Wanna bring my boyfriend on my family vacation?
So, my family and I along with a few other relatives always have a tradition of going down south for April vacation. Every year it's been the same, except last year when my sister brought a friend. This year there really wasn't much planning for it, and I had found out that some of my relatives would not be coming this year, which means there's a spot left in the house were staying at. I not too long ago started a relationship with my boyfriend. My parents know a bit about him from what I've shared with them along with getting to know him when I started hanging out with him. I'd really like to take this opportunity to have him join my family on my April vacation trip. He's even offered to help pay for gas (since we're driving down south) along with anything else that might be necessary for the trip. I really would like him to come with me and my family, because 1) I'd be able to spend more time with him 2) he'd be able to meet more of my family and get to know them better 3) he'd be staying in another room 4) I'd be considerate and not try anything since it's a vacation with family. I still have yet to ask my parents, so I'll be asking them today. I just want some input and thoughts on this plan. Please leave good comments and have a great vacation:)
How can I be more comfortable around my boyfriend's family?
Several suggestions: 1. Have you tried talking to your boyfriend about how you feel around his parents? Maybe he can help you come up with ways to feel more comfortable. Like, perhaps he can help get conversations started and can work to keep them going. If he wants you to feel more comfortable, he can do his part by helping to make that happen. 2. You can try throwing caution to the wind and just be yourself. I know it's easier said than done, but think about it: a relationship with a boy also means a relationship with his family. If his family won't like you for who you are, then that should be a sign that maybe the match isn't right for you. Let his family get to know the "real" you, the one that your boyfriend likes. 3. It doesn't have to be perfect. Let yourself off the hook! Accept that you're not going to be 100% comfortable right away. Tell your boyfriend this, also. You might have some days where you're 5% comfortable, other days where you're 15%, then back down to 10%, then up to 30%...and, gradually, you'll work to the point where you're completely comfortable. A time limit is not necessary. Your boyfriend should not pressure you and let you build up your relationship with his parents in your own way.
What if I am uncomfortable with my boyfriend bringing his family members to my date? This is our first date and it's to the movies, is this okay?
I was in the same predicament… I'm gay and of course my partner is too. We've been together for 6 years and still going strong today. We meet once at a health rally and then a year went by. We got around to chatting with one another on Facebook for about 3months and decided to meet up again… when I got to the location she was there with two of her friends… the conversation was more like a long line of questioning and the whole time me and her barely talked to one another.Even till this day I still bring it up to her as a joke, but honestly I hated it. It was the worst way to open up our relationship.. and Im a very blunt person and even told her that the only reason I continued on getting to know her more was because of the time we spent chatting on Facebook. I don't regret it either.My advise tell him you want the date to be one on one or just bring a friend or family member of yours…. Even the odds
How did you become comfortable with bringing a same-sex partner home to your parents?
There was a gradual process of getting them used to it. I came out very early, when I was fourteen, but didn't have sex until I was nineteen, so there were a few years for them to sort of get used to the idea, but just the idea, without any outward manifestation of me being gay. Then I started dating and going out with guys. I would talk to them occasionally about it. One time I remember a particularly cute guy I was seeing showed up in a leather jacket driving an El Camino to take me out when I was staying with my mom and dad. That was kind of funny. I live in a different city than them, and later when I was dating someone they flew out here and it seems to me we went for lunch together, rather uneventfully if memory serves. Introductions, chit chat, nothing to lose sleep over.More recently, I was seriously seeing someone who actually hadn't come out to his mom yet. The three of us went for lunch together and I was surprised by how blasé his mom was about meeting me. It wasn't until later that he admitted to me that he hadn't even told her that I was his boyfriend! She just thought I was some random guy. Weird. I ended up going to her place with him for Thanksgiving and making us all a lovely dinner. He came and stayed with me at my mom and dad's at Christmas. That was a first for me. We stayed with them one night, and then just the two of us spent a weekend at a hotel. It was perfect. It didn't make them uncomfortable and we weren't crashing there for too long, but they got to hang out with him and get to know him informally. He also came with me to a summer vacation with my whole extended family. You just told your mom a few days ago. The process of me becoming comfortable with who I am and my parents learning to accept me and get to know about my life as a gay man has taken years. It's a work in progress. As an adult, you get to decide how much of your life you want to share with your parents. For a variety of reasons, from distance, to lack of respect or understanding by family members, to homophobia, to cultural differences, you may want to limit the involvement of your family in your life. It's up to you and your future partners.
How do I learn to be more comfortable around my sister and her boyfriend? I'm not used to PDA.
You shouldn't have to. PDA is just not polite or considerate. Most of us have done it without thinking about it. It just takes someone bringing it to our attention to make us realize we are making people around us uncomfortable.Get other family members to engage in some good natured ribbing of the couple’s obtuse behavior, so that they realize what they are doing and stop.
I dont feel comfortable about showing PDA around my parents but it makes my boyfriend mad. What should i do?
I feel really bad because he is ready to give me 100% in public, but I cant bring myself to do the same. I don't know what to do because i want to make him happy. Should I just let it go and suck it up or should I just tell him I cant take that kind of affection?
What does it mean if I dreamt of my boyfriend meeting my family for the first time?
It probably means that you’re normal, and that you may have some boyfriend issues.When someone is important in our lives, we want to share that joy with others. That you could get close enough to someone to have them be “my boyfriend” without that person ever meeting your family is, I think, informative. There may be a reason why.What spurred me to answer your question was an experience I had last week in a fast food restaurant. I was sitting in a booth enjoying a breakfast burrito and reading my newspaper. Two young women sat down at a table about 12 feet away. One appeared nervous or distraught. She was thin, with pale white skin. Below her short, tight floral print dress her fast-twitch muscles bounced her legs nervously above her sandals. She had super-heavy dark eye makeup that, given her pale white skin, became her defining feature. It wasn’t goth because it had prominent gold sparkles. It was just her choice of personal style. Her companion was a more ample bodied girl with a heavy sleeve tattoo who seemed to be relaxed and happy.As the two women talked, one could see that this was important girlfriend time. The nervous woman needed to have this time with her understanding friend. I made my way slowly through the burrito and my newspaper. When I got a coffee refill, the happy girlfriend and I exchanged pleasant smiles. By then I could see that the thin girl was more comfortable. Her legs had stopped bouncing, and she leaned forward to talk with her friend more earnestly.The only piece of conversation that I heard drifted over during a silent period in the room. It was the girl with the eyeshadow talking about her father. It was clear that she cared about him. Still, it sounded as if he was judgmental, perhaps about things in her life. In her newly found, positive and confident tone, she said to her stable friend, “I want to meet a boyfriend that I can take home to my family.”So my perhaps-conclusion was that a nice, sweet girl had decided on a slightly edgy persona that ended up attracting a problematic type of boyfriend. They had broken up, and that was the reason for the long talk with the stable, always there for you girlfriend. Looking forward, the girl with the eyeshadow realized that what she REALLY wanted was a boy that she could take home to meet her family, including her Dad.Isn’t that what we all want? At least most of us, regardless of our style, orientation, or uniqueness.
If my son is gay but I don't want him to bring his boyfriend to the family Christmas how do I tell him without seeming homophobic and controlling?
I am a mother of two adult sons. One son is gay and one son is straight. I can speak with some authority regarding this question. If one of my sons said, “Mom, I have met someone great. I would love for them to meet you and I am bringing them to Christmas dinner.” I would say, “Great, I can’t wait to meet them! I am making a prime rib roast for dinner. Do they eat red meat, or should I Google some vegan recipes? – Oh, and be sure you give them fair warning about your aunt so-‘n-so, you know how she can be when she hits the sauce after dinner!”Notice I did not differentiate between my sons? The gender of the person they care about makes no difference to me. What does matter is that they are happy and the person they are with treats them well.Let us pretend your son said, “Mom, I have met a great girl and I am crazy about her! I would love for you to meet her and I am brining her to Christmas dinner.” Something tells me you would welcome the woman with open arms, even if you did not know her well. And you certainly would not be on Quora asking how to tell your son not to bring her home for Christmas.Your reasoning for not wanting your son’s partner in your home is disingenuous. Your son is going to see straight through your homophobic and controlling attitude—because it is obvious. It would be great if your son could go to his partner’s side of the family for Christmas dinner. A place where they would both be treated as a welcomed guest. That would gently let you off the hook without you having to concoct some lame excuse as to why they are not welcomed at your home for Christmas.
How to not be shy around my boyfriends parents?
me and my boyfriend have been dating for a little over five months now. i'm a really shyy person and i dont ever really know what to say. my boyfriend gets along so well with my family, both my mom and dad and my brother and sister. he's an only child so when im with his family its just both his parents and i never know what to say, i feel bad cuz he goes out of his way to talk to mine. im just afraid im going to say something that will make me seem unitelligent or affend them. my boyfriend sayas it really bothers him so i really want to get better? can anyone help/