People call me beautiful but I will never ever believe it. I won’t ever let myself. I always compare myself to others and think I am never good enough. Why am I like this?
Hi there,I am touched by your question because I, too, struggle with the same feelings everyday, and have for most of my life. Yet, seldom do I experience anyone who is willing to share their similarities in that respect.I believe that this applies to men and women. We, primitively, are designed to want to compete for our ideal mate, and have assurance that they will stay.However, our culture has taught men that they will gain more social status and acceptance by having sex with as many women as possible, or at least talk about doing it. I’ve heard many stories of men sleeping with a woman, not because he found her very attractive, but because he wanted to feel desirable, or validated, or not be rude, and she wanted him. Not all men are piggish and honestly view women as objects; most of them are simply raised that if you behave or act that way, you’ll receive positive attention among your core group. There are always men that do not fall within this bubble, but I digress.Our culture has also taught women that men value looks more than any other quality, and that they are the most important. Women are taught early on that beauty is within a very small prism - and I don’t have to even describe that prism for us all to get a similar image or images in our heads. So, women who would probably be deemed attractive to millions of men across the world, do not know it, because they don’t fit within those narrow confines, and therefore will not receive attention for it. However, if you hypothetically were to line up every adult male in the world and ask their honest opinion on your attractiveness, you can bet that a large sum will probably deem you attractive, no matter what other large sums think as well. There’s so many people out there and so many different beautiful looks!Don’t compare yourself. Men are always going to be boasting about women they find attractive, and it won’t always be you. But if you want, you can always surround yourself around gentlemen who do not speak that way, if it sincerely bothers you. It use to bother me a lot. Now it only does occasionally, if it’s taken too far.Hope this helps!
What should I do if my husband keeps saying things that hurt my feelings? He says that he is not trying to hurt me. He also says I am being too sensitive.
It is time to focus on your needs. Think about all your needs, that are not being met, right now. He is taking up a lot of your mental energy. It’s not fair.Don’t confront him because he will deny it. Be nice to him. Yeah appear sensitive and even cry in front of him. Give him that satisfaction.It’s time to level the playing field. Here are some ideas:Remove one battery of a remote control, when he struggles to change the channel, don’t speak a word, grab it out of his hands and put that one battery in. Or if he struggles to open a champagne bottle, grab it out of his hands and open it for him. It’s called art of emasculation.Take his beautiful expensive shirt, throw tea on it and put it back in the closet to dry and forget about it.Put super glue/melt the back of his favorite shoes, to flatten the sole. When he wears those shoes, put oil on the stairs, so that he falls to the floor.Clean the commode with just his toothbrush every single day, wash it and keep it in it’s place.Cut the wire of the television, the day he has to watch his favorite sport.Put itch powder in his pants, just don’t get caught.If he uses hair gel, throw the contents out and fill it up with hair removal gel.Put mousetraps in dark closets, or by the bed so when he wakes in the middle of the night, he gets trapped.Try to open his cologne, empty some of it out, put dog pee in it. You can also use the dog pee in his mouthwash.If he has laptop, open the back case and throw away the hard-drive or misplace any object that he likes.If he spends money on a gadgets/leather gloves/expensive ties, hide it somewhere first and then sell it on ebay.If he has allergic reaction to something, you know exactly what to do. Then drive him to the hospital, after you had your fun.(Yeah, my parents thought I was a creative child while growing up.)Just don’t get caught. The trick is to have a gap (of at least 7–10 days) in between so that he forgets about things.Once you feel satisfied, dump his sorry ass.