Feeling guilty about affair and wife?
It is so easy to persecute you because you have cheated and no one likes a cheater and liar. I was the OW and wish this was the guy I was seeing saying this but know the whole situation is so messed up. I also felt that this man was my soul mate and your situation sounds exactly the same. Married for a long long time, no real marriage problems, not much in common with wife, nice person but more like a sister. He can not bring himself to leave his wife because of the hurt, guilt and family back lash that he would sustain from all the relatives. Its a big price to pay and he broke up with me in which I understand completely. First of all it was wrong for us to do what we did but for some reason we were drawn together and the connection was there and I am not talking sexual. You really need to be honest with yourself especially your wife that you have made a commitment to she deserves that. I don't know if staying with someone because of every reason but love is the thing to do but people do it everyday. I suppose that is why some people stay together and just go on living and some get divorced because the love is too strong for someone else. Whatever the case I can only say that I loved this man and hurt everyday that I am not with him but you have to end a relationship before you start a new one. I also believe that if I were truly was the one he loved then all those obstacles that you have said as he did would not stand in the way and he he would be with me right now. I believe he did me the favor of ending it because this was truly not the right thing to do and now I have the guilt of doing this to another woman. So you sir have to weigh it all and be honest and true to yourself and to the people who you share your life with. However, take into account that many lives would be changed, the hurt you will effect and that many times the grass is not greener on the other side. The outcome you chose will be a difficult one either way and its going to be a rough road ahead so be ready.
I had an affair with my uncle and I feel guilty?
Well I don't know how your family is going to react but this is a serious situation. Just imagine how your uncle's wife will feel, his children, how your dad will feel, what if your children find out? Could of you just tell him this isn't right and walk away? But I guess your stuck in this situation so here's my advice. Tell your family. Obviously he had more interest in you then you did with him and she shouldn't have made this sort of relationship between you too, he should know better but you could of tell him that you don't feel right, he is your uncle at the end of the day. So tell your family what has happened but do it in a formal manner, don't worry them and make them feel like you were raped as he is older, explain how your in the fault to so not all the blame in on your uncle. It's obvious you've both made a mistake, I bet the reason he isn't talking to you is because he's trying to get over what's happened and try to forget, but for the benefit of your future, make things right and tell someone in your family as they will find away to make things right whether that is to keep you and your uncle away from each other to accepting your mistake, you don't want to live in guilt for the rest of your life so take the weight of your chest.
No, I have not. People do what they want to do. Why feel guilty? Some pretend to feel guilty. Example: A True Story about a friend (she told me)a friend girl -that i know was messing around with this married guy and when he was tired of her- she told me he told her on a dinner date- You know i am a God sent man, and i am married with children, and i was looking at my wife last evening - and i wanted to cry. Ann , you know I go to church every Sunday with my family and i must tell you- Ann that I can’t do this anymore. I feel guilty .. God will hate me for adultery. I am a deacon in the church.I laughed at her. I said well i guess he has had enough of you the “cow” and “pudding” and now he going back home to his wife he tells you because he is failing as a church man. She did look like a used fool and discovered that she had been used. She said he called her the next day after that date and said-I won’t be back. You will be alright? keep me and I will keep you in prayer. She said she said ok. That’s why I will tell any lady- There are enough single guys in our beautiful world you can date.
The fact that you are asking this question suggests that you know the lack of guilt is “not usual” emotion or response to this behavior.You are thinking of what you “want”, what feels “good for you”. Children are very “me” focused too. They don't think of their brother or sister or whether there's money or time for what they want. They know only that they “want” that treat, that toy, that time for themselves.Good parenting helps children to develop patience, learn how to delay gratification and empathy for others. As they grow, develop and learn, children begin to understand cause and effect. Using a Cognitive Behavioral Therapy tool, ABC. (Activating Event-Belief-Consequence or Antecedent, Behavior, Consequence) may help. ABC is a therapeutic intervention tool that can help an individual examine attitudes, events, behaviors and beliefs.Cognitive understanding is a growth process. As this process unfolds, children learn deductive reasoning skills, critical thinking skills and learn to think beyond their own “wants”. My go-to parenting reminder to my children was “you're confusing “wants” and “needs” dear”.It may be time to work on increasing your cognitive skills if, in fact, you actually have no guilt feelings for the behavior you are engaged in. I suspect you know that already.
Mom had an affair... with my uncle!!?
You have to keep leaving her alone. If there's ANY hope for this relationship right now, it's only going to occur if you stop trying to cling to her and trap her. Read here https://tr.im/l4PaM If she sees you as a stalker, she feels that she cannot escape you. It's absolutely IMPOSSIBLE for her to value you and respect you when this is the case. There's a good chance it's too late already, but if there's even the smallest flicker of hope in her heart for you - you absolutely must stop sabatoging yourself like this! You need to drop off the map. Stop doing whatever you're doing. Stop trying to contact her. Yes, she will leave you alone too. Even if she does end up coming back to you, it will likely take the better part of a year before that happens. The reason for this is because she needs to develop a different opinion of you. She needs time to see that you're not the creepy, verbally abusive stalker that she had you pegged as. If she still cares, she will get in touch with you then. At that point, you may have gotten over her yourself. But either way, you need to stop trying to make something happen with your ex. This is something that you simply cannot control. Stop behaving out of desperation and let go.
I had an affair and I feel so consumed with guilt...how do you ever forgive yourself?
I've been dating someone for 3 years and we are engaged. In the past year I've had some personal difficulties. A family member died, among other things. My fiance was supportive with me through all of it, but I still didn't feel right. A few months ago, I met someone and almost from the beginning we started flirting. She, too, had lost a family member this year and I felt she understood me on that level and we began to have a very strong connection--talking on the phone into the night, texting, etc. A few weeks ago, she admitted to me that she liked me, and I admitted I felt a connection to her as well. My fiance sensed things and started getting jealous, but I would always tell her we were just friends. But me and the other girl started having an "emotional affair." I talked to her more than my fiance and feel a deep connection, but I knew it was wrong. We even discussed spending the night together once. I finally couldn't take the guilt anymore and told this girl we should take a break from seeing and talking to one another, because it just wasn't right. But I can't stop feeling guilty over all of this. My fiance was there for me through everything and she did nothing wrong. And I still entered into an emotional relationship with this other girl, and we even discussed having sex. I feel so horrible and the guilt is eating me up inside. For the past week I have been incredibly depressed. I can't get over the fact I allowed this to happen, and did this to someone I love. I want to confess to my fiance, but I know she will be heartbroken and I am so ashamed at what I did. The only consolation I keep telling myself is that we didn't sleep together, but it doesn't make the lying and open expression of feelings and talk of having sex okay. If anyone has ever been in a similar situation, or maybe actually did cheat physically, how do you learn to forgive yourself? I feel absolutely horrible. My fiance didn't deserve this.
Why i don't feel guilty about having an affair?
You didn't mention whether or not you were in love with the man you had an affair with. Have you ever had someone cheat on you? If no, is it possible that you just can't relate to the pain? If yes, is it possible that you consider this your "right" or "revenge"? Maybe it means something or nothing to you. It can shoot to either side. I think you should look outside of yourself and see yourself as someone else and find out if this is really you. I think realistically, you're just numb or maybe "in shock" for any of those reasons. You might want to start thinking about what's right for the both of you.
I think, by social standards and expectations, it appears there is a lack of conscience here and you really only care about yourself. If you are okay with that, then, well, it’s your life. Why should I impose my own views on you or anyone else, I say do as you can live with. If you can live with, or truly not care, that you are participating with someone to break his wedding promises, possibly hurting one or more people, affecting future events, etc, then do as you wish.Your question, though, sounds like you are questioning if you ARE really okay with it all, sans guilt. In time, it may turn out that you aren’t.Maybe you think a physical infidelity is acceptable if you aren’t “taking” from any place else, say funds, family holidays….etc. It is just sex and cuddle me coo coo shi coos. I could ask are you using protection each and everytime? If you are, I would say, hmm, maybe you are guilt-free, totally looking out for yourself re: stds, pregnancies.You certainly know more than we do about this man, and there may be a good reason that he chooses to get “affection and companionship” outside his marriage. But affection and companionship can also include emotions, and then this is also an emotional infidelity. Is there a difference to you?Only you can decide. I would argue a person who feels “absolutely no guilt” would not ask this question.
Feeling guilty- what should i do?
i recently had a hard patch in my marriage. My husband for moths has been showing absolutely no trust in me and started cutting me down like crazy. i have never given him cause to believe i have been unfaithful and never given him cause to cut me down as badly as he does as a parent or anything else but he always manages to do so each time he got upset. one night i was feeling so badly that i had an affair. not like it was some stranger i knew the person- but i feel so guilty- my husband agreed to go to marriage counseling with me but the problem is i want to tell him but i know he'll go nuts. I know what i did was not right- i won't try to justify it but i also don't need criticism for what i've done- i just need help with whether or not to tell him and how to tell him about it if it comes to that. please help- i hate feeling like this. it's not something i planned on nor is it something i am proud of. I have been feeling like we may have gotten married for all the wrong reasons. i know he loves me but loving him has been difficult. so please no judgments- just advice and opinions on how i should go about coming clean or if i even should...