How do I react when people talk behind my back?
Here are a few ideas -Plug in your earphones. Squint your eyes and like a ninja, quickly glance left and right. When no one is looking, discreetly turn down the volume to zero. You’re a sneaky little devil, aren’t you? Crafty too! Everybody around you thinks that you’re listening to music. That you can’t hear what they’re saying. So, they’ll immediately start bitching about you. But you, like a pro ninja, would be listening to every word they utter. Every ten seconds, start headbanging or swaying your shoulders to further enhance the illusion.Buy a cell phone. Actually, buy a hundred cellphones. Turn on their voice recorders. Then visit the homes of all your friends and relatives who you suspect bitch about you behind your back. Ask them for a glass of water. Wow! You’re a master spy. James Bond would be so jealous of your moves right now. When they go to the kitchen, plant a cell phone under their dining room table, ’coz… u know… dining room is where the bitching takes place. If you want to be on the safe side, plant a cellphone in every room of their house. Boy! you’re gonna need a lot of cell phones.Ask your tailor to sew a microphone in the back of your every t-shirt. Develop a machine learning algorithm to analyze the data that your microphones collect throughout the day and identify the most bitchy bitchers. Sell that algorithm to Google for a billion dollars. Retire and spend the rest of your days in Hawaii, basking in the sun on sandy beaches, sipping virgin Mojitos and bitching about your old friends.Or you could… you know… just stop giving a fuck!
Do looks really matter in life? Do good looking people have an advantage?
Yes, looks matter.Don't tell me that you have not been bullied in school/college/office because of how fat/skinny/nerdy you look?Don't tell me that you were not made to stand in the back rows during stage performances in school, while a few beautiful faces were always there at the first rows?Don't tell me that you weren't judged by how you look, Fat : you must be eating your siblings’ food as well. Skinny : Don't your parents give you any food to eat? Fair : How much makeup have you applied?/how many visits of parlor do you make in a month? Dark : start applying sunscreen, fairness creams, blah blah blah…Don't tell me your first crush was not because of how cute/sexy he/she looks?Don't tell me when you imagine your future partner the first question that pop up inside your head isn't 'I really wonder how he/she will look like? 'Don't tell me that the person you loved the most didn't chose someone else who was more impressive than you in terms of looks?Don’t tell me that you don’t click on ‘Read More’ whenever you see a picture of someone good looking on Quora answers?Don’t tell me you don’t follow hot/cute girls/boys on Instagram and admire how perfect they look?Don’t tell me that you have not been rejected because of your looks?Don’t tell me that this little kid is famous because of his talent and not looks :Don’t tell me this girl did something extra-ordinary and became an overnight star because of that and not because of her looks and wink and expressions? :And girls don’t tell me your heart doesn’t skips a beat everytime he smiles ? :Don’t tell me that good looking people don’t have any advantage !Looks do matter in the society we live in and this is one of the bitter truths that we need to digest.Good looks matter but it is a good heart that makes all the difference :)-Unnati :)
If a person is born deaf, which language do they think in?
They don't and neither do you.It is incorrect to say you think in a language. The thoughts that you hear in your head are the thoughts you think you think. You think in symbols and then translate to a language, it simply goes on at a speed that is tens of thousands times faster than your awareness. You perceive in a language, which is to say, the conscious awareness of your thinking is in a language, the one you are using the most. Hearing people are probably more aural than visual and are hearing their thoughts as if spoken. People born deaf are visual and perceive their conscious thoughts in visual form, perhaps in their signed language, but both are actually thinking (the step prior to conscious awareness) sybolically.I have spoken to accountants who have spent several 20 hour days working on a new spreadsheet say that they “think” in “electronic spreadsheet.” the same is true of programmers who might temporarily be aware of their thoughts or dreams in a program language , the same is true of composers who might temporarily think in musical notes substituting for thoughts. Meditators and mathematicians frequently discuss their awareness of “thought” being symbolic, one thing substituting for another and conclusions made as if it were in a formula. The actual thinking is occurring in one's own personal symbology, and the awareness is expressed in a language.There are those few people who claim that they are aware of their thoughts but no language is used in thst awareness. And, there are synesthetes, that 4% of the population that hears colors or sees sounds. They most assuredly have the ability to do a very quick translation in order to communicate, because clearly their memory is fioed away in their personal language.So, persons who are born with absolutely no hearing, think no differently than the rest, they use a personal symbology just as everyone else, they merely use a different language overlay for their awareness of their thoughts than those who hear.
Do Japanese people like foreigners who try to speak Japanese?
Outside of Japan, I have run into two very distinct types of people.The first and most common, are people who are thrilled that you are learning their language and will do everything in their power to forward your progress. I had two Japanese old ladies at a restaurant practically adopt me when I would stop there for dinner after Japanese class.The second type, which I would estimate at about 20%, don’t want to have anything to do with it. I’ve had entire conversations where I spoke only Japanese and the person I was speaking to spoke only English.One time, when I was in Paris for business, I went to a Sukiyaki place near my hotel. I proceeded to speak in Japanese. The people there immediately started speaking French to me. I told them I didn’t speak French, which was true. They then shifted to English. I told them I didn’t speak English, which was a lie. They then asked me what language I did speak. I made up some “mock Russian”, which thankfully, they didn’t speak. Essentially, I left them no choice other than Japanese. They were not happy, but as I said, they represent only about 20%.On the same trip, I got onto an elevator full of Japanese business men. I don’t remember what I said but one of them responded with “o jouzu desu nee” (you’re good) to which I responded “ton demo nai” (no way). Today I would probably say “mata heta desu” (I’m still bad). Anyway, this resulted in more friends as a result of trying to speak Japanese. Everytime I ran into some of them in the elevator they wanted to help me with my Japanese.So I would say that most Japanese people don’t mind and are even happy. There is that 20% though, that don’t want you to try and speak Japanese.
Do you think the worst when a stranger waves or says hello to your child?
My husband has the habit of smiling at or saying hello to strangers who pass by on the street or ride the bus with us. Most people return the gesture with a smile, a few others look at him as if he had two heads or sometimes try to remember if they have met. Often, when he waves hello or smiles at children, the parents yank them by the arms in other to bring the child closer or stare mortified at the better half. We are not surprised by the reaction and understand, in a way, why other parents do that. Today, riding the bus with our children, a woman said something to him after he said hi to her kids who were standing next to us that made us wonder if he should simply stop before he is accused of something horrible or labeled a sick man. It was weird. Do you feel the same as the other parents we've encountered? Would you feel more at ease if it was a woman and not a man waving at your family? Just curious.
My son, age ten is a generally great kid, but he has a short fuse.?
He does sound like a typical 10 year old... BUT.. that doesn't mean you ignore his ill-behavior. You need to walk the line between under-reacting to his behavior and over-reacting to it. I think the best idea is to thoughtfully respond to what he's doing. I'd wait until he's not in one of those moments.. .then talk to him calmly about how HE feels when he acts like that... And whether or not he thinks there might be a better way of handling himself. Then you can talk to him about what YOU do to control temper and feelings. Also remember that boys have a high need for physical exersion to release emotional tension... So giving him chores to do on a regular basis... lawn mowing, wood chopping, window washing, car washing... those are all good, constructive things he can do... that will also give him "thinking" and "processing" time... Also, a basketball hoop (pitching net, soccer net, golf swing net.. anything he can do on his own to release those pheromones) isn't a bad idea... and it comes with a line that goes something like this... "Y'know, when I get frustrated with stuff, I like to (fill in the blank)... I know some people who take a walk or go for a run.. or shoot hoops for awhile... maybe that might be something that will help you."... See? He's 10... just talk to him about it. My guess is, he's not any happier about his behavior than you are.. and he's feeling guilty about it, too, and doesn't know what to do with all the new things he's feeling.... So help him out.