What is the most striking instance of “what goes around comes around” that you have seen?
It's so true so don't sit back crying over someone who broke your heart because it will come back to them. I remember back when I was just 19 and this 39 year old married man chased after for me for so long that I finally gave in. It went on for about 2 months and while we were messing around, he found out that his wife was messing around on him too. That didn't sit very well with him and he ended up beating her and she left him. I dumped him too because it was only a fling for me and nothing serious. After I dumped him he begged his wife to come back and they got back together without her ever finding out about what he and I had done.....Well, years later, I got married and found out my own husband was having an affair and that the girl thought she was pregnant. It was the most devastating thing that has ever happened to me in my life.The weirdest thing is while I was going thru my heartache, I had a flashback about the wife that I had betrayed many years before.I believe that no matter if you get caught or not, you still have to answer for what you do to others and it's always 10 times worse..Before you do something unkind or decietful you have to ask yourself.. Is it worth it? Can I handle what comes back to me? Has anyone else had a similar experience?
What are some methods for preventing pregnancy?
Either by using reliable birth control, or not having sex whereby the male penetrates the female vagina with his penis. Since you question implies you plan on having sex, look for a suitable birth control method. Know that typical use ≠ ideal use, e.g. the pill in perfect use only fails in 0.3% while in typical use it fails in 8%(!), likewise with male condoms: perfect use 2% failure, typical use 15% (!) failure.This website points you to a lot of links you may want to read Birth Control (Contraception): Resource Overview, here is another overview Birth Control Methods - Birth Control OptionsThis is an overview of the reliability of the best known birth control methods:The present day low estrogen hormonal contraceptive pill needs to be taken at the same time every day, before the hormonal levels goes down too low thus permitting an ovulation to take place. This to many especially younger women can be a problem. There also are reports of failures after having been combined with antibiotics.Male condom failure usually is because the male not immediately withdrawing after ejaculation followed by the shrinking of the penis, so sperm will leak out of the condom into the vagina thus causing pregnancy.In women <21 yo it has been shown that the pill, patch, ring PPR are not very reliable, while long acting reversible contraceptives LARC being the IUD, progestagen depot injections and hormonal implants are very, very reliable, for young and old alike, see Effectiveness of Long-Acting Reversible Contraception — NEJM
What does it feel like to have lost something precious?
When I was born my daddy gave me a pink rabbit. I remember everything about it. It even had a pink bow around its neck. Three years later he passed away from cancer. I clung to that teddy because it was the only object I had left of him. Seven years later, age ten, I went to Summer Camp. Still regret it to this day for bringing it. It was the last day and I packed my bag, asking myself if I should pack it already or sleep one more night with it. I chose the latter, biggest mistake ever. I forgot it and when I came home my stepfather was like "where is the pink teddy?" Then he started laughing when I realised I lost it. (He was an abusive asshole, thank god he's out of my life now.) I had panic attacks weeks on end after that, couldn't sleep properly and always rememberd the words my mom uttered a few years prior; "Never lose it." Yes it was a drastic reaction, but that bunny meant everything to me. A few months later my roomate from camp wrote me an email. She was 14 at the time, hence the email writing. She wrote; "Hey. You forgot your teddy. I remember you telling me how much it means to you and packed it in with my stuff. I would love to send it back to you. Just pop in your adress and I'll send it back to you." (She lived states away so my mom and I couldn't pick it up.) I was beyond thrilled. Cried from joy and had a huge weight lifted from my chest. My mom immediatly responded. I waited. And I waited. And it never showed up. When it reached the month mark, I knew it would never come. (We even thought of just going to her, my mom didnt care how far away it was at that point, we just really wanted to get it. The girl never responded on our attempts to get her adress.) I became sad about it again and don't remember what I did after that. Now six years later, I still miss it like crazy. I forget about it 99% of the time, but today was that 1% where I remembered it again. I even cried writing this, but it defenitly made me feel better. I don't even know what triggered the memory. Anyway, I want to thank anybody who read this and for anybody who just lost an item that was precious to them, a big warm virtual hug from me :)
What should I do if my wife is pregnant and doesn't want our child? She's 26 and graduating medical school next month. Before getting married she said she didn't want children. I told her I was fine with them or without them. She wants an abortion.
I've been in your exact position - wife in a medical career path who initially didn't want kids because she was very driven. To answer your question, there is technically and legally nothing you can do. That is the nature of things - the woman has total control of her body and you really have only one option - to be emotionally supportive. You think you have rights over that pregnancy? No you don't. While the woman has every right to abort the child, the man also has the right to walk away and not provide for the child.If you continue to pressure her to keep the kids, it could easily tear you apart for the rest of your lives. If she aborts the baby, that also could easily tear you apart for the rest of your lives. In my case, my wife didn't want kids. She got pregnant, had the baby and everything turned around. Her opinion about kids, all of it. She loves the kids to pieces. I can't promise that will happen with your wife - I have no way of knowing. I see a lot of people passing judgement and I don't think that is fair. Your moral beliefs in the matter shouldn't enter into the discussion. The question wasn't about right and wrong. It wasn't even about agreements having to do with the marriage. The reality is here and now. You want the baby and she doesn't. If she didn't want a baby, she should have gotten sterilized.You didn't mention timing. In my case, we had kids once my wife was already accepted into residency programs. In this case, as in all jobs in the US, the residency program must grant her a leave of absence as per the law. Maybe the answer is to simply keep up the career aspirations as if the pregnancy never happened. So she has a baby - take a month off and get back to work! Sure, you'll have a child care issue to work out, but maybe that's better than taking a year or two off.I think there is a technical solution which has recently been making the news, and which makes sense for career minded women. That is - the freezing of eggs. This makes sense because it allows a woman to pursue her career through her 20s and 30s and still have the option to have a kid using a very healthy egg. Maybe this could be an option the two of you would consider. It would alleviate the timing issue and let you decide at a later time.Anyway, you should simply be emotionally supportive either way and ease up on the pressure.