How do I get friends to pay me back the money I loaned them?
I have long had the personal policy of never lending money to friends. When it is not paid back, or not paid back on schedule, it can harm and even destroy a friendship.Not too long ago, I loaned some money to a friend who was moving. I know I was breaking my rule about loaning, thereby putting my own money and my friendship at risk.It was supposed to be paid back in a week. After some nagging, I got back half after three months. I could have let the balance slide. But as a friend, I continued to gently ask for the money. Why? It was important that my friend stay in integrity. But not paying back the money, by being let off the hook, my friend, and thus our relationship, would be out of integrity. Eventually the balance was repaid, and we have maintained our friendship. Being in integrity with all of your relationships, be they personal or professional, is incredibly important. As the loaner to the recipient, you have the opportunity and obligation to keep that relationship in integrity. It is a growth opportunity for both parties.And yes, I am back to my no-loan policy... Edit: another answer suggested that someone who doesn't pay back a loan be dismissed as not a real friend. Well, we all have our gifts and flaws. This friend I loaned to is always the first person to volunteer to help move or carry something heavy or get up early to assist. I wouldn't so casually dismiss a long friendship due to a loan. Instead, look at where you can take responsibility for creating the best possible outcome for everyone involved.
What is a polite way to remind someone that they owe you money?
You know I have a hard time with that concept also. Am I the only one who thinks that you should pay someone back without asking? It makes me feel funny when I have to do that, and most of the time when you ask for it back they catch an attitude. Too much drama over 20 bucks. I would rather take the loss and learn from the lesson than to put myself through some unnecessary drama like that. That is small stuff to a giant. I feel like I got out cheap. My suggestion to you is ask them for your money and explain that you shouldn't have to ask for your money back and if you have to ask again than the loaning money business is shut down. My opinion with people like that is they don't have any respect for you and they was really hoping you would forget about it because they wasn't gonna pay you back anyway. I would ask once and only once.If it is friend stop loaning money because money will ruin the best of friendships.
How to politely remind someone they need to pay you?
I work two jobs, one of which is babysitting, I recently babysat for someone and she usually paypals me as payment. This was Saturday and she still hasn't paypaled me. I am sure she just forgot and there was no malicious intent. She asked me to babysit again a couple days ago but I was unable to, you'd think that she would have thought to pay me then. Anyways, what's a nice way to remind her to pay me without flat out asking for it? I plan to do it via text. One time I asked if I forgot my debit card at her house (I am notorious for that) but I can't use that trick again.
What is the right way to ask someone for your money back without being rude?
Dear SabahThank you for your question to me !Tell them your require it for an urgent expenseTell them your require it for some medical emergency …some shortfall at home that is critical …Take care of the essence…the subject of rudeness will disappearStay Blessed !
What would you do if your friends didn’t give back what they borrowed from you?
That depends on what it is that they borrowed and how much it is worth to me. You see: Often people forget that they borrowed something from you. Especially if you're not asking for it for a longer period of time. It's no bad will from their side. They might just be a bit careless or thoughtless or just plain forgetful. It happens all the time. It might even have happened to you. ;)Those of your friends who value proper conduct greatly will bring back anything in due time. You'll never have to ask them.But some of your friends might be a bit negligent. Then it is your duty to remind them that you want it back. If they won't give it back to you after several times of due notice, then it will be for you to decide how to react to this. If it is something dear to me, then I would visit them at their place and lay my hands on it, declaring that I'm taking it back NOW. If that person knows what's good for her she will not stand in my way. S/he will thank me for having lent me this and let me go with gratitude. If the person thinks she can prevent me from going away with my stuff, then that person will have to give me very good reasons for that and beg me dearly -otherwise I will just move on out. Usually I expect some gratitude after having borrowed something to someone else. If I perceive that such gratitude is not expressed then I can properly conclude that this "friend" is NOT a real friend but someone who has used my acquaintance as an advantage to him/herself. THAT would then be the reason for me to expel him/her out of my universe and not think of him/her as my friend anymore.
Someone owes me money, but are ignoring me and not answering my messages. What can I do?
From you post, it sounds like this is a friend of yours. I think the public shaming idea is NOT a great idea. This is why there are so many warnings against the friends and family loan. My suggestion is that if the amount is not very high, it may be best to forgive and forget the loan. Consider this the price for learning an important life lesson. If the loan is a lot of money, I would suggest looking into your legal rights to collect your loan. It will be good if you have something in writing to show the nature of the loan and expectation of payback.Money can create lots of friction in relationships, and some best practices for a loan request are: learn how to politely decline,loan and be prepared to forgive the loan, orhave the loan agreement legally binding and be prepared to lose a friend.Here is what a "decline" conversation might look like. "As much as I'd like to help you, I don't feel comfortable in loaning you the money. I have had bad experiences with this in the past where my friend was not able to pay me back a loan. It made our relationship awkward, and ultimately it ended badly. I value you as a friend, and hope you understand."
How can I ask for my money back from a friend without being rude?
It's not rude to ask a friend to settle a debt. Use polite language, don't be accusatory and let them know that you appreciate their friendship."I feel uncomfortable about our outstanding debt, and I don't want it to become an issue. Would it be possible to settle it soon? Thanks for understanding."That's particularly soft (especially "our debt") but fairly firm. You can choose to be more direct without being rude: "Remember that $X I lent you for Y? I don't mean to nag, but I could really use it back."
What can I do if someone won't pay their share of the bill?
Me and my friend share a family line which we agreed to. Everything is under my name. We are under a 2 year contract, and his line ends in Oct 2011 while mine ends this July 2011. We usually take turns paying each month but he stopped just last December 2010. My friend owes me like 3 months of phone service. He moved to away a while ago and I do not know his exact whereabouts. I have his 2 numbers to reach him at. But he won't answer my calls and prefers texting me about the situation. Now he won't straight up text or pick up my calls and he knows as well as me he needs to pay up. He went out of his way to delete me off facebook as well. Obviously hes trying hard to avoid me. The other day I called his phone as a unknown called he picked up. He gave me this excuse he was working and couldn't talk right now and hung up on me. I plan on giving him another surprise call soon but I need to know what can I do. Like if I should hire a attorney over just a couple months of phone bills or something. Phone bill is almost due and I'm not like the wealthiest guy around, especially in this economy. Additional note: Back last summer, without my permission as owner of the phone lines, my friend impersonated me at the phone store and added another line to our phone bill which, since then, our bill has gotten more pricier. I found out about a day later after i looked at the bill online, talked to him about and i wasnt pleased at all whatsoever but he told me would pay the additional and i said okay then and he did cover the additional costs for awhile. Though now im looking at 3 lines on contracts all separate, 1 including mines.
How do you politely ask someone to return something that you gave them?
Go over to their house with pepper spray in your back pocket, bring a guy with you in the car.Leave the engine turned on, and the car a while away, so they don’t see the car.And ask to hangout for a bit, while you guys are laughing ask them for the thing.If they give it to you without hassle, yay!If they provide hassle, you have protection and a friend to come and help if you find yourself somewhat dead or something. :/Use the pepper spray if they get physical, but yell it out that you have it when you already have it out and say that you will use it if they seem to harm you in any way. You just want the thing.After you get it, thank them and leave. yay?
Should I call to remind him of our date or just sit back and wait?
A very popular guy who is on a business trip (he's in the entertainment industry) asked me out 2 weeks ago for a date this coming week. I haven't heard from him since and he probably has tons of girls chasing him. Should I call to confirm it or should I sit back and be patient? I don't want him to think I am not as into him as other women who would probably be calling him nonstop if they had his number so I don't know what to do! I realize there's the possibility that he might not be that into me, but taken he took the time to call me while he was away tells me at least there's some interest which I'll take.