My friends are really annoying me?
I have one friend who is very insecure and likes to talk about people behind their back, and then I have another friend that is way too secure and thinks that everyone loves her. My first friend is always calling herself the ugly duckling and making pitying remarks like that. I tell her she's pretty but she just disregards it and starts insulting me and talking about other people. Once, she told me that I should never shave my head because I wouldn't even be pretty if I shaved my head. This was very random and strange, and honestly it hurt me. My other friend is very bossy and very social. Now that we are freshman in highschool, she thinks that she is really popular. She's always saying hi to guys and being like 'so and so is my best friend.' I'm glad she is making new friends, but the other day she said that one of my guy best friends was her best friend, and then she's said "I'm like best friends with everyone!" and then giggled. I know for a fact she hated this kid last year and was really mean to him, but is all of a sudden best friends. Plus, she is always taking things that I say and directly saying them to other people. Like when I'm not around, she will repeat my joke that I told to her, and then I will hear about how it was so funny by these other people. I try not to let it get to me, but she is driving me nuts (she is a good person but she has some personality issues). I just feel like I attract really bad friends because a lot of my friends are like this, and I just want a drama-free life. Both of my friends are very self-absorbed and are always talking about really shallow things like who is going out with whom and their problems. I am a quiet person, and I only have about 5 close friends. I love all of them dearly despite their flaws, but It is really starting to take its toll.
I have a problem I want to tell my guy friend about, but I'm afraid he will get annoyed if I cry. What should I do?
Here's my advice...it won't be easy.I can see that you really want to spill the whole thing to him. But I suggest you start by telling him just a little bit about the problem. In other words, test the waters. See if you tell him a little bit about the problem, if he isn't freaked out by your problems.Please do realize that one of the reasons people turn the tables, is because stories beget stories. If you tell something private about yourself, but then stop short, the person you are talking to is likely to share a similarly private story about themselves, and fill the space.If you are a caring person, you might feel like you then are supposed to pay attention to their story. And normal people like it when others pay attention to their stories, so they may not even realize that your story was a big deal.You need to be willing to focus on yourself. If you start to talk about yourself, and your problems, and then stop, people won't want to ask you questions, they may be afraid to pry. So they show you that they are happy for you to be emotionally intimate, and share their story.If that happens, say something like, "Yah, we all have problems." And then tell them more about YOUR problem. Let them know you are not done. If you want their input, TELL them so.When you are always putting on a happy face, and always being the one who takes care of everyone else, you cannot expect them to know that you need care.Chances are that in your own home, you find that being upbeat keeps things running better. You've learned somehow that acting happy protects you.Now you want to be cared for, more than you want to be protected. But you are scared. So, tell him a little, and if he responds ok, tell him a little more. Bit by bit, he'll either get nervous and actively stop you from talking, or he will not. Just pay attention to your own part in this. If you stop, and he shares his own story, it isn't necessarily him turning the tables...just offering his own story to match yours, to show you that he accepts your level of emotional intimacy.Good luck. And if you find it too hard to talk with your friend, you might consider trying to talk with a therapist of some sort. Sounds like you do need some support.
MY FRIEND IS ANNOYING ME to DEATH! HELP?!
Ok my friend copies me, I know its complamiting but she wont stop and when I confront her she says no way, its just me. Like I was punk, suddenly she went *preppy* punk, doesn't excit I know. Then I went scene girl, suddenly she said she was scene, and now I'm emo & I'm waiting for her 2 be too. She always complanes about my other friend cuz we had a big fight but we're friends again, but I'm like whatever I'm so sick, I confronted her and she said ur mean, and shes like the rich girl that gets everything she wants, and I got in trouble cuz of her lil winey I want everything additude, and it also bugs me cuz her parents are like her lil dummy's! UGH HELP?!!
My friends always puts herself down, and it is getting annyoing...... what should i say to her?
why she constantly does this? option 1. shes doing this for attention. option 2. she really feels bad about herself. but in either case, just let her know that its not the end of the world. im sure if she eats a pack of m&ms its not gonna make her gain 10 pounds, and like you said: cheerleading is not the world! some peoples lives are way worse and they have real problems- not just, i cant tumble, my life sucks. just help cheer her up and compliment her jumps or say 'you look really good in that shirt' or whatever. just something to make her feel better about herself. and just tell her that she shouldnt think of herself that way and that shes not fat and who cares if she cant jump or tumble the best? all she can do is her best.
Friend is always depressed and complaining?
Yea, I know what you mean. I mean seriously, let you friend understand that you that their are people in the world who dig in dumpsters to try to find enough food to eat to survive another day or there are people that are beaten on a daily basis, Their are children that come home to drug addicts and alcoholic parents who don't love them and abuse them. We all get annoyed and depressed with life sometimes but, your life could be much worse. I'm sorry that you have to deal with a friend like that. I have to deal with a lot of girls that behave like that too. Sometimes however friends mimic their parents behavior she might have a mother or father that likes to complain that is where she gets it from.. idk but, maybe she will never chance some people are like that.
What to do about a friend ALWAYS asking for money?
She is not a friend of yours. She sees you as her cash cow. Don't let her use you. What about if you have problems and you need $$, would she lend you some????? I don't think so. She would say no. Plus, if it really annoys you, tell her that you are not her bank or money lender. Don't let yourself be used. ps: Get a new friend
An annoying military wife friend HELP?
I have a friend whose husband came home from Iraq a few months ago. She is now pregnant and wants him out of the military. He was in a few accidents in Iraq and now has back and neck problems. She told me she gave him 2 options get out of the Army or re-enlist and restation (she thinks if he re-enlists he won't go overseas anymore since he got hurt but my hubby got hurt overseas and they sent him again anyway). She said if he ends up overseas again she will cheat on him and possibly divorce him (which is wrong as hell for her to even say). If she has to stay at their current post she is moving back home to be with her mom because she doesn't want to raise her baby here (because while her hubby was gone she screwed up a few times and doesn't want to end up facing her problems again). What can I say to make her shut up to me about all this? My hubby doesn't want me around her but she doesn't respect that. I have told her things but she keeps going on and bad mouths my hubby and me. Help!
Why do I always feel like I am annoying someone every time I talk to them?
May I ask a couple of question? If it's ok. Reason I want to ask is because I used to see the disinterested looks in conversations or rolling of the eyes, then I would get nervous I was losing them and say silly things.So I ask, in your conversations do you dominate the conversatio?Are you a humble listener?The annoyance you feel, is that immediately or comes later on in the conversation?I answered yes, no, yes, to the above. So I took a class in ‘'Inclusive Leadership Skills.’ I found I was so happy with all my ‘knowledge’ to be include that I dominated the whole conversation and beyond.I wasn't a humble listener, i would catch only bits and pieces because I was already thinking of something else to say as soon as they stopped talking.Replay some of your conversations in your mind, and ask yourself those questions. If you are none of the above it wouldn't hurt to ask humbly if your annoying them, get some honest feedback and go from there.Someone told me something once that made me think, they said “Everybody doesn't think like you.” Not in a harsh way, but in a complimentry sense.