How to discipline a 12 year old ADHD child?
Yes, adhd is crap. It is something school systems started for your average active child. Many studies have been done and kids who have taken medicine are now having a lot of problems. What use to be a class clown or a talkitive person is now labled adhd to make teachers lives easier. Tell the school to deal, and love your child for who they are. If the teacher starts singling the child out then take it all the way to the school bord, for harrasment! I am a deveopmental psyc major!
How does ADHD affect discipline?
If we look at a discipline as an ability of an individual to manage own structured habits and long-term planning, this depends on a developmental stage a person is on. Children will not have the necessary development to understand abstract concepts like responsibility, duty, structure, long-term thinking. So if the child brain function is mostly driven to immediate rewards and interests, it will be more difficult to develop personal discipline. Without correct developmental strategies, some people will stay at this stage for life. Some will develop it when reaching maturity through finding the strategies on their own.However, this does not mean that to develop discipline you need to force it on a child/adult. Forcing something on a person with ADHD will produce the opposite results. The inability to perform an unrewarding behaviour will become only stronger. It’s a negative reinforcement.On the contrary, to promote individual discipline a person needs an abundance of social and sensory rewards.[1] Meanwhile a child should be slowly introduced to new structured habits, while you are not disciplining a child for his/her mistakes, but coaching him/her to consider the consequences of these mistakes in the future. You continue to apply social and sensory rewards. The same analogy can be drawn for an adult. The only difference is that an adult has to become his/her own parent.In ADHD personal discipline is developed through approval, respect, positive social contact, non-reactionary communication, calm guidance without imposed time limits for success and healthy sensory rewards. This is also why a therapy that is guided by these principles works.Developing a discipline is also related to the concept of implicit learning that people with ADHD are good at in general. Check my answer on implicit learning here: What are some implicit learning techniques?Thank you for A2A Benjamin Freitag!Footnotes[1] Psychotherapy & Neuroscience " Social Reward
Discipline for adhd, conduct disorder child?
What types of discipline do you recommend for a 7th grader with ADHD, mood/conduct disorder and depression at school? He is constantly being sent to ISS, in school suspension, and it has no thelped. He does things like not taking materials to class, not staying on task, being direspectful to teachers. The direspect is usually not severe..things like saying I don't want to, leave me alone, etc. Please help I am out of answers. We have grounded him at home, taken away the xbox, not let hiim watch tv, etc. It doesn't help with his behavior at school. He always says he didn't do it and it is not his fault. Then he says everyone hates him. He is in special education but goes to his normal classes.
How do I discipline my ADHD pre-teen?
With love and logic and understanding. ADHD, on the one hand, needs to be understood. A child needs structure, clear, consistent consequences, and as little blame and shame as possible. The child would love to make better choices but only figures that out after the fact. And, ADHD kids can make dangerous choices as they get older. So, it is important to stay in a healthy open relationship with them so that they will trust you.Make sure consequences are based on choices they had control over not struggles they can't handle yet. For instance if a child has poor grades, rather than consequences assume executive functioning is weak and sort out the issue and provide structure. For instance, is the student doing the work and losing it? Just nnot turning it in, losing the instructions, forgetting what was assigned, not tracking assignments in a planner, not getting home with the needed supplies? All of these are executive functioning.If you ask a child with ADHD if they finished their work,they will say yes no matter the truth. Make them show you what they have done, when consequences are given they need to be done calmly, not in anger. Always assume they are doing their best and that your structure and consistency are part of what they need in order to succeed.Pre-teens are going through changes and children with ADHD can struggle with emotional control. They are prone to anger. Stay calm. Assume they are doing their best. When they calm, then go over a better plan of interaction. Role play it. Really. It is the practice that changes the pattern for kids with ADHD, not just the knowledge. Because they act before they think, the struggle is to implement new habits. That is where the support needs to be. Once something is a habit, it is much more likely to happen.
How can an ADHD-ish person improve self-discipline?
I don’t know what ADHD-ish means. I’ve worked with dozens of people that were diagnosed with ADHD, and ALL of them acted exactly the same way. But if I explained the specifics of their actions, it would take hours, and it might bias your own symptoms so that you interpret them as having or not having ADHD. Here’s some things that have worked: Michael Phelps, the Olympic swimmer gold medal winner and world record holder claims that after exercising in the mornings, his focus improved and he didn’t need to take medication (or reduced medication) for his ADHD. You will notice if you see any videos from his Olympic performances that he always had earbuds on prior to his races; I don’t know what he listened to, but That may be a factor as well. Then, there is medication for ADHD. Contrary to what many laypersons say, medication has been shown to have the best results. In addition, medication for ADHD has been around for 80 years, and has proven to be very safe, safer than aspirin in fact. There is no evidence that it is harmful in anyway, when used correctly.
Do you think lack of discipline could contribute to children developing ADHD?
Nope. Children don’t “develop” ADHD. Either they have it, or they don’t. They are born with it.All children need some level of consistent discipline, and children that don’t get any at all suffer repercussions as a result for many years to come in their life. For children who have ADHD, a lack of structure and consistent discipline will amplify their ADHD as it’s equal to allowing a child to run wild because there are no limits for them. ADHD kids need to know what the program is, what they can expect and what will happen. They need attention, they need to be reminded and they need any kind of discipline in a very loving and caring manner. When they are being told what they did wrong, they also need to be told what they could’ve done differently that would’ve been right. You cannot have loopholes, you cannot be vague and you cannot assume that they will figure out the obvious. They won’t.
Is this the right way to discipline a child? My husband thinks it is.?
I need help. I fight with my husband all of the time in regards to my child, his stepson. I have raised my son for the last 8 yrs on my on. He has ADHD. He believes its a discipline problem not ADHD. He doesn't understand. My son is 9 going to be 10 and he makes him do tasks that I believe is actually for adults to do. My husband is a landscaper and after he is done with a job his truck is full of debris. he makes my son go out there and clean out his truck. when he says he can't, he forces him to do it verbally. He may call him names or just make him stay out there until he does it no matter how much he cries. I don't feel it is right. He doesn't spend time with him only when he wants something done for him. He believes child need responsiblity like adults have and he is trying to raise my son the way he is. I think that is wrong. Can someone tell my husband something. He doesn't listen to me. Everyone tells him what he does is wrong but he thinks it right. HELP!
How to discipline children with adhd without spanking?
My brother has adhd too, and I had it as a child also. It's difficult, but you need to prove that you are above your children as the Law and the Parent--without physical abuse. This requires a lot of intelligent planning and patience of course, but a perfect parent already knows this. You need to make them believe that no matter what they do that is bad, it will not work on your nerves--EVER. You need to talk to them in a firm and strict tone when they misbehave, but also reward them when they do something nicely or well, and encourage them to be better. This is very crucial in the discipline of adhd children because with this disorder, they tend to be easily discouraged, keep that in mind--it's part of the disorder. So don't put them down too much, because they will start to ignore you. Make them believe that you are a good person, but at the same time be aware of your own power over them as children, and make them aware of it as well. Good luck!
What's the best way to punish a child with ADHD?
My son has ADHD and is very active but not out of control by any means. I did have some trouble with him when he was on a stimulate medicine though. He started to get defiant and do thing he knew where wrong and became angry very easily. Needless to say he was not on that medication very long. I would strongly suggest you talk to his doctor about his behavior. And I also suggest you not allow him to get away with it and should be punished for acting out. He know right from wrong and ADHD is not an excuse for bad behaviour, just more energy and harder for them to focus.