Should a young father put himself on child support and determine paternity since the mom keeps the kid away?
I am 20yr old male with a 5months son I think. The mother of the child use to live in the same area before she got pregnant but after being about a month pregnant move to a city inside the same state but far away.I have asked her for a paternity she won't do it.I asked could we set up something where he visits my family she says no.The reason I ask for a paternity test is because before and after she was pregnant I had trust issue cause she 17yrs old immature and not for a serious relationship. I said she cheated with two other males cause they where just a liil too close of course she denied it then she was about a month at the time.Then a month after he was born I received a message via myspace frm a fake account its a pic of her with a towel almost naked.I called her she denied it again so I assumed it was one of the dude I accused her of messing with a while back.Now,we barely talk maybe a week ago she confessed yeah it was that dude who sent the pics,yeah she did do something,and she is in a relationship with the dude. I have received bad text messages,and voicemail of him wanting to fight. I also like the first month spend like 400 on bed and stroller.Last month I also sent 200 to a child I never see and not sure she is mines. She pretty much keeping me way and doing her on thing. My aunt says I should just put myself on child support and be done with it. I'm a little worried about that cause she can lie and say I didn't be anything. She can deny she didn't do anything and the courts may lean her way with everything maybe if his is mines. She even has visited town didn't tell me or bring him by then calls after she leaves and tells me she was in town but not anymore just childish immature. I know the courts or hard on fathers and if he is mines who know how child much support payments will be. I just think she has it easy and just gonna get by with the stuff she did.What do y'all think??
I'm a babysitter, and the husband is hitting on me?
Go GO Ressa, no, no, no! You have ALL wrong, I'm sorry you read it that way. But you do have it all wrong, especially when accusing me of lying that they have split. When I first began babysitting there, I noticed they didn't sleep in the same room, they tole me it was because he snored too loud... later on down the road I was still kind of blind to their problems because they have very humorous characters, so it was good that it wasn't visible, well it was, but it wasn't at the same time. Much later down the road, she called and said I could take the next week off, while she called and asked my mother to pray with her about something. When I returned the following week, he was gone, back to NY. He still comes back to see the kids, but apparently that's the end of it. I DO NOT want them to separate, as her and I are good friends. My question was simply to ask whether or not this could be labeled as a bond-type friendship, or considering their current separation just not worry about it.
Why Do Women With Children Alienate Women Without Children?
I know this is a generalization and I'm sure not every new mother/young mother is like this. This is just my experience with all of my friends/family members with children.Every woman I know could go on and on for hours about their children, or converse with other women about their children. It's almost as if they have nothing else to talk about, or have no other interest/life outside of their children. Any women who doesn't have a child doesn't get invited to as many social events, and they usually get alienated in conversation. I myself do not have any children, and do not plan on having any. It's a personal decision and my husband is fine with that. I think children are adorable, and I love my little nephews and nieces do death, but do not want any myself. It seems like as soon as women find out you don't want have kids it's like some personal offense to them. I tend to not be invited in social circles of women with kids. I notice this at work, too. The women with kids tend to clique together. Now I'm not someone who likes to go out drinking, or clubbing. I go to school, work, spend time with my husband and family, workout, travel, and love doing girly things as well. So, I know it's not about a difference of lifestyle.
Is it inappropriate for a babysitter to bathe with a kid she babysits?
We have a 19 year old babysitter for our 4 year old son, and we like her very much. She is very responsible and good with our son. She has been his babysitter for over a year, he loves her, and I trust her. Or, I should say, I used to trust her. Sometimes my wife and I stay out late and leave the babysitter in charge of giving our son a bath and putting him to bed. I don't have a problem with her giving him a bath, because I would rather have her in the bathroom watching him in case he fell and hit his head or something. But recently I found out from my wife that our babysitter doesn't just give our son baths, but she actually takes a bath with him. I'm concerned about my 4 year old son being exposed to that. My wife doesn't think it is that big a deal, since she has taken baths with our son in the past. But I think there's a big difference between a child bathing with his mother and a child bathing with his babysitter. I would like to confront our babysitter and let her know that this sort of thing is not appropriate, but my wife insists that she isn't doing anything wrong, and thinks that confronting her about it will embarrass her. Neither one of us want to get rid of her, she is an excellent babysitter and I seriously doubt there is any other "inappropriate behavior" going on during these shared baths. I am sure that they are innocent and well intentioned, otherwise she would never have told my wife about them in the first place. However, I would still like to talk with her and express my discomfort towards this practice. My wife tells me I should just let it go, and that it's normal for children at his age to bathe with their parents or guardians. What do you guys think? Am I overreacting, or should I have a talk with our babysitter?
My husband won't let me spend any money because he said it's his?
I certainly understand how you feel. And, I understand how your husband feels. Only the two of you know your family's income and bill ratio. I think consideration is needed on both sides. Your husband goes to work outside of the home everyday to support your family. You work inside the home to support your family, and you deserve to be respected for that. If it is your choice to not put the baby in daycare then, you have to understand that this will put you in a direct position to have to deal with having an allowance. If your husband is insisting that stay home to care for the baby and won't let you work, then I think, the two of you need to be more creative and maybe let you work the nigh shift or something. In today's economy and harsh economic times, everyone needs to work. I used to be a stay at home mom, I had hard times financially and sometimes I got what I wanted. But, now, I am back to work and I love it. I am a self-confessing shop til you drop a holic. My bottom line is, the two of you need to compromise. You would be surprised at how many great daycare facility's there are out there. Don't be so overprotective. Millions of kids have been there and turned out fine. I think it would improve the quality of your life and marriage. And, yeah, 68.00 is too much money to spend on jeans. You gotta learn to bargain shop. Try Old Navy. Your husband will love you for it. And, no, he's not being cheap, he sounds like he's looking out for his family. He offered to give you an allowance because he did not think you were spending the money wisely. He's a very wise man. And, he is the head of your family. You need to respect him. Too bad, you don't live near me, I would show you how to get 6 pair of jeans with that 68.00. Believe that!