Death About My Loving Father

How do I cope with the death of my father?

One midnight around 0200 A.M. my father came to Chennai in a car and told just after a severe caughing he couldn't speak for 10 sec. He wanted to admit in a hospital immediately for that. He was admitted and all tests were carried out and found plaque at the junction of main arteries in the neck. No solutuon for that except an operation which had very poor success rate. He was treated with medicines only.Till the age of 63 he was never admitted in a hospital. After that incident hospital was very much dear to him. He kept on changing doctors and hospitals every time.Finally one day he fell in coma ,within three days,soul detached from his body.I knew he was going to die soon and preparing everybody for that incidence. But none were accepting the reality. It was 4 a.m when he lost his life and every body started crying only. Nobody was there to help me. I was doing alone all the arrangements.In the background ,I was thanking him for all the good things done in my life.He never scolded me except two or three occasions , that I used to treate it as a noble prize.Teaching Swimming etc, Encouraging me to buy things for the family /agriculture at the very young age itself.When I failed in the Pre University Exam, he might be the only father to suggest a tutorial college without scolding.When I asked him for the admission for the aviation course, he gladly agreed as if he was going to study.Even after my mother's objection to Pilot training,he coolly permitted me without her knowledge.He was encouraging and supporting me at every turning point in my life.Now coming back to the question.As a father he did his duties more than any father. He was proud of my achievements in my life. He was very much sick for four years and had more than enough trouble. It was his time to go.So I never grieved at that time. But problem was whose ever came and met me with sad mood got a shock because I had no feelings in my face. I was inside thanking him for all the good things done to me. Only once i cried for five minutes during that period.For my successful life till now ,my father was the root cause.Thank you Father.Thanks to Quora to express my feelings.

How can I enjoy my life after the death of my father?

My father died very suddenly when I was 19 (of a massive heart attack). I'm an only child and I was closer to him then to my mother.It was absolutely devastating to me and I couldn't think of anything else, just that he was gone. I would wake up and the first thought I had was "my father is dead". I couldn't take pleasure in anything and I thought, for the first time, how short life is, how pointless it can seem.I also thought of all the bad things I had done and said, things that had hurt him or upset him. I told him I was sorry again and again in my head. I also asked him all the things I never got around to when he was alive - questions about his boyhood and what life was like for him before I was born.I couldn't even talk about him without crying.Yes, I know he would have wanted me to be happy, I know he didn't hold the bad things I had done against me but it didn't help - I had enough regret for an army.And then slowly, slowly, over months, I became able to think about other things, after years I was able to talk about him without crying. I didn't try - it just happened. But you know, every night before I go to sleep I still tell him goodnight. Whenever something good or bad happens to me I still let him know and I often let him know that I haven't forgotten him, that I'll always remember.My father died 35 years ago.