Stay at home mom?
Why do so many women want to go to work. Being a stay at home mom is the most rewarding experience I have ever had. My husband is a lawyer so he makes more than enough for me to not have to work. He has always taken care of me and gone out of his way to pamper me. When I got pregnant with our son he was so supportive and has been a wonderful father to our son. The best part about it is getting to stay home and breast feed my baby I just don't understand why a women would choose the stress of a job over getting to be a stay at home mom why not find a great man that will take care of you?
If your husband made enough money for you to stay home with your toddler, would you? What if it might kill your career?
I was fortunate and grateful to have been able to choose whether to be a stay at home parent or working mom after my second was born. My husband was 100% supportive of whatever I decided so it was up to me to do some serious soul-searching. Ultimately, I elected to stay home with my 3 and 1 year olds.Why? I know the days are long but the years are short. I know I will blink and they will be in Kindergarten. A 4 year hiatus from my professional trajectory may seem like a career killer but I have to have confidence in my value and unique skill set to be able to re-join the workforce when it's time.Guess what? The time DID indeed pass quickly and I'm now actively looking to return to full time work. I may not have cracked Director level in the timeline that I had planned but I am still young and have time and motivation to get there.More importantly, I look back at the time I had with my little ones and it gives me more satisfaction that any title or salary band.I do not regret a thing. And my career is far from dead. And when I'm at the end of this life’s journey, I know I will think back on these years as the best ones of my life (rather than my days in an office).So that's my take.
Would you like to be a stay at home mom?
Yes, and I’m not ashamed to admit it.I’m not an entrepreneurial type. I’m never going to start my own business or develop my own website.I’m not a managerial type either. I could never see myself as CEO of anything, or the leader of a task force.I can't really see myself working a desk job for the rest of my life, or sitting in an office trying to put my degree to good use.It’s not that I’m not ambitious - but my ambitions have never been centred around ‘What Career I’m Going to Have’ or ‘The Companies I’m Going to Work For’ or anything like that.My ambitions have always centred around:The People I’m Going to Spend Time WithThe Way I Will Serve in my CommunityThe Places I Will GoThe Things I Will Do for FunThe People I Will MeetMaybe I’m old fashioned. Are all the feminists crying out for me to reject the patriarchy, to throw off the heavy bonds of motherhood and free myself?I’m still going to get a degree. I’m still going to get a job. But ultimately, I can only really see a couple of options for my future:A fulfilling job that allows me to travel overseas and serve others (I’m thinking something on the lines of education and translation in impoverished countries).A stay at home mum that serves in her local community, always volunteering her time to worthy causes, always helping out the local fundraisers, always putting their hand up when something needs doing. Maybe working part time in some other way that can help support my husband or the community.Maybe my opinion will change. But currently these sound like great options, all while taking care of potential children.
My husband doesn't make enough money?
So you need to talk with your husband about this...at a good time. Explain to him that it's very hard on you to go out and work 2 jobs and then come home and be a mother and a wife. Maybe you can work one job part time if really neccessary, and leave the other one in order to have more time at home and with your children. The other option to question, would be to leave both jobs if there are thing that you can do without (cut down your expenses). PS. Marriage is about each giving 100% (not the 50/50 stuff some people say).
Stay at home moms.....have you ever thought about this?
There is nothing wrong with this. I would also plan what will happen to you and your fiance in case of divorce (pre-nup) with money issues, housing issues etc. Also in the case you do have children plan about that too - who will have custody eyc. This saves a lot of heart ache. If you feel this would be an issue to bring up about having a pre-nup then quite possibly he is not the one. I thought my current ex and I would be together forever. But as you can see - he is now an ex. We made no contigencies for the future in case of divorce - ie custody, housing issues etc. This is always a good idea so as to avoid lengthy court battles. It is also called responsibility. For those that say you are thinking doomsday before you even get married - you are not. It is called responsibility :-) Also as far as children go - quality time is always better than quantity time. Someone who spends every second of every day with their child might not be making that time count. I know this because I have been on both sides of the coin. While I would love to be able to stay hoem with my dd, that is not possible. I did that for her first three years, now I have to work. As long as you think responsibly before you get married and in decisions regarding any children you will be fine. Work together with your fiance (husband) you and the children will be fine.
How did you decide to be a stay at home mom?
It was 25 years ago. When pregnant with my first child, I had decided that I was returning to my job, which I loved, which paid quite well, and where I was a professional treated with great respect. My husband supported this. In the 7th month of that pregnancy, I became doubtful.I married (at age 35) and started my family (at age 37) later than most women. I had chosen to get my career off the ground first. I had worked very hard and for many years, already. As the birth of my first child got closer to a reality, I began to question everything.I had devoted 15 years to working my way up a corporate ladder. It went by quickly. Using this chunk of time as a guide, I wondered how fast another 15 years might fly by? What if I decided to give the next 15 years to the little copies of ourselves, which my husband and I would be leaving behind once we depart this earth? After all, if I lived to be 90, then devoting 15 years to little ones would be a roughly 16% of my life. This seemed reasonable. Also, my 15 years in the dog-eat-dog business life had taught me that I would not be missing all that much if I chose to stay at home.So, I spoke with many older men and women to learn more. I asked them if they regretted working full time while their children were growing up. I asked them if they thought it mattered and if they would have done anything differently, now that they were finished rearing kids. Most men wished they had spent more time at home but also quickly added the explanation …. someone has to pay for their braces and their food and clothing, etc. Most women (who had worked outside of the home) hemmed and hawed and stammered unclear responses.So I changed my question to this: Do you wish you had spent less time with your children when they were young? Every single person answered the same way. Everyone said No, of course not. I wish I had spent more time, not less time.I decided to give my unborn child the next 15 years of my life. Since I ended up having 4 kids, this ended up being 25 years, not 15. Absolutely. No. Regrets.
I'm a stay at home mom and all of my neighbors keep asking me to babysit! Need advice!?
I don't work anymore. I am a certified pharmacy tech but my husband makes enough money so that i was able to quit working. I have a daughter and she just started school this year so I don't have her during the day anymore. I still have lots to do! My husband owns his own business and I do paperwork and such for him sometimes along with caring for my daughter, his son, and all housework. Anyways, all of my neighbors are constantly asking me to babysit. I just had one call me up and caught me off guard to watch her daughter tomorrow so she doesn't have to call in at work. This past weekend two different neighbors asked me to babysit their kids (they each have 2) so they could go out and party. I am only 28 years old. I NEVER get to go out or do anything and it seems everyone around me thinks because I don't go to work everyday I have nothing else to do. I have never asked anyone to babysit for me either, I feel rude. It's not a big deal except it happens way too much, at least once or twice a week. What should I tell them? They are my friends also so I'm afraid they might get pissed off at me. HELP!!!!!!!
Is there anyone in this world who would rather stay at home than travel around the world even after having enough money?
Yessir, right here.I'm an introvert; social interaction wears me out like none other.Honestly, I love seeing new places. I love learning about a culture, and seeing the sights. I love museums, because they're quiet and I can just learn.I love foreign places.However, these places have people. Many of the coolest places have many people (because if they're so cool, of course everyone else wants to see them).Ugh. Nope.I went to New York City a few weeks ago, and I think I had my fill of foreign sights and sounds.It was overwhelming. My first night in the city, I just sat in Times Square and looked.I didn't speak. I didn't take pictures. I didn't walk around.I sat.It was too much. People were chattering, cars were honking and beeping, footsteps tapped the pavement.People chattered. Voices rose and fell. Chattering.I can't handle the big city. I'd love to live in New York, but not all the time. I could visit, but never stay. I can't handle the chatter.That's how I feel about travel. I like it in doses, but even with unlimited money, I might just stay home. I can read all about the cool places without having to go. There are fewer people that way.