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How Did My Own Child End Up So Much More Well Adjusted

My 6 Year old son has threatened to Kill Himself- What should I do?

Its hard to take him seriously, I have never heard of a child committing suicide at this age, he just turned 6 last month- but I am not naive that something is wrong.
There is no abuse, no lack of structure, no poor parenting, we are educated and have other well adjusted happy kiddos. So its hard to understand where all of his frustration, anger and trouble comes from.

We recently took him to get evaluated for ADHD and have held off on any medication because we aren't convinced it was the best thing to do.

But he has said 4 times now over the last month that he should just kill himself when he was mad or frustrated over something, and he is very hard on himself...I told the Dr. and he just said to start the meds, and see it it helps. What would you do?

What's the best advice you've ever been given on raising a child?


Spend time with your child and he will know you love him. Money is not everything... We all know this is not an issue for you both. Money will not give your child what he needs the most.

He needs LOVE - This is only something that can come from your hearts. Always spend time with doing silly and seemingly meaningless things when he is a baby. Play games and be involved with playing ball or sports WITH him in his young years, Go to see him in school plays or if he is in sports. In general - all through his life be very involved. He will be so much better off for it.

My minister had a father who was very very busy with all kinds of work projects and he (to this day, after being over 55 years old) still uses his younger years as an example of how we wishes so much that his dad could have played ball with him and just spent time with him that seemed to be unimportant at the time.

Time is probably one of the most precious commodities we have on this earth. We can use all our time to make money - or we can forgo on some things and invest our time in raising up well adjusted and LOVED individuals. Investing time in our family is by far the much more valuable and wise investment.

Best of wishes to you both!!! Congratulations!!! May God Bless this baby with All the Love that is possible.
♥ Vic

Why do some children seem unaffected by divorce while others take it so badly?

My guess is that if the parents don't make it seem like a bad thing (especially with younger children) the kids don't think it's a bad thing either. But the parents who sit down with their child and cry and say sad things to the child are more likely to end up with a child who doesn't adapt very well. Or is it just about the child's age?

Anyway what do you think?

Would you consider putting your child in kindergarten a year early?

My advice to you would be to wait until she is 5 before you enroll her in kindergarten. I have been teaching in a Montessori preschool/kindergarten for over 12 years and in the case of every child who does not meet the cut off age for kindergarten and children who are last summer born or early fall born advise the parents not to send them on. It does not matter what they know academically. What matters most is social and emotional development. You say that she does fine socially with those her own age, but how would she do with children 1 or 2 years older than her? Children who start kindergarten early often fall behind. They cry more, have a hard time making friends, playing games, following directions, being on the playground. The other children often see them as the "babies" because they are the youngest in the class. Also, a lot of children who start kindergarten early are held back. They see their peers move on. They feel something is wrong with them because they were left behind.

Over the years I have contacted many former parents who decided to send their child on early. A lot of these children had the problems I mentioned. Every child was held back, most repeated kindergarten, some were held back a grade or two down the road. Every parent who sent their child on regretted their decision!

Also think about her later years. She will always be the youngest. She won’t be able to play sports (they have a cut off age). She'll be a 16 year old in high school with 18 year olds. She will forever try and catch up.

These are some basic skills that you daughter should have before starting school: hold a pencil in an orthodox way, recognize her name, write her name (upper case first letter followed by lower case), know 8 basic colors, cut with scissors, dress herself, take care of bathroom needs. Here is a link to some more readiness skills.

Give her the "gift" of another year! Good luck!