YES!Honestly, it wasn’t spanking, it was something far worse.As an adult I’ve realised that I was abused by both of my parents. Too many incidents to write about them all, but a few hints may be good.Once my mum hit me in a head strong enough to made me fall of the chair and smached my head against furniture. I still have scar to proove that. Reason? I drew a crooked triangle in my math exercisebook. I was 2nd grade at the time.My father hit me in a head during breakfast, because I placed my mug at my left side and used left hand to grab it. Strike was hard enough to made my face fall into a plate full of hot porridge.This one is major… What would you do, if someone tell you a story about youre child beeing involved in sexual relation with a friend of the household? 8 years old girl and man in his fourties. And story is delivered by your neighbour and classmate of your own child? Typical he said - she said thing. My parents asked me to tell the truth, which I did. No such a thing ever happened, I never told such disgusting things. I didn’t even understood them by the time. What they did? Well, they locked doors and windows, and started interrogation in Guantanamo style. I was beaten, waterboarded couple of times, I was’t allowed to drink or eat for 12 hours, no bathroom, nothing. They took turns, screaming and beating me in order to get a confession. They were sure that I told lies about that man. After 14 hours I broke and confess. It stopped. I was allowed to drink, have some food and go to bathroom.In result I was not allowed to have any privileges any more. No television, no toys, no outdoor activities, no books, and no friends for half a year. I was eight years old then.Fun fact: My neighbour and classmate confessed to making all things up. He came clear after few days. He thought it was fun to made me a part of his disgusting fantasies.2nd fun fact: Despite his confession I wasn’t allowed to watch telly for month, and to bring home any friends for half a year.I confronted my parents about all of punishments I suffered from them. Their answer? -What we supposed to do? You were causing so much problems!I was quiet, shy girl, with no friends, and one passion I was allowed to follow - reading. I was getting best grades in entire school till high school. Such a problematic child, don’t you think?
Spanking??????
Yes, it is perfectly fine. I don't believe in spanking either. My parents didn't believe in spanking, and they raised two kind, intelligent, respectful and well behaved children who have never gotten so much as a detention in their entire lives. I'm now 16 and I never went through a rebellious phase either, though I am perfectly willing to stand up for what is right and question things. You do, however, need to discipline your children. My parents used a consequence system. My mom would love to "catch" us doing something good, and we would get a positive consequence for it, such as extra attention and maybe a small treat. If we did something wrong we got a negative consequence, maybe a time out, and we didn't recieve any additional attention. She also made sure she explained why we got the consequence, and told us what we need to do to avoid the negative consequences, and get the positive ones. Not only that, but she explained why something was wrong, and how it might hurt others (which we never wanted) which allowed us to extend that to other things. We quickly got to the point where we were good for the sake of being good and making others happy, rather than focusing on rewards or punishments (which are never guaranteed in the real world). The system worked well, and I don't imagine I would have turned out as well, or so happy, with any other method of parenting.
Should i spank my 9 year old son?
Well I'm sorry bout your troubles but I'm a proud father of three. 6 5 and 4. My 4 year old lives wit me and my wife. He's a young man who is very spontaneous and open mind and adventurous. My other two is wit their mom. Anyway. A kid is gonna be a kid no matter what but you have to put your foot down and be the parent that baby is old enough to understand rite from wrong. I have my babies voice trained. I started that while they was crawling. So they know when daddy playing and when daddy is serious. Voice training works. Never have to spank my babies is wonderful. But as far as your situation goes. I think spanking a 9 yrold who throws tempettantrum is not enough. U need to give him/her a good bare butt whooping wit ur hand. That'z not child abuse that'z called bringing ur seed back down to earth and regaining control. The spouse should back u 100% on this. All I can say is until the parents are on the same page its only gonna get tougher on u and its gonna bite ur spouse in tha butt before long. Good luck wit ur situation. Remember that baby will have babies one day and how ur kid is raised is gonna be how they raise their babies. Sorry for blabbering on and on but our kids is this worlds future let me know if u need me to further that discussion. Goodbye now.
Having earned a number of such spankings during precisely that time period, I can say that it was not. A wooden spoon is roughly the same spanking efficacy as a bare hand - about one step up from a paddle ball paddle (approximately zero effectiveness, administered purely as 'token' punishment). Except, of course, that the wooden spoon spares the hand and gives the spank administrator a certain added elan.An elegant weapon, for a more civilized age.One time when I was four or five my mom was spanking me with a wooden spoon and the bowl portion broke off mid-spank. This frustrated my mom even more because she really liked her wooden spoons. So she was frantically trying to administer a spanking using just the tiny wooden dowel handle but instead of laughing I had to pretend it was horrible because she was close to the breaking point where she might reach down and come up spanking with her Dr. Scholl's wooden sandal, and that was a horrific punishment!
*PEOPLE WHO ARE THINKING ABOUT SPANKING OR ALREADY DO PLEASE READ*It is legal, I guess, but in my VERY honest opinion, no, no you should not.Here’s why:You are hurting a child. Why? Because s/he’s a child and does things to test you. Children test their parents limits to see what they can and cannot do. You did this as a child, right? Of course you did! There is NO possible way for the child to know everything he/she needs to do right after birth or throughout his/her life. So why try, it’s useless anyway!Imagine on of your decedents, cute and lovable, being hurt and crying because someone hurt them. Settle this in, think about it a moment. Let the anger flow in. Your first reaction would be to go to find out who it was and tell them off, right? Now change the picture to be your cute and lovable child is being hurt by YOU crying because YOU hurt them. Doesn’t that seem reasonable right!?Last but not least, can you imagine how that will affect your child. Do you want your child to be SCARED of you? I know a friend who is spanked when she makes a mistake, and she is terrified of her parents. She tries to be in a separate room from them. She tries to stay after school for as long as possible. Do you really want your child to be terrified of you because you hurt them? Do you really want your child to never be in your company? You want a healthy relationship with your child right?This is gonna sound manipulative, but: If you want to be a good parent and pass on the good parent talents, CHOOSE THE CORRECT PATH.Please, PLEASE, DO NOT spank your child. DO NOT.
PARENTS WHO BELIEVE IN SPANKING!? ANSWER PLEASE!! this is important?
I am not yet a parent, but I will answer these as what my parents did for discipline: what do you use to spank them? your hand, a belt, etc.? > hand do you put them over your knee to spank them or use another position? > I can't remember them ever having a position, just standing up was how the spanking usually happened. do you have a certain place that you go to spank them or do you just spank wherever and whenever? > Whenever and wherever. If in public, I was taken outside or to the car. how long do you spank? five min. at a time? 2 min.? > 1 or 2 swats. do you spank them bare butt or clothed? > clothed i've heard some parents use water on their butts, then spank to make it sting. do you do that? > no do you feel spanking is effective? > yes My personal input: When I have children, they will be spanked as discipline. I will use other forms of discipline first ("time out", loss of certain privileges, etc.), but I do believe that sometimes, a quick swat on the butt is needed and well-deserved. (And spanking is far from being abuse.) I see so many kids today that aren't disciplined, and I think this is going to be part of the downfall of our society. Kids think that they can run their parents, and many do. Parents need to be parents, not try to be their kid's best friend. .
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