There are a lot of bad memories haunting me. how can I go on with life without theses memories haunting me?
Well, going on without these things haunting you is possible. Like the old saying goes "What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us."-Oliver Wendell Holmes If you start to focus on what lies within you; being kind, helpful, fun loving, understanding, strong, positive and whatever else you may think you want to be, then the other things will fade away. You cant change what already happened, then focus on what you want to happen. You can't change people, there is no way. So change yourself, that is the one thing you have absolute control of. The mind is the one thing you have complete control of. Be what you want people to think of you when they've left you. Be what you want people to know you were, after your final sleep. Live like this and people will follow. They will see who you are and say "I want to be like that." Also try to look at every experience as a learning opportunity. I guess you learned that you don't like lies, torture, or bad talk. You learned who you don't want to be. Your a good person, just try to focus on what you want and not on what you don't. "Be the change you wish to see in the world." The reason I can speak so freely on this is because I have applied these things to my life, I do not take any credit for these ideas. Other things that might help are the book/movie The Secret by Rhonda Byrne, the movie Eternal Sunshine, Pursuit of happiness, Mad About You-if you want to laugh, ***7 habits of highly effective people by Stephan Covey, how to win friends and influence people by Dale Carnegie, and ***Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill. Look these up, these books are life changing. Hope this helps.
How to forget bad memories?
Recently I am passing through great crisis . Passing a horrible life . Most of the times of my day I think of my bad memories , I think about my enemies but it is not intentionally , I want to think positively , I want to think of my good memories , but I just can't , everything I think just turns into bad one . It really makes my life worse , I have no such friend to share my condition, How can find mental peace , how can I forget those bad memories?
How do i forget the past bad memories?
to move on you must first forgive the situation no matter how bad it may have been and no you never really forget but when you forgive, i mean really forgive the bad done to you it is then that you don't think much about it anymore and then you tend to be able to just move ahead in your life don't let the past take away your bright future just concentrate on what you need and want in life and trust me it works i am living proof of that. take and forgive the negative and replace it with positive just don't let it take over your life and you will see that i am right good luck and your in my prayers
How can I forget bad memories (literally)?
I don 't believe you can. I don't believe in magical answer to real life questions. Memories are part of who I am. They grow out of every kind of experience, and range from delightful to deadly and destructive. I find deliberately bringing them to mind and confronting them can bring resolution - which is what happens when the reason for the memories is dealt with. I have put a personal experience of exactly this at the end of this answer. Why is this a 'bad' memory? Are you laying all the blame on someone else? Or on yourself? Have you done something dumb which is hurting you, or someone else? Is their some aspect of the problem you won't face? Does it lie with you? Are you accepting some other persons view about this issue? Do you believe in yourself? Or do you believe that, if it went wrong, it must have been your fault? Face honestly your own role in whatever has caused the memories. Act, if action is necessary. Apologise, if that is needed. Confront if it is required - but CONFRONT THE ISSUE! Don't attack the person, and don't let them attack you. I recently resolved a long, very painful problem with my youngest daughter. We'd been very close - then, suddenly, there was a huge gap. We had no contact for many years, then graduallly began to meet occasionally. Finally, after twenty two years, during a conversation about something else, the issue emerged, quite by accident. We talked about it - and found we had each assumed the other wanted nothing more to do with me! We had wasted over 20 years and experienced a great deal of pain, by railing to act intelligently. I have to accept the bulk of the blame - I am her father; I am older, more experienced, supposedly wiser. If your problem rises out or relationships - face up to it in yourself, then go see the other person. Call ahead; say you're coming, and why. Go as far as YOU can: the other person cannot be forced. If the other person won't respond - YOU have done all YOU can do. It now only as issue for you if you hang on to it! It can't go away till you'ver done all you can to fix it. Do that - and let go! Bad memories are a serious issue, and need far more detail before any significant help can be offered. Just maybe, a small amount of aid can come from this. Kevin
How can you forget such a bad memory?
A few months ago, I once accidentally almost killed my cat. I was arguing with my parents at that time, and I was very angry and rush to leave the home immediately. She was following me around and I didn't know that she was already below my foot. I fell down because I was trying to avoid stepping her over. But then she was avoiding me fell down also, but I fell down right on top of her after she avoid me. I don't want to get into details of what happened next.....i'm not really comfortable. In conclusion, I took her to the vet where she told me that she won't live any longer. About a day after, she died. And I still have this terrible guilt about what happened. If only I hadn't been so angry at that time, I probably won't rush to the door and fell down, and if only I didn't let her following me, she might have survived. How can you forget such bad memory? I felt like a murderer.
Memories are merely recollections. When the recollection brings a smile to your face you call them good memories and when they evoke any negative emotion in you , it is called as a bad memory.This distinction between good and bad is one that we make in our head basis our emotional state that is entwined with such recollection. Thus the ability to classify anything as good or bad is merely a figment or product of our head that has arisen due to our belief systems, social and societal conditioning etc.In absolute terms there is no such thing as good or bad as they are merely projections of our mind or perceptions.For example there is a popular saying that one man’s nectar is another's poison. The thing that is poison for one and nectar for another remains the same. That thing does not change its qualities or attributes based on the person, it is the person’s attribute that changes the way the thing is being perceived by him.Therefore you have classified certain memories of your past as bad. The only way to get rid of them is to accept them. Accept those memories for what they are and for what they are worth.When you accept those chain of events ( associated with the bad memory) you lose the recollection ability and it ceases to be a memory in your head. For now it is reality that has happened to you. You may have felt/ be still feeling wronged by such reality. But upon truly accepting it as part of your collective experience and being optimistic and learning from it, you are effectively negating those bad memories.Peace!
See every person lives in three cycles…present, past, future. All three are interconnected. I think present is the link between past and future. Nobody is there who has no past memories some good or bad. Depending the situation which measures lot in particular life but ya if any person says ki I live only present just forget my past then it's not possible. It's our part of life but to make it our full life just spoiling our next two stages.. So keep your mind fix ki it's just a part not a whole life. Past is already gone either with bad or good memories credited to our memories it's our destiny.You have to survive by maintaining balance with your all stages. It's your choice bcz you know better what your mind says or in which your mind wants to involve the most.Take your time to search to identify yourself. What's your favorite hobbies just list them out. Never try to anyone or allow anyone to poke in your life bcz Noone can arrange the spreading pieces of your life better than you.Make busy yourself with creative work. Set your mind and heart in creating your world not spoiling your future.Try and hope you will soon get rid of all your problems. Good luck