Have You Been Around A Tranny

Is the word "tranny" a slur?

When a person or group has a long history of angry opponents menacing them, physically assaulting them, degrading them, or belittling them while repeating a particular word, then that word -  for the menaced group - will come to feel threatening and hurtful no matter who is saying it or the circumstances of use. Let's say you have freckles, and for some reason a lot of people in your society and kids at your school are convinced freckles are a sign of innate shiftiness: that all freckled people lie constantly and steal whenever they can get away with it. Perhaps they call people like you "spotty". If for your whole childhood you hear "Spotty!" yelled at you in hate, sometimes even accompanied by a physical beating, you're going to twitch when some well-meaning person at the office says, "I changed cell companies because their coverage was just too spotty." Yes, it's an ordinary word with a mainstream meaning, but you grew up being slurred with it, and therefore even hearing it inocuously causes you to tense up, possibly to get a panic attack. Now if someone in the office who claims not to hate or dislike freckled people nonetheless refers to you by that term ("Alex? Yeah, he's the spotty in the corner over there."), or even calls you spotty to your face, you would be justified in asking that coworker politely to lay the hell off, because they are using an offensive term, whether they mean it offensively or not. An awful lot of trans women hear "tranny" said to and about them in situations of fear, disgust, and violence. If you've never been slurred with it, you have no right at all to use or "reclaim" the term, because you do not know how it feels.Individuals who DO know how it feels may choose to use and celebrate the label among themselves, as a way of triumphing over past assholes by taking their power away and using it for themselves. Many historically-denigrated groups are doing this (gay men with faggot, kinksters with pervert, people with physical differences with crip, non-slim people with fat, etc).  But that is not something I -  as someone who has never been slurred with the word - can do.

How do I live on after being called a tranny? Three people say that I look like a man.

If it bothers you then change the way you look. Luckily, appearance is the easiest thing to change. You can wear different make up, do your hair differently, change the way you dress, change the way you sit, stand, walk, and talk.You can ask for friends for advice on how to change your appearance to appear less like a tranny.If you don't feel comfortable talking to your friends you can go and see a personal stylist and tell them your concerns and get their advice.If you're utterly, utterly desperate you can get cosmetic surgery. But this is only a last resort if the easier and safer solutions don't work out.