I want to work but the thought of leaving my children with a nanny or in daycare scares me. What should I do?
If you can afford it, plan for a practice week. Hire a nanny for 5 days, install a nanny cam, and leave the house all day, going to job interviews, doing errands, having lunch with friends, or just visiting people. Prepare the kids by talking about it quite a bit.Keep in mind that the children will be adapting during those days, so you will see it at it’s newest, or ‘worst,’ if they miss you. If you can arrange one of the days to be a ‘trial day’ at a daycare, that’s even better.
Guilty about leaving my mom alone and moving abroad?
It is completely normal dear, that guilt is coming out of love for your mom . we all are very deeply attached to our parents especially moms because when no one was there mom was. When it all went wrong mom hugged and pain went away. Thats what moms are - a cure for every pain and leaving mom miles away is gravely painful .But honey listen, you are doing this to make a life , to become something and your mom wants nothing more than to see her child , her only child happy and thriving in a land thats not even her's at the first place. You are courageous , you have the valor to fly overseas and make a name of your own . Be proud of this, be proud of yourself .Now here is what you do to make your mom feel even closer - you said you call her once , call her twice, it may not be very easy or feasible but try . call your mom twice . And when you talk to her make her laugh , listen to her laughter everyday , this will pour life into her and into you . Meanwhile you work harder than ever to get a job that pays well maybe you’ll be able to bring her with you !Who says you have to be sad or break down on the idea of your mom away,don't let her feel that you are away and same goes for you. Encourage her to engage herself in something she really likes, for example moms love to make stuff like home stuff and all ,so tell her to engage herself in some hobby and ask her to talk to people , have a little mom circle.Relax! things will work out for the best.
Anyone feel guilty about having to take time off work for doctor appointments?
I did/do feel the same way. I assume you are pregnant. I just told myself that my baby comes first. And you work does understand, I am sure they don't mind, you are obviously a good employee and don't abuse the system. I had to be on bed rest my last month of pregnancy, I felt horribly guilty, but I would never risk my baby's health, EVER. Always remember, you are a good employee and your child should always alwasy always come first regarding health especially. You will be missing work to take your baby/child to the doctor for a very long time. And you'll miss work when your child is sick. It is just a part of being a parent. Don't abuse it and you'll be fine.
How do you feel about putting your baby in daycare?? Do you think its wrong?? Do you trust daycare facilities?
You can never ever truly trust a daycare. I had to put my first child in daycare for 8 months (I stayed off 2, then my mom is a teacher so she was out for 2.5 and then my child went to daycare and stayed there til I quit working when she was 1) Soooo..... First of all, I made it a point to NEVER lack at making up for the lost time during the day even though it meant I was seriously exhausted at work on a daily basis. But who cares? my child was more important. About daycares, I had her in 3 different ones. One time they called me, it was Nov and cold out, and said her diaper leaked and they couldnt find her extra clothes, I said give me an hour, I will leave work, grab an outfit at the store and be there. I immediately left, bought the outfit and was there in 25min. I walked in to her laying in the bed, no blanket on and her bottle was propped up while she cried for it bc it had fallen from her mouth and the workers were just chillin. Momma was angry. (FYI - never ever bottle prop it causes ear infections) . Another daycare I took her to, I informed them that monday morning at 8am that she had been on an antibiotic, Omnicef, and for some reason it made her poop not smell at all. She was perfectly fine when I dropped her off, I always kept a tub of aquaphor in her bag, which I had instructed them to use EVERY diaper change. When I picked her up at 4:15pm she was BLISTERED and BLEEDING. While i agree she did have sensitive skin, that doesnt happen unless she had sat in poop all freaking day. She never went back. I too suggest using a stay at home mom, but if you have to do daycare make sure you trick them. Say ok I will see you at 6! and then show up at 4. Tell them that you will be there at 4 and take a half day at work and show up at lunch. Count your diapers, keep an inventory of your foods, ect. AND MOST IMPORTANTLY, tell them that your baby is SEVERELY ALLERGIC TO BENEDRYL. Too much can kill a baby, and daycare workers are not properly trained to dose it, but many will use it to put a baby to sleep so their day is easy.
Single Mom Working Full Time & Going To School?....?
I'm in the same boat. Single mom, working full time, going to school full time (for the next 2 yrs), no child support,ect. My daughter is 8months and goes to daycare. It's hard but it is definetly worth it. You are making a better life for you and your child always remember that. It is WAY easier to do it while they are young. Think of it like this is just a couple years she'll be in to ballet, swimming, soccer, or karate and she'll want you there for support. Once they get older they reach out to do more things but still at a young age they want you there. You'd be much better off doing it now (or that's how I see it). I know it's rough too not seeing them all the time. You WON'T "miss" the baby stuff. Though you spend a lot of time away you still get to experience her learning and growing. She will ALWAYS know who mom is no matter your schedule. As long as you make time for her as often as you can everything will be fine. I like to at least 1 day off spend the whole day with my daughter... no errands, no friends, just me and her doing well.. whatever!! Hope this is a bit of encouragement that you can do it!
What excuse(s) have you used to leave work early?
At my previous employer, I was so worn out after we had completed a really grueling project that I called in the day after completion and I told them flat out that I was not in the mood to work and would be back to work on Monday.
I am working mother, and have a one and half year old baby. Sometimes, I feel too guilty that I lam not taking proper care of my child but at same time due to financial pressure, cant leave job. What should I do?
If you look at the related questions to your in Quora, you will find yourself among hundreds of concerned parents like your kind self. Mother’s guilt is an innate trait that programmed you to be vigilant and caring about them.I am also a working single mother, and during the first months of leaving my baby in the childcare, the guilt had consumed me and I looked forward each day to beat the traffic and rush home to spend time with him.On the hind side, now my toddler is 4 years old, I think I could have been a bit more relaxed because when I asked him about times when he was a baby and showed him videos of him, he can’t remember them much.What he did remember, are times that we cuddle, and the routine bedtime storybook and lullabies. He has grown out from his pacifier but still wants the pats and cuddles before he sleeps. Day time activities not so much.So my recommendation is, remind yourself that you’re a strong woman. You are also a determined mommy to make sure that your child would have enough love, food and care. To achieve that you therefore need to work. Place a photo of your darling at your workplace to remind yourself that. You can also look out for jobs with better incentives, such as one with childcare, or nearer to home.Don’t feel bad. Be grateful that you have with you a little person, who brings you joy daily! Best of luck to you mommy!