Is there a good benefit in letting a 14-year-old visit her mom who is in jail for 7 months due to check fraud? She said she wants to, but she might be too young to decide.
Of course it depends on the child, but most 14 year olds know their mind on at least some things. Also, I would say that 14 is old enough to realize the consequences of their decisions. She may realize that she doesn’t like going there and will then know that not visiting her mom is something she is going to have to deal with and possibly explain.
Would you let a 14 year old girl visit her mom in jail for eight months for check fraud or is that too young?
Face-to-face contact is almost always better because the two can read each other's facial expressions and body language in addition to hearing each other's words and tone of voice. Check fraud is not a crime that inherently poses a risk of harm to children and presumably the daughter is not the victim of the crime of which the mother was convicted. So there is no reason to prohibit personal contact. The goal is to promote the parent-child relationship, despite the mother's relatively short-term incarceration. The penalty for violating the law in this instance is a period of incarceration, not the dissolution of family relationships—and the daughter has not been convicted and shouldn't have to suffer any greater loss of contact with her mother than necessary.I am in no way condoning the crime of which this mother was convicted, or any crime for that matter. But we do hav a system under which the punishment is expected to fit the crime. A seven-month sentence suggests that the crime didn't warrant a stiffer penalty. Moreover, since the crime was not one for which long-term removal from society was deemed appropriate, it makes a lot of sense to keep family and other positive relationships intact so that the mother can successfully reenter society and resume the parenting of her daughter, ideally without committing further crimes. This is in the daughter's best interests.
21 years old, mom won't let me grow up, I feel trapped in my own life. HELP?
Oh honey it feels like I just read my life story. I am 22 and also have a 10:30 curfew. I have a great relationship with my parents as long as I am single. Once I have a bf problems form because then I want to stay out later and my parents won't let me. My parents are extremely old fashioned, they also want me to be a virgin until marriage. Too late! What parents do not understand is that you can have sex at all times of the day. What I don't understand is why you have been keeping this from your bf for so long if he loves you he will understand. Your mother loves you with all her heart and she is doing what she thinks is best for you which really isnt. You live in her house so you are expected to follow her rules. Just like me I'm sure you won't move out because deep down inside you know there is no place like home. My dad would also fake attacks and it was ridiculous! I stepped over his shaking body once and he finally quit the drama. You need to speak with your mother and let her know that you are at an age that if you want to do something nobody can stop you but either way you would like to seek her approval and attempt to obey. It is hard for old fashioned parents to understand this, I have a constant struggle with mine. But let me tell you one thing there is no place like home and one day you will understand your mother. If you cannot handle it anymore the best thing to do is move out.
I caught my 14 year old child stealing money from our family. How should I handle this?
When I was a bit younger than her, I had the same problem as her. I used to steal from my family and they never found out. Then through peer pressure, I started shoplifting from the school cafeteria and the local supermarket. I was one of the biggest liars I knew since I had a strange tendency to steal ever since I was young.I continued this for a really long time (around 3–4 months) and nothing bad ever happened. That was until my head of secondary came in my classroom and the next thing I knew was that I was suspended.I didn’t learn how big this had become until the cafeteria lady told me that the total amount of stolen resulted in around more than 55 dollars. Where I live, that’s a lot.That happened around 2 years ago, and ever since, I haven’t even dared to steal because the consequences can be really big. I don’t think just talking to your daughter will help because my mum did that a lot when she found out before the whole canteen fiasco.You need to show her what the consequences are and maybe even think of some punishments. I’m not trying to be mean but I know that if my mum had done that, I could’ve avoided a lot of trouble, drama and a bad mark on my permanent record.I’m 15 now and I understand why she would want to steal. My parents never gave me a lot of pocket money and I saved all that I had. But the thought of getting something that was technically free was too alluring for me and I felt that no one would mind at all.But others do mind but that’s not the biggest thing. She needs to know that it’s tainting her own self and conscience. I never used to feel guilty until I talked to the lunch lady and heard how it was affecting her own personal life.I would recommend giving her oppurtunites to get the money that she feels that she needs to steal through chores and maybe even a part-time or summer job. Those things would’ve helped me a lot during that time of my life.Good luck and I hope this helps.
Im 14 years old and my dad spanked me?
These answers are ridiculous, and I hope you ignore the ones that are especially rude and unreasonable. Parental permission is required for a tongue piercing. You got that permission. You were not being sneaky, you were not disobeying, you were not doing anything wrong. If you had forged a signature to get it that would be totally different. You didn't do that. You live with your mom and she makes most of the decisions in your life. She approved. If your dad takes issue with this, he should have taken it up with HER not you. She's the adult, and it's up to the two of them to work out things like this. Did you tell her what he did? What does she think? Of course getting your tongue pierced doesn't make you a slut. A slut is someone who sleeps around for money. A piercing is for experimentation, just like dying your hair or trying out a new style of clothes. As long as your mom said it's okay, it's okay with your school to have it, then there's not much harm. Just keep it clean. Your dad was angry that he wasn't involved in the decision, and maybe he had the right to be. But like I said, he should have called your mom about it. He has the right to tell you not to wear the piercing in his house if he wants. He did NOT have the right to punish you when you hadn't been doing wrong. Talk to your mom about this. If you are not happy visiting your dad, then this is something that should be brought up to your mom's lawyer. It's legal to spank a 14 year old but most would say it's totally inappropriate. You have to remember that lots of the people on this site who say it's okay are actually trolls with very sick fetishes, so they are not to be taken seriously.
As a 14 year old girl, how can I deal with the fact that my only aunt died of cancer today?
Two of my grandparents died a few years back. I was around 11 and it affect me pretty deep. I spent maybe a day in depression, then realised that they probably wouldn’t like me being like that (cliché but true in a sense). I decided to get more physically active as a result. I drove further and further forwards in sports in their name, and achieved more and more. Now when I think of them, I don’t feel sad, but I feel that they have driven me to achieve what I wouldn’t have been able to do before. They made me stronger and faster Than I could ever hsve been.Now I think of then with a smile rather than a tear
14 year old son sleeping in same bed as his female cousin?
My 14 year old son is leaving in 2 days to visit his cousin for a week. He was looking foward to going, and she called a week ago to ask if he is coming to visit. He goes every 6 monthes. His cousin is 28, and the last time he went to visit her, I found out everynight he ran from his bed, to HER bed and slept there. This happened every night. This is his only cousin, her name is Lauren German and is a actress and played rolls in a few small films, She said she didn't mind they were only having fun. I do know they have a good bond together and I know they do alot in 1 week. My son has no other siblings. How Do I prevent this from happening again? Or Should I not care? I know she doesn't mind and I know for sure he will do it again.
What is the best way to handle your 5-year-old when he doesn't listen to his mom but will do anything that dad asks?
w/both words and action.The list of both is long. However the “parental unit” must B firm, strong, united. This assists the toddler develop a ‘healthy identity’. Parents R often of opposite genders and the child has a lill of each. Relating to a functional ‘couple’ (rather than dysfunctional 1) assists in relating to the opposite gender as well as a model on how to B a boy, man or (not sure the 5 y/o gender) girl, woman. Children, simply by being alive, challenge the couple (‘splitting’ is 1 example) as a well the functioning of the individual members of the “couple unit”.Example: Child sez to dad “Can I do xxx?” Dad: ”No.” Child goes to Mom in other rm out of ear shot of dad “Mom can I xxx?” Mom: “Yes, sure honey.” Parents have just been split - a bad thing for fam, for marriage, for mom, for dad, and a unhelpful lesson for child. Child did not scheme this out - just natural (1st few Xs anyway).I C some other helpful asws here so will not repeat. This is what I can add to the others, tho. Sorry 4 the weird terms, HTH. This is just the beginning. Enjoy the challenges, they can B seen as messages frm god, urgings to deepen ur relation to ur spouse & child, growth challenges, all frm love. On the other hand, they can B seen as just more s4!+, trouble, signs of the toddler frm 4E77, all depending on attitude…8^0