Bad childhood memories?
Childhood memories really have the biggest impact in our lives. I know of a person who, whenever he buys a new shirt, washes it over and over again so that it wouldn't look new, before wearing it. According to him, he does this because back when he was a little boy, he didn't want to be noticed much. One day, he wore a new pair of pants and a new shirt and soon everybody was complementing him. He clearly didn't like all the attention. He is like 60 years old already but he remembers it up to this very day. Maybe your experience had more impact on you because you were on your formative years when it happened. A child's formative years cast a long impression on their external facing judgments in the future. I remember on my 7th birthday, there was a magic show and the clown asked me to cut a rope. I couldn't use the scissors right, so he asked another kid to do the job. As a child I felt so embarrassed. It was a simple incident, but I guess it has turned me into some "perfectionist". I don't want anyone to bother me when I am doing something even if they just wanna help me. I want to do everything my way, and I want it to be perfect. Regarding your last question. not all siblings fight like that. But a lot do. One of my friends also has the same story. Her younger sister grabbed a knife to threaten her too. Luckily no one got hurt. Relax a bit! Take care!
Childlike demeanor on 23 y/o male with bad childhood?
I am dating a man who is 23 years old, but alot of the time acts like a 12 year old boy and is nearly incapable of doing anything for himself. He is emotionally immature, still looking for that "puppy love" most of us grow out of at his age. He is also very depressed and suffers from great anxiety. He had a bad chlidhood, his mom had his at 16 and she then became an alcoholic, and his mom also always told him his dad hated him and that he was a failure and incapable of doing anything right. He is an amazing person, and I think he is very strong, but he has very many issues. I was wondering if the childlike behavior around me, who is also 23 but who he calls very maternal and "mother-goose" is a coping mechanism? Is this common?
I think I suffer from Androphobia (fear of men)?
I'm 17 years old and I'm in high school. I have a fear of intimicy,relationships, men, and marriage. Because of this I never had a boyfriend in my life. Weird right? I've never even held hands with a boy or had a kiss. The thought of me marrying a man and having sons makes me scared. The thought of sex is more horrifying but I don't want to live old and die alone. I really wish that sex doesn't have to be part of a relationship and I REALLY wish I could find a nice man that I can be with forever WITHOUT sex. But obviously that is impossible. I think that the fact that I've seen domestic violence growing up and being the victim of sexual abuse for the majority of my childhood has deeply affected me. Please give some advice, Thank you for your time
What were your worst childhood fears?
When I was 4 , My biggest fear was losing my hand-grip of My Mother hands in a public place. Once I did loose, I searched her crying my lungs out, a moment later i was surprised to see everybody around crying and my class teacher was helplessly trying to stop everyone.That’s when i realised you need to step outside of your comfort zone.When i was 6, i feared being left alone. I was devastated to see myself alone outside a room.I can hear sound of people around but couldn’t see anyone around. That’s when my friend came and joined me.That was when i learned that to meet new people you need to get on the journey alone, you’ll meet some great people on your way.BTW we both were standing outside for our in-disciplinary action in the class.When I was 8, i feared this Man.He was Dr. Jekyll from the popular TV show shaktimaan which aired around that time. I literally used to hide behind my sister to save myself from his curse. He is the reason why i still find Grudge to be a very haunting movie.When i was 10, i feared falling from the bicycle. I wouldn’t sit on the cycle because of the fear of falling down. That was when Mr. Batman came to me and said this:Just kidding, My father slaps for acting like a kid and a total of 8 fall downs, made me learn to ride a bicycle.When i was 14 i feared of getting less than 90 in the exams.Results came out and i scored a magical 45 in maths. If you have also been in a situation like this, you’ll know how awesome it feels when you score 49 in the next exam. :PThat was when i realised dreaming and executing are two different things.When i was 18 i feared of going mad after a continuous series of failures.That was when i realised, “Gone mad is what they say, and sometimes Run mad, as if mad is a different direction, like west; as if mad is a different house you could step into, or a separate country entirely. But when you go mad you don't go any other place, you stay where you are. And somebody else comes in.”Now When i am 22, i fear of being left alone and fall apart.But i do realise, “Sometimes things have to fall apart to make way for better things, You can’t just skip ahead to where you think your life should be."
"We can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark, the real tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light." What does this quote from Plato mean? What does light refer to in this quote?
In my own opinion, what this quote means to me is that for a child to be afraid is a natural thing since they’re still innocent and does not know of the terror this world holds. But for men to be afraid of the light, is somewhat like a tragedy simply because as we grow up we learned what darkness holds and what is light capable of. To embrace darkness and fear light is because sometimes we spent too long in the darkness and we accepted it as a part of ourselves, acknowledge it as the half of our soul as human for we are made up of both darkness and light. We do not fear darkness anymore. We fear light because of the hope it brings. We’ve been in the darkness for too long that we learned to be practical. You may not agree with me but you see hope is a very cruel thing to feel. Destroy one’s hope and you’ll destroy almost his whole being. That’s what I fear in the light, others may call it false hope. You see darkness isn’t what we really fear. It is seeing what’s beneath the light, what’s in the light and what really is that light. Once you see it after embracing the darkness you can say that darkness isn’t so bad after all. Others may call it tragedy but I tell you it does not feel that way.
From a father's perspective, what is your biggest fear for your child? As well as a mother's biggest fear?
I have two kids, a Son 8 and Daughter 3. I want to get them to 18. I fear losing them. But we cannot not put our kids in cotton wool.I hate having to tell my kids off, Hate it. But if I don’t they will not learn about consequences to bad actions.I hate seeing my kids sad, especially when I can’t fix the problem.I hate them missing out, but I am not wealthy so I cannot give them everything.I want to see them happy, learn, and help them to become good adults.
Why do we put up with men who treat us bad and we know we deserve better?
There are many reasons why people stay, not one person is going through the same experience. Here are some of the reasons I stayed, when I should have left.The fear of unknown (this reason is huge and can cover so many aspects but the big ones for me were); not knowing what my future brings and if I'll be able to cope with it alone.The fear of abuse; worried that I would receive verbal and/or physical attacks if I attempted to leave.In an emotionally abusive relationship, believing what they say. So thinking that you CANT live without them.Staying together just for the sake of kids. This one is a bad one, I know, but it definitely came into the equation