Why don't I want friends?
I don't really want friends. Sure, I'd like to have people I can call or text or hang out with, but not all the time. The idea of making friends & keeping friends just doesn't appeal to me & feels like a chore. I don't want to rely on people when I need it because people really aren't loyal anymore. I can rely on myself. I enjoy keeping to myself. I feel most comfortable alone. Also, I don't want to go through life being lonely. As I said already, I want to have people I can talk to and call on when I need them. But isn't that called using people? It's just I don't want to go out if I don't feel like it or hang out or text. I don't think a lot of people would be okay with that. I guess I'm pretty much okay with this sort of lifestyle, but if my mom or dad criticizes me about it, it gets me down. I try to be social but it just comes out as a feeling of being overwhelmed & anxious; I get hot, my face turns red, & my heart beats fast. Thank you to the people that answer :)
Should I go with my friends for outing but I don't want to go?
First ask yourself why you don’t want to go.Is it the friend circle? Then probably you’ll end up being uncomfortable. Its fine if you skip. But what I’d advice is taking another friend along instead of opting out. You still have someone to hang out with and better still, you might discover new friendships.Is it that you don’t like the place? Chill. When the company is right, everything will be fun. If there’s a phobia involved, say of heights and they’re going rapelling or mountain climbing, go for it. Don’t think, just do it.Is it that you don’t like the activity that’s going to be involved? For instance, booze and hooking up that you want to stay away from. Just tell your friends that you don’t want to go.Honestly, me being an extrovert answering this question, I’ll tell you to go anyhow. But many are introverts and they don’t like crowds. I would never push an introvert friend of mine to go out partying with me. So, if you aren’t going to be uncomfortable, don’t force yourself to join. It’s cool.
I am 13 and gay, and I want to come out to my friends, but I don't know how. What should I do?
I don’t think there’s a one size fits all answer to that question. You should do it in a place and a time that makes you comfortable. Many people are extremely progressive when it comes to homosexuality, and many times you'd be surprised that many of your friends already knew, so the event is more relief for everybody and not necessarily a point of tension. However, as someone who has had gay friends come out to them, I would make a few suggestions on what you may want to avoid.Don't do it in a public place. If they have an unfavorable reaction, both you and they deserve privacy to deal with it.2. Don’t do it in a setting where they will feel trapped. They have a right to their feelings, and it isn’t going to help them positively process if they are in a moving car, over at your house and don’t have a ride home, or in a class at school. If they want to walk away to deal with what you’ve told them, they should be able to.3. Don’t expect them to tell you how they feel right away. You likely had lots of time to process the coming out. They will (possibly) be blindsided.4. Prepare them for a serious coversation by asking them if they have time for you to talk to them. Don’t, for example, wait until you’re hanging out at baseball practice, and spring it when you are lacing up your shoes before going out on the field.Unless your friends are conservatively religious, I do think people may surprise you, so good luck!
How do I come out as gay to my friends?
“How do I come out as gay to my friends?”For purposes of coming out, I think that friends come in several categories…Some will have “known” this about you in some sense already, and they will simply nod and accept it as just another part of the person they know.These are the easy conversations, the ones that leave you thinking, “I don’t know why I waited…”Some will be surprised, but comfortable (based largely on what their experience with LGBTQ) and may simply need a little time to adjust.These first two categories are the people you will want to talk to first (if you can figure out who most of them are). They become the allies and the core of people who you may need to surround yourself with for a while.Some will be surprised and uncomfortable.Keep in mind that that you may have known the truth you are sharing with them for quite a long time, but it’s coming at them cold. Be kind, but be real.Again, you should think about these folks, and decide how (or if) you can deal with their discomfort, or even their rejection. Sometimes time helps, and sometimes friendships become less so.Sometimes the discomfort becomes a reason to let the friendship go.Que sera, sera!The only think I can add to this, as I’ve said before, is that coming out is not an event, it’s a process, and for many it goes on for life.It’s important to add that you don’t always have control over the process either, as many people are “outed” inadvertently by friends to others, and even to family!You may find things the same between you and your friends, but you also may find that the openness and honesty makes friendship all the better!And then again, you may find that new friendships can (if you choose) have this honesty built in from the very beginning.Best of luck!!
My friends don't hang out with me anymore and I feel left out. What am I going to do now?
Congratulations. You have grown way past them and are now an adult…..I know it hurts to see a group not including you, esp when you invested in the group, but it is within the nature of groups that they are notoriously fickle and self-serving.Individuals are always more invested in a group than it is in them. This is how they thrive.Avoid being dependent on ANY groups in your life. Know how to have a good time without them.I was once in this position. I was almost entirely ostracised at school.I wanted to celebrate my birthday party. So I decided to do a nerds party and I invited all the nerds and swots who were all excluded from trendy school life as I was. I thought, Oh well, if you can’t beat them, join them.The trendy girls all thought I was a swot and teacher’s pet anyway, so I thought I might as well live it for all it was worth. So I threw myself into it. I invited about 10 kids around. I never told anyone else other than them.Conversation and mulled wine flowed - and when word got round the next day about how much fun we had had, the trendy gangs were actually jealous. All we did was sit round and talk, but we had a really great time together. I played some cool music and served some food. Nothing major - but they were great conversationalists and it wasn’t until that day that I realised what I had been missing in not befriending them.The ‘trendy’ types all learned a healthy lesson about how insignificant they really were in my life. It cut them down to size - and they and I needed that.I think you need this too. I recommend enjoying your YOU time and going out and making some new friends entirely.But do focus on befriends individuals and not groups. Their friendship will last longer as they will not be under any group pressure.
Me and my friends want to go out to eat at Olive Garden with no adults, but we don’t know if we are too young.?
The youngest in our little friend group is 13, while the oldest is only 14. We would bring enough money to pay for everything and tip. Can we eat at Olive Garden with no adult supervision? If you need anymore info, just ask.
How do I come out as bisexual to my friend?
I came out to all of my friends via text.This took the stress off of me to have to find a time and tell them face-to-face, and it took the stress off of them to have a perfect off-the-cuff reply.It worked brilliantly.My basic message was:“Since we’ve been friends for so long, I feel like I should tell you that I am bisexual. I’ve always been bisexual, and I’ve known that for awhile but I wasn’t sure how to tell everyone. This doesn’t change anything between us— I’m still the same person I’ve always been. If you have questions or want to talk about it, feel free to ask me.”All of my friends responded with overwhelming support.It was nice— they each had time to figure out how they wanted to respond, and didn’t feel pressured to act in a certain way.This also left the door open for later conversations. I don’t recall anyone asking questions when I came out, but being open with my sexuality let them express their curiosities and confusions later on.It was great for me.I can’t tell you that it would be great for you— I don’t know you, your friend, your situation, or your relationship.But you do.Best of luck, my friend.
I want to come out to my best friend but I don’t know how she’ll react. What should I do?
Are you coming out to her as gay or bisexual? If that’s the case somewhere in there you might want to reassure her that you value your friendship and that you are telling her because you don’t want to keep secrets from your best friend. Basically the goal is to put her at ease that you’re not suddenly going to be hitting on her, but don’t make a big deal of that either.Aside from that, regardless of what you’re coming out as, she’s going to react according to her perceptions and biases. This could be positive or negative. Hopefully it’s positive, but if not, as Andrea Webb advised, give her some time. There’s a reason you’re best friends.Hopefully this helps. Thanks for the A2A
How to hint you're gay to your friends before coming out?
Among guy friends if the topic of girls comes up don't lie. You don't have to say you don't like women just don't show faux interest and say things like "I'm not really the best judge of that", "I'm not really interested" or "She's not my type". All reasonable things to say occasionally but if you say it often enough they might get the hint eventually. Checking out guys as they walk past is an option but I'm not sure how much I'd recommend it and it can be a bit blunt depending on how you do it. Support gay rights. If the topic comes up vocally support gay rights. If anyone bothers you about being gay because of this and you don't want to tell them say something like "You don't have to be gay to support equal rights.". That way you're dodging the issue but you're not saying you're straight. If someone gets suspicious when you don't want them to remember skillfully redirecting the focus of the conversation is extremely useful. Lying is probably easier but if you lie then people are more likely to feel betrayed when you do come out to them (because they thought they knew exactly who you are and part of that was wrong, if it's because you lied that only makes it worse). If there is a guy you like feel free to show interest, just make sure it seems like you want to be his friend and not more than that, so nothing sexual. Sayings lots of good things about him to whoever you want to hint to works pretty well, talking about wanting to see him often, etc. If you do it right anyone not paying attention should easily attribute it to a good friendship and maybe you being a bit eager/excitable. Over time though a friend should notice the disparity between how you act about him and how you act about others. Oh and Kate and Caileigh seem like the obvious choices. Make sure to make it clear to Kate that this is a serious matter and you're not going to suddenly act differently since girls can occasionally have weird expectations from situations like this. Also make sure to clarify you want this to be private and that they shouldn't tell anyone. They might anyway but that's a risk I'm sure you're aware of. This is a good first step though and not having anyone to confide in about this kind of stuff can be pretty terrible so don't let the risks scare you, just take it slow if you need to. Anyway good luck.
How can I come out to my friends and family as a lesbian without being awkward?
Your family would probably like to know before you bring your first girlfriend home. That would be awkward both for family and the girlfriend.If your friends don’t pick it up the third time you say, “Damn, that girl’s hot!”…Get smarter friends. :)In all honesty, none of us can answer this without knowing what your friends are like, and what family you’ve grown up in.I had a friend in my early 20s who made a huge deal of coming out to me — took me out to a restaurant, so I could leave without feeling awkward if I needed to… And my major disconnect was that I had a very firm mental picture of the “John” she had been telling me she was in love with, and now I had to switch it to “Jane”. Striking blue eyes and all. Graunch. The lesbian part? Never worried me. (Even before I twigged I was bisexual, I had always been lesbian/gay/trans friendly, because I couldn’t understand why I shouldn’t be.)But yeah, maybe there’s something in that. Don’t tell your friends at your home (they feel awkward about walking out) or at their home (they feel awkward asking you to walk out). Don’t pick a time when a crapload of other stuff is going on round you (school, office). Over a meal or a coffee is good. Then just be straight forward. “I wanted to let you know that I am a lesbian.”If the answer you get is along the lines of “No shit, Sherlock!” — that happens surprisingly often. :)