GS: What lessons did you learn from your parents/grandparents?
What my mother taught me: When in doubt, beat the **** out of someone. What my father taught me: When in doubt, whip it out.
How should I deal with my father-in-law's excessive interference and domination over my personal life and marriage if my husband supports him instead of me?
Such a great question!It can be really hard when we have a father-in-law that is overstepping boundaries and getting in between you and your relationship. As a result, this can cause a lot of tension and arguments in your relationship.When we first think about getting married, the idea of joining two families together is very exciting. You can't wait to say "I do" and officially have new parents who you want to call "mom and dad".Unfortunately, not everyone is able to experience a joyous blending of two families and often find themselves frustrated and angry at certain aspects and interactions with their in-laws. This can be very hard to deal with, and disappointing.When in-laws start to become a negative aspect of your life, that is when it is getting toxic. Relationships with in-laws are quite complicated. Every family is different in terms of the type of relationship people have them, but the idea of acceptance seems to be common throughout.If people have good relationships with their in-laws, they should consider themselves lucky! However, that’s not the story for many people.It’s important to be able to spot the signs of having toxic in-laws so you know how to address the issue.Signs of Toxic In-Laws1. They are overly involved in your decisions2. They try to turn you and your significant other against you3. Your privacy as a couple is not respected4. They say negative things about you to your significant other5. They ignore you6. They make insulting commentsHere are some solutions on how you can manage your in-law:1. Always remember that you and your significant other are a team2. Both you and your spouse address issues to your own parents; don't confront the in-laws3. Take appropriate space when needed4. Set boundaries5. Don't insult your in-laws in front of your spouse; be respectfulNo matter what, it’s important to remember that you and your significant other are a unit, and should be united together as your own family. It’s important to take care of yourself if you have an in-law that is causing frustration, which ultimately helps protect the relationship from harm that could arise if you did not take steps to address it appropriately.I actually created a video related to your question. I think it will be helpful in terms of going into detail about ways you can manage your father-in-law. Feel free to check it out when you get a chance. :)
How do you deal with a mother who is never on your side and always defends your sibling?
You have to be practical. Don’t make it about who your mother loves more or making sure everything is equal. Consider your life and what is important in that and focus on that. Read up on negotiation skills and develop skills in negotiating rather than simply demanding your way or demanding agreement. You’ll get further by focusing on the important things and developing more skills.Let’s say that your mother is truly always against you and for your sibling. Sometimes it seems that way when it isn’t. Or sometimes you might be off base yourself and not realize it. Nobody owes you their agreement or equal agreement with you as with someone else. So, consider whether you’re actually always right or right half the time.Worst case scenario might be that you’re a saint and your sibling is a sinner and your mother still defends them and is never on your side. Let it be their problem. Find ways to cope with life without having to have your mother take your side. That may be hard, and for the hard situations, the better your negotiation skills are the more you’ll get accomplished.It’s hard not to take it personally when it’s your mother, but the less personal you let it be, the clearer your head will be. So, let’s say there is one extra family car, and your sibling always gets to use it and you never do. You have a perfect driving record and are always honest, law abiding, respectful, and dependable. Your sibling has lots of tickets, lies a lot, breaks the law, and is undependable. Your mother just favors your sibling. Okay, accept that. You can’t change another person. But, you may be able to bargain with your mothers. “If I do the grocery shopping on Saturday, can I have the use of the extra car that evening starting at 6?” Your mom might go for that since the other sibling won’t bother, and it would be nice to have someone else shop for a change.Or, if it’s a matter of just opinions, accept their opinions and don’t worry about who agrees if it’s just talking and not about anything practical. You don’t need other people to agree with all your opinions. Don’t worry about it. It has nothing to do with your value.Basically, it’s a matter of acceptance, practicality, and maturity. You can’t control another person, and it’s not practical to try to make your parent be how you think a parent should be. They are who they are. You be the best person you can be and let other people be who they are.
If you are a parent, does it make you concerned if your heterosexual child has homosexual friends and hangs out with them?
I’m a heterosexual girl, and in these past couple of years, I made a lot of homosexual friends.One night, I was about to meet my friends, so I had to tell my mother before leaving. Me, being a girl, she proceeded to ask me how much boys and girls there will be, I said “mostly boys, but most are gay, and it’s not an issue either way”.I dropped that on her without thinking and she said I should be careful around gay people (her beliefs are mostly founded on popular medias), to which I strongly disagreed.I then explained the issue I had with my mother, to my sister (10 years older), who said “well, it IS a bit weird to hang out with so many gays, but you do what you want.”I was baffled. My family never told me anything negative about gays and their lifestyle. At 9yo I saw a lesbian couple for the 1st time, holding hands, that’s when they casually told me that this also happens. So I was pretty proud that my parents were surprisingly so open-minded.Boy, was I wrong.One night, I had a serious discussion concerning all my friendships in general with my parents, we disagreed on many terms.“Well, you’re an adult now, we can’t tell you what to do, and why and who you shouldn’t hang out with.But you have to know that when you hang out with these gay people, it hurts us. It affects how people view you, and our family. It makes them talk, and others believe you are also like that. And that HURTS US.”My blood was boiling.See, I’m a tomboy. I’m fat, I’m flat, quite tall, and don’t dress nor act lady-like.At age 5, I said I wanted to be a boy (because it was cooler), stopped wearing dresses and skirts at 7, and stopped wearing pink at 13 yo.Needless to say, my family believed and still believes that I am a lesbian. No matter how many times I refute or deny it.My parents are concerned that I hang out with homosexuals. That they’d rape me, or let their “strong emotions loose and hurt me,” that I would be “like them,” that it would spread rumours about me and about how my parents raised me.Thing is, I like boys. Always have, always will, and I have to be extremely simple-minded, or a denied homo/ bi to flip and like girls.I don’t understand my family’s concern.I trust and love my friends, and when my family says that I hurt them because of the choice of people I made as friends, as individuals outside family that support me, well, they hurt ME.
How do you know the genotypes of the parents in a dihybrid cross?
First, determine how many different gametes are possible. This is done acording to the formula: 2↑(number of heterozygous genes). In each case, the number of heterozygous genes is ONE (Ss for the first and Gg for the second), and 2↑1 = 2, so you know that there are 2 gametes from each parent. Then, make the gametes by choosing the alleles so that each gamete has ONE and ONLY ONE allele from each gene. So, The GGSs parent produces 2 gametes, GS and Gs. The Ggss parent produces 2 gametes, Gs and gs. The Punnett square is: _____GS_____Gs___ Gs___X_______X____ gs___X_______X____