How do I politely end this friendship?
I've been friends with a guy since I was 11 (I am now 15), at first I became friends with him because I had some pity on him, because he had no friends in the school. I really enjoyed being his friend until around 3 months ago. We had a lot of things in common, and we both had similar personalities. But now 4 years later, I find myself not satisfied with him. I've grown up a lot over the past while, and he hasn't. I've always filtered the topics I talked to him about, but my interests have changed so besides one or two things, we don't have much in common anymore. He only ever brings up one topic, and that is video games, I played them a lot before, but now I've discovered many more things in life. He still acts immature, because he constantly teases me, calling me poor, fat, or stupid, even though I have told him a few times to stop. I've tried bringing up more in-depth topics, ones that I need a real friend to talk to about, but we somehow always end up back onto Video Games. He gets really defensive, always asking for reassurance that he's my best friend, and he asks me to hang out practically every day. I've stayed his friend for these past few months, because he doesn't really have anyone else, but I'm getting me stressed out, having to make excuses as to why I don't want to talk or hang out with him. It kind of hurts me to say goodbye to such an old friend, but I think I know our time is up.
How do you politely tell a friend to stop being so depressing?
Tell her you're not a counselor and that you could help her find a good one. Tell her that you feel powerless to help (even if you don't because at this point you really are powerless if she's not taking your advice in how to handle her problems) and that you'd like her to get some help. Just keep saying that until she listens. Tell her you don't have answers for her except for her to see a professional. If she stops seeing you as a counselor and just a friend, this may help. You may also decide to change the relationship that you currently have. Right now, it sounds like you're a sounding board and it's just going to continue. Instead, call her up and suggest going to a movie, a local theatre play and tell her you want to have fun because life is too short to be dwelling on the negative. When I have encountered and befriended people who are seriously negative--I always ask them if they can tell me something they consider a postive. I try to refocus them on what they can learn from a particular situation or how they can "count their blessings" in this life. Everyone has negative stuff that happens, but it's those who can take that and make it positive that are inspiring. I find that many people are in a vicious cycle of drama and they're addicted to the chaos of their own lives. They don't yet see how they help to create the very environment they claim to dislike. If there is a way you can point this out, the very realization that she's addicted to chaos may help her. Other than that, you may just need to distance yourself from her problems before they become yours.
So your receiving pressure to engage in an activity you dont want to engage in? Well that can't be right.. I was under the impression that we were supposed to be tolerant of people and there life choices at this day and age?If you tried to make one of your friends feel bad for partying would you not be called intolerant? Judgemental? A prude?The respect should go both ways. If you don't want to engage in the stereotypical “college experience” no one should pressure you to do otherwise. If you enjoy being at your dorm and reading a book that is your right, or maybe watch a movie. Maybe you enjoy a nice conversation over the thumping of music in a large crowd.You have the ability to define your experience throughout college. So if someone starts imposing their viewpoint on you I would politely say “I understand your feelings. I'm sure your intentions are good and you just don't want me to miss out on enjoying my youth. That being said… I am enjoying my youth, the way I want to, and would appreciate your support as my (friend, father, mother, etc)”The same tolerance your expected to display, you should receive.
Part of my humor is sarcastic & it’s a form I appreciate. However, I’m not that way all of the time. Only with people who I know can take & understand it. Even then, only sometimes. I’m sure there must be times that you’re not playing around. There must be subjects that you discuss that are of concern. Something of a political or current event issue, perhaps. I’m sure he doesn’t think you’re goofing then.Have you inquired about his wife & family & made a joke about it? If so, then I can I understand if he might wonder. It sounds like you care about about his family & he needs to know that. If you’ve been friends for awhile, he should probably be able to tell when you’re sarcastic & when you’re serious. If you’re the latter more often, especially, about his family, he will come to believe your sincerity.
How do I politely tell my friend, "its my idea, get your own!"?
How do I politely tell my friend, "its my idea, get your own!"? I'm hoping to get some advice today because its really weighing on me at the moment... I have had a jewlery making idea for about two years and have finally bought all the tools to start making them recently. A friend of mine saw one of my pieces today and asked me about how I made it and if I made one for her, how would i do it. So I told her and she asked to see my tools etc. I told her that it was an idea i've had for a few years and im really looking forward to begin making them and selling them. She sent me a text message about 4 hours later to ask for the website that I bought my tools from! How do I tell her that this is my idea and its very special to me and I don't want her to do it. Its like I took years to think up of this idea and she has just swooped in and stolen it! I'm so upset about it, I don't want to seem selfish but its a really unique idea and everyone knows its hard to think of a unique idea and i can't just pull another unique idea out of my butt! and instead of her spending years thinking up a great idea of her own, she had decided she wants to steal MY idea! i can't help but feel so annoyed about this. How do I tell her in a nice way that I don't want her to do it and its my idea? she's not a close friend, i rarely see her these days so i don't really want to collaborate with her. And its not cheap to buy the tools and materials its about $500 to get started (and she knows that because i told her) so its not just a hobby its something you do to make money. and i don't want to be competing with a friend out there that has taken my idea (because she's not creative enough to think up her own idea) and wants to make money out of it! its so unfair! and someone said maybe she is inspired by my idea, she actually told me about her own ideas about making other things (not the best ideas but they were her own ideas) but now wants to take my idea! is it wrong of me to feel so angry about this? and how do i tell her that its my idea and i don't want to give her the website address because this is what i've wanted to do for two years and i don't want her to benefit from MY idea?
Polite ways to tell someone to mind their business?
They're getting close, but still smack of rudeness. Deflecting is a good way to handle it, since we don't answer questions just because they're asked. Example: "How much money do you make?" could be answered with "Oh, you know, enough." and a change of subject. "Are you pregnant?" could be answered with "I beg your pardon." as a flat, chilly statement accompanied by a hard stare. "Is that your real hair color?" could be answered with "Thank you!" These answers don't have to make sense, but they do, especially "thank you" carry the meaning of "you should not have asked that and I'm not going to answer it." and stops that line of inquiry right there, which is the point. Thanking someone for ANY remark about your personal stuff makes them wonder how you can construe it as a compliment. The sharper ones will realize that you don't like that they asked it and back off.
How to politely tell friend....?
If her mother doesn't have a car, or if she doesn't have another way to get to her games/events, make sure you tell her she won't be able to ride with you this year BEFORE she signs up for anything. If she will be unable to get to practices without your help, she should know that before hand, so that she can choose not to sign up (and waste money). If you're mid-season right now, consider waiting until right before sign-ups for next season. Let her know that she may need to reconsider signing up this time around, because you won't be able to give her rides anymore. Blame it on your mom's annoyance, if you need to (it's being honest, after all). Just remember this is your self-claimed best friend you're talking about (in your first sentence). Telling her you no longer want to give her rides may end the friendship. Do you want her to stay home while you're at practice? Or is her friendship worth the annoyance? Also, think of it from her perspective. If your mom suddenly lost the ability to drive you for some reason, would you be willing to not participate in sports anymore? Or would you hope to find a friend to get you there? Just something to think about... ~Kyanna
I was once on a long flight and had a nice woman sitting next to me. We chatted a bit and out of the clear blue sky (it was a flight after all) she asked me what kind of underwear I preferred. It was odd because, while she was pleasant to talk to, I had given her no flirtatious signals at all. Similarly, she didn't seem to be inviting me to join the mile high club with her. We had talked about favorite music, foods and movies and her curiosity apparently took a turn for the more personal. So, I smiled and gently replied “Why do you ask?” She blushed a bit, which I found charming, and she clearly realized she had gone a bit too far. A little stammering before she said “Sorry, I was just curious.” I grinned as broadly as I could and leaned a little closer, and then said quietly “And so you shall remain…”. We both had a good laugh, clinked our wine glasses to toast “boundaries”, and proceeded to change the subject. There wasn't a hint of awkwardness afterward.I haven't had the occasion to use that line again, but it was a very inoffensive way to deflect a personal inquiry. Try it.
How do I politely ask my sister to back off?
You should let her know what you stated here, that after long hours of work, you would like to stay at home with your baby for some alone time, since you feel you need to bond. Let her know that she can see him occasionally, but try to ask if it be more of an every other week basis, as you are recently married and need some time with that side of your family too. I think you are somewhat right in the respect that yes, she really wanted to have a family, and she may be living vicariously thorough you, but I dont think she's jealous, she just really loves you and your son. I would not tell her about the arguing it has caused between you and your husband, as it may cause her to become defensive, and maybe even a little resentful of him; so leave that out of any discussion. If you can, try to go out with her with a group of friends so she can get to develop friendships with other people, and if possible, you may try to set her up with a nice single guy if you know of any, just to take up some of her attention. I really hope it works out for you, but just dont say anything that would cause a riff between your relationship, as good sisters are hard to come by.
How can i make neighbour mind his own business?
I am like a prisoner in my own home. He comes outside everytime we are out there even stops us and tells us to turn the lawnmower off so he can talk to us/ask personal questions, has put his patio chairs right next to our patio or faces his chair to look right into our sunroom. Last spring I had to paint the outside of the house, he pulled up a chair and wathced the whole time! (wierd, who does that?) I swear if he as much as hears our door open he somehow positions himself outside front or back yard, directly in our path. Then the hot tub . . . she will be in the hot tub and when my husband pulls up in our driveway getting home from work she immediately stands up out of the hot tub in her bathing suit or underwear (yes) and pretends to be fixing the lid or something on the deck . . . like why wouldn't you just stay 2 more seconds in the hot tub until he gets out of his car and goes inside. We are selling our house. . . He has told one guy that there's water problems in our area--which there are absolutely NOT! I confronted him about this and he said he never said that but then did say sorry. . . they position themselves outside when someone comes to look at the house . . etc. No wonder this house hasn't sold! He's constantly asking questions and I swear maybe he wants to start a fight or something but we have been so accommodating to his every request that he can't. I really had hoped our house would have sold before another spring/summer with work outside etc. one example of his annoying antics: we paid $100 last year to spray a little spot of creeping charlie (weed) in the lawn between us and him that he insisted we treat. What do you do when you want people to stay away from you and mind their own businsess. We don't want to start World War 3 or anything, just want some privacy! My sister said to just absolutely ignore him when he tries to talk to me and he will get the idea, but I don't want to be that rude . . . Ideally I want to just give a 'hello' and a wave and be able to go about my business/yard work etc uninterrupted. Suggestions?