Does threatening to hurt your child illegal?
this is emotional abuse and is WRONG it counts as abuse.. there's a difference between 'wait till i get you home young man' and what you have listen.. i suggest you phone child line which is 0800111111 if i remember correctly.. or you could speak to Bernardos (http://www.barnardos.org.uk/) if you don't want this call to appear on a bill they offer an email service.. i hope this helps. but plz plz plz plz plz plz do something about it.. physical abuse is the same as mental abuse.. you just cant see the scars or mental abuse.. so know one notices..
What Can We Do About His Daughter? She is hurting his feelings and she just turned FOUR!?
My boyfriend's daughter just turned four. He and his ex were separated since Feb of 2007 and got divorced Feb 2008. His girl has been in the routine of back and forthing during the week so this is no new thing for her. She usually comes weekends now, coming on Fri and leaving Sun evening. It is Saturday.. Here is the problem-- every time it's time for her to go to bed she gets a pissy little attitude and starts saying she misses mommmmmmmyyyy and wants to go hoooooooo-ooommmee... and my bf gets this heart broken look on his face---i Love her DEARLY but it makes me SO angry! She is too young to know how to hurt him like that! And she gets a sly little look on her face, she knows she is only doing it to get her way....which she usually does, he will bribe her with staying up late or playing something with her, and sometimes she says she changes her mind, and sometimes it takes him getting her into the car and driving down the street before she "decides" (oooh I am fuming!) to stay...but this time, her mother called right at the moment she threw her little fit, and now her mother is coming to get her! Of course, now my bf and her are playing barbie, and this woman is driving a half hour to get here, and Im sure his little girl will cry she doesnt want to go---or she will leave happily, i am not sure, but i am left to clean up the emotional heart break..and i dont think i can do a very good job..my question is, i guess how do i stop this behavior
My 2 year old says her vagina hurts.?
my 2 year old says her vagina hurts (she calls it her butt). She will just radomly run to me and say she needs lotion on her butt...butt cream. She has only complained once of it hurting when she pees, any other time it was fine she said it didnt hurt. When i looked at it its not red or rashed around it but when you open her "lips" its red and looks irritated. She barely ever runs around naked and she still uses she same soap she always has. she takes a bath everyday and i make sure i get all of the soap out, she is not abused in any way. I have tried wet wash clothes, desitine, fan, amd laying on a cold wet towel. I dont know if it is a UTI or just irritated from not being wiped right or something. I feel so bad for her, she hates the doctor and medicine and juice so i need all the help i can get! thanks!
My child says he wants to die????
i have three children one girl and two boys and quite often they tell me that they hate this or that or that lifess not good but never has any of them told me that they want to die.ther ages are 12 8 7 .I think that it might be a giid idea that you get your child some help there may be an underlining issue that is making your child feel this way..perhaps some thing at school..who knows..but a professional will be able to help your child and find out what is wrong. It could simply be that you child has a fantasy about heaven but given the fact that your child said she was going to get some thing like a sharp knife then i think that there is much more to this than a simple fantasy about heaven being such a great place. I dont think that you child is saying this to get attention..as you have said she has come in happy and singing. The fact that he thinks that she wants to use a knife is rather concering and i personally if i were you get her some professional help asap.good luck to you and your daughter
How to keep my mentally unstable Mother away from my child?
I had a very abusive mother and had to cut all contact with her for my and my families sake. Change your phone number. If she has your email address, then block her emails or change your address. If you live close by, and can move, do so. Last time I moved, I did not let any of my (older members of mothers family) family have my new address, I had to do this, as she'd use them by proxy to discover what I was doing and where I was. Have a solicitor write her a letter, telling her to keep away from you and have no contact with you at all or you will have her charged with harassment. DOCUMENT EVERYTHING!!!! every thing she does, says, write out all that she has done to you and if you fear for your safety talk to the police, so that if she tries anything in future, they will already have her details listed.. Get an RO. Do not let her near your son. No matter how kind she seems to him, if she has been this bad to you and is this unstable, then she could be a bad influence to him and even in the years ahead turn him against you. If she abused YOU, that is enough reason to keep your son away from her. The fact that she is mental unstable is enough reason too. NEVER leave them alone together. Can I suggest you look up Narcissistic Personality Disorder or other borderline disorders...you maybe just understand what or who you mother is better, IF it fits. Seek counseling. I also was terrified of my mother until my late 30's, after counselling, I was able to see her, for what she is better and protect myself...even to find out, just who I am. Good luck.
How do I forgive my mother for hurting me repeatedly, when she doesn't think it was wrong? I broke off contact, but I crave a relationship with her.
This question is very timely for me right now.Two days ago, I spoke with my mother on the phone after almost three years of no contact.She was physically abusive during my childhood and mentally and emotionally abusive throughout my adult years.There’s an example in Kittie Eubank's answer to What's the worst thing your parent has ever said to you?In 2013 I decided enough was enough, and I cut her off.There is no room in this life I have created for someone who only sows negativity and hurt.She tried to contact me a few times over the years and I blocked her. That didn’t stop her from showing up in my dreams, though.I knew that being estranged from me was very painful for her. She doesn’t understand it at all; she thought we were close.Even though before I cut off contact I tried several times to talk to her about specific instances of abuse, she never could see that she did anything wrong.It was always my fault - I was being selfish. I took it wrong. She did it for my own good.So why did I call her two days ago?She texted me, about a week before that. She said she was sorry for everything she ever did to hurt me.There was no guilt-tripping or finger-pointing. Just an apology and a request to reestablish a relationship.After much thought and seeking counsel from people I trust, I decided to reach out and give her another chance.I have firm boundaries in place, and if she crosses them I am prepared to break off contact permanently.But if she is in a place now where she can be a part of my life, I will accept that.It will never be the same. I don’t think I can ever trust her. I don’t look forward to speaking to her again. She will never understand the harm she did.I called her for her, not for me. But that’s okay.So for you, OP, I would say….You can forgive your mother by letting go of the active resentment for what she did to you.Holding onto unforgiveness only hurts you - it doesn’t affect her at all.However, even after you have forgiven, you must be careful to guard your heart. Don’t let her into your life if she brings more negative than positive.It is hard. We want to have mothers who love and support us. Sometimes, though, they are incapable of doing that.Surround yourself with people who bring you joy, who lift you up and love you.Forgive your mother because it will release that tight ball of resentment writhing in your gut - you don’t need that.
Anyone have a problem with their 3 year old daughter touching herself?
I recently caught my 3 yr old in a similar situation. I didn't see her actually touching anything but she had undressed herself in one area. I just didn't make a big deal about it and told her to pull up her pants. I said, "We don't do that, don't do it again." So far so good. Maybe just try not to make a huge deal out of it. Just tell her that "We don't do that, " and see what happens if you haven't already tried that. Little kids exploring themselves is pretty normal stuff. If she keeps it up tell her she's going to time out or a spanking.
What should be my reaction if my child trips and falls?
"What should be my reaction if my child trips and falls?" I was at the playground with my son and daughter. My son was seven and playing with friends in the soccer cage, I was sitting on a bench watching over the sandbox. My daughter had found a tricycle that was a bit too big for her, but she's undaunted and pedaling around the sandbox. Nica misjudged her speed going around the far corner and the tricycle toppled. Like I taught her, she tucked and protected her head as she hit the dirt. Next to me, three mother came to their feet to rush over and I said, "What are you doing?""She fell," one of them said. "Your daughter?""Yes," I said. "Sit down."One of the others looked at me. "She needs comforting." "She's fine," I said. "Sit down." They looked at me like I was nuts, but they sat down. My daughter came to her feet, looking pissed off and dusting off her clothes. She looked at me and I tilted my head as if to ask, "Are you OK?"Nica turned away from me and walked back to the toppled tricycle. She tried to lift it back on its wheels, but it's a solid steel playground tricycle and she cannot lift the bicycle. That proves to be too much for her and she starts to cry.I turned to the mothers. "Now you can go over and comfort her, if you want."They glared at me, and I grinned and got up, walked over to my daughter, picked up the tricycle and told her to be more careful around the bends. My advice, if you want it:Your child will fall. Many, many times. When he or she falls, look at them with a neutral expression. No worry or fear or pity. The child will take their cues from you. If you look shocked, the child will become shocked. If you look like it's no big deal, they'll dust themselves off and keep going. Unless they will scrape up their hands or knees. If they do, wash out the scrapes with warm water, put on a bandaid if the scrapes keep bleeding, and let them play on.I don't worry about bumps and bruises and scrapes. Let them hurt themselves, that's how they learn not to take certain risks. I only interfere if there's a chance on getting seriously hurt - broken bones, missing limbs, that sort of thing.
How do I tell my Mom to back off without hurting her feelings?
I had my son 6 months ago, my mother has been trying to tell me how to do things from the start. I know that she is trying to help, but she is really getting on my nerves. This is my first child, so I'm learning every day and think I'm doing a great job. I don't know how to tell her to just back off and if I need advise I'll ask without hurting her feelings she is very sensitive and I am sure she will take it personally.