I'm 21 and I Have No Social Life?
These are suppose to be my best years. The ones where I have great memory's with friends. Instead I just feel stuck and I've felt stuck since I was 16. I'm really not sure what I'm doing wrong. I make great first impressions since on the outside I look good. Then after a few minutes they start to see the real me, which is the insecure me and I probably start to look ugly after that. I'm just really shy and kind of awkward. I've been working on this problem for 5 years now. If there was such a thing I would definitely have at least a bachelors degree in self help books. Yea it definitely helped but ultimately I'm still not happy with myself. I almost feel like a waste of life. What do I do if I have no real passions in life, can't stay motivated for longer than ten days, and really want a social life?
I have NO social life.. 16 years old?
Not having a social life isn't a bad thing. At fifteen I dropped out of High School and began an online school at home because I was hanging around with the wrong people. I completely killed all ties with friends and for 3 years I had no social life to speak of. Slowly however I learned that the people I truly wanted to be around were those that were supporting of me, not the ones pressuring me to do things I wasn't comfortable doing. I started volunteering where you meet a lot of good people your age, and of all ages, who all have something good to offer. From there I met more and more people who instead of making my life worse, made it much better. Find a small church, animal shelter or group that does something and see if they need help. The people there are all nice, and many are very shy, but they will build your self esteem up like no one else will. And helping others will boost you up too. Learn to be happy by yourself too. I prefer to be alone a lot of the time and I know being alone is much better then being surrounded by those who are negative influences. The best of luck to you, just try not to be too hard on yourself, most of us have been where you are right now :)
I have no social life?
Your second paragraph leads me to believe that you might have Aspergers or some other kind of mild autism (or perhaps just social anxiety). I have a brother who used to tell me the same thing-- he was extraordinarily socially awkward in high school and overanalyzed every interaction he had with other people, but he was extremely smart (he went on to be an architect), likable and friendly, too. He had a mild form of autism that he eventually learned to deal with by practicing social cues and putting himself into new social situations (he joined a drama club, like you, and started going to poker nights and bible studies and all sorts of things). Eventually, in college, he made several close friends who were on par with him intellectually and understood how to relate to him. It just takes time! Don't try too hard to be friends with people unnaturally. If you're a friendly person, a genuine person, and an interesting person, other people will be drawn to you naturally. I bet you'll find this to be the case as you get older and go to college-- social dynamics just take time to master. Good luck!
How should I feel about having no social life?
The question should not be “How should I feel about having no social life?”, the question should be “How do I feel about having no social life?”.Do not let others dictate how you ought to feel. How you feel is real. Trying to adapt to what someone else thinks you should feel will not make your true feelings go away, it will only cause you to mask them. If you do this long enough, you could lose who you are.Now, to your question:There are many reasons to have a minimal social life. If it is something you want because you are focused on a goal or for some other reason that is important to you, then it is probably temporary and I would not worry too much about it.If you don’t socialize much because that is what you are comfortable with, that’s okay too. This type of person usually only has a few close friends that they trust and enjoy.If you don’t have much of a social life because you are shy, there is nothing wrong with that either, unless you feel that your shyness is hurting you in some way and you want to make a change.If you don’t have a social life for any reason, and you want to change that, examine that thought and make sure it is what you want and not what someone else wants for you. If it is what you want, then start making changes.First, decide what having a social life means to you. Most people looking from the outside would consider my life boring. Trust me, it is not. I don’t live the party life, because it holds no attraction to me. That is my choice. You need to decide for yourself, what you want.Once you have made that decision, start finding and associating with people of like mind, those with similar interests. You will develop friendships quite naturally when you take this approach. If you are trying to overcome shyness, it may take a little extra effort, but it will work.In this world, it needs to be said: A strong social media presence does not equal a social life. If you are trying to learn to be more social, do it face to face. Social media (like Quora for example) can add an interesting dimension to your life, but it will never successfully replace real, face-to-face interaction.I feel like I have rambled a bit, so I will summarize with this: Decide what you truly want for yourself socially and if it is different than what you currently have, make a plan to go out and get it.I hope this helps. Good luck.
I'm 15 and I have no social life. It's depressing me...?
Basically I've been putting up with this for over a year and need to talk to somebody before I fall apart. I know this question is long, but please- I need help. I'll start by saying I'm a 15 (16 in June) year old girl, sophmore in high school. I have just gotten over depression (over an unrelated topic) about two years ago. The problem is, I've drifted apart from every really close friend I've ever had in my entire life, to the point of not even acknowledging existence anymore. This wouldn't be so bad if I had other 'kind of' close friends that I could hang out with and develop a stronger relationship. But I don't. I have many "friends", or the more appropriate term could probably be "close acquaintances". But all these so-called friends already have their circles, and I can't explain it because it would be too long an explanation, but just take my word for it, there is no way I can just jump right into any of these really tight groups of best buddies. I'm so afraid that if people find out what really goes on in my life (or rather, what doesn't) I'll be thought of as an anti-social freak or something. Which I guess I am. On top of that, the only friends I've ever had in my whole life were girls, and I've never had a boyfriend or ever been asked out. I don't talk to guys because I'm so scared that every guy would never want a girl like me. It's hard to explain. In a way I feel like I'm missing out on my teenage years and all the fun things you can only do as a teenager and I'll regret this for the rest of my life. People tell me all the time how attractive they find me or how nice my clothes are but I'm not very confident at all...I was thinking about trying out for the dance team at school, but I'm afraid of embarrassing myself and I don't really have anyone to try out with. I know people who are trying out but they might ignore me. All year people have showed a lot of interest in me but I'm afriad to open up because my social skills kind of suck. Please give me some advice. Thanks for reading and caring.
I have no social life outside of school?
I'm pretty much homebound with no one to see and nothing to do ALL the time... I don't understand it. i have a small group of friends at school, and i guess you could say we're pretty close.. but they just blatantly exclude me in everything they do outside of school.. like they'll be making plans for the weekend and stuff in front of my face without even acknowledging that i'm right there. "let's go to the movies this weekend... i wonder who we should invite." it seriously hurts. by no means do I want to be really popular and constantly getting invited places, in fact i like spending alone time.. but i've just been incredibly bored lately and it's making me depressed. anyways I'm not asking for much. just using yahoo answers to vent my emotions under anonymity i suppose.
What should I do? No social life, strict parents...?
I need help. It's now summer and I'm just sitting at home (I'm a girl, by the way, haha).To be honest, I've dreaded the summertime and I really really miss school (I'll be a sophomore at high school next year). The reason for this is because I lack a social life... my friends have gotten together a lot over the summer (school year, too...) and they don't invite me. They would post their videos and pictures and they look like they have a lot of fun together... I would comment and be all like "wow... you guys look like you had a lot of fun!" and one of them would reply with a "yes :D" and that was it. They're all my friends, though, but I guess I can understand why they don't invite me. We're all Asian but they're all a lot smarter than I am. =/ Also, I'm like deprived of everything (music, movies, I'm the only one still without a cell phone, etc.) so it's harder to talk to me, I guess. I just want to fit in. And over the internet, it's like I'm invisible... I can sign onto chat and it'll be the same as when I'm not on; they all ignore me unless I talk to them, but then it's just small talk. They'll all be in a group chat posting status messages where only they will understand and I'm just like =/. Now, I know the whole I-have-to-invite-them-and-start-it-all thing, but that's the problem. My parents are super strict (which is why I'm so deprived of everything). I'm not allowed to invite anyone over or anything so I can't really do anything about this. I try to talk to them about it but then it'll just end up being a huge argument. My parents like to be right about everything and they'll just end up going on about what a bad child I am. I really do try to be a good and useful daughter though. I cry really easily too, so it's frustrating. I cry most when I'm sad & angry and my dad will use that as a response in an argument... he sees that as a sign of weakness. But I can't not cry. I'm always the only one who can't do this, the only one who doesn't have that... I know that sounds stupid, but if you were in my situation, you'd want to complain, too. Sorry for making it so long... but what should I do? I feel unwanted, ignored, and trapped... all my friends are having fun and I'm sitting here going "I wish I could be like them." I'd appreciate advice...