heart and my arms to welcome her back. I read the answers some of the others left, some were very hurtful, others were just plain mean. No one can expect you to be perfect and your father certainly doesn't. You will have times when you make mistakes. Learn to listen to your parents. Hear what they say and learn from the lifetime of experience they have. Love them. Love yourself. Let the past flow away like a river. May you have a blessed lifetime. If you'd like advice on this, you can write me - barryoffshore@yahoo.com
My teacher slapped my face but immediately apologized. should i still report her and to who?
so i live in maryland and so basically we got in an argument over a test that i shouldn’t have done so bad because she failed me and gave an A to my partner who cheated off ME and i told her i was telling my parents and she LOST it and SCREAMED SO LOUD and slapped me very hard on the face and i have a bruise. i was shocked and said nothing and she immediately apologized and begged me not to report her and she won’t slap me again and she even said she’d give me an A on everything if i don’t tell anybody