Do I spoil my daughter too much?
I think you spoiled her more then I expected
What do I do about my spoiled teenage daughter?
Yes, I posted this yesterday, but I left out some things I thought were important to add. My 17 year old daughter is the absolute definition of a spoiled rotten brat and I have no idea what to do about it. I'm a single parent because her father walked out when she was only a baby, and I had a rough upbringing myself so I've always tried to make sure and give my daughter everything her heart desired because I didn't have that. It's seriously backfired, though. For starters, she will not do ANYTHING I tell her too or anything anyone else tells her too either. When I tell her to clean her room or clean at all, she screams "No!" and after I beg and plead her too, she'll just say something like "I'm not the f*cking maid, you are!" and yes, she loves to cuss. Every other word out of her mouth is a curse word; she especially loves using the f bomb and a couple other swears daily. She also expects everything and when I give them to her, it still isn't enough. For example, she's madly in love with Lady Gaga so I got her front row tickets to one of Gaga's concerts back in April and she was pissed because they weren't VIP like she had wanted. For Christmas this year, my daughter is demanding a Chanel bag that costs roughly around $4,000 and when I told her no because I couldn't afford it, she started cussing at me and calling me a "Broke a** hooker" and then went on whining about how all her friends had Chanels and Gucci's and she was the only one who didn't. She refuses to get a job because she hates taking orders, and because I won't buy her a car because she's irresponsible, she just sneaks out and comes and goes when she pleases. I've tried everything! Grounding her, taking all her possessions away...nothing works. She finds a way to sneak past me and finds all of her things I hide and takes them back. She's also been caught shop lifting with her friends, skipping classes at school and thinks it's all a joke and doesn't care about punishment. Also, she drinks any alcohol she can get her hands on (Whiskey, Tequila, Champagne, Beer) and smokes pot. How do I know this? Last night she came home completely stoned and passed out on the couch. I've also recently found out that she's bisexual and has been having regular sex with her GIRLfriend when I'm not home. I'm at my breaking point. Nothing works anymore
My teen daughter is a spoiled brat.?
My daughter is a spoiled brat. She's 16 & is convinced she's the center of the universe. I married her mom 20 years ago & adopted her 2 kids. A girl who was then 11 & her son who was 10. We were very happy & we were over joyed when we welcomed Jessica into the world, nothing could be better. However, because of the age difference we showered her with gifts. I suppose i had a sub-consciesce favoritism because she was mine. We are well off & sent her to a Catholic school for $25,000 a year. Since she was born she has never heard the word no. She went to bed when she wanted, went to school when she wanted & everything else. She now goes to private HS for $50,000 a year & she is like a 5 year old. She won't say please, or do what she's told & barks orders at us. She cries if i try to say no & her mom sides with her. My wife is a housewife & i give her an allowance of $5,000 a week. On top of witch, our daughter gets her hair done, nails done, waxed tanned & my wife does this stuff with her. We go to Italy for vacations or any where else we want & it's all just rewarding her for being a witch. I just payed $30,000 on her sweet 16 & bought her a pink Corvette for another 30. The other 2 kids are great & normal people who now have their own families. I don't want there kids to learn from their aunt. I'm older now & i'm just sick of it. At age 68 i don't need this any more. Please help me convince my wife that something needs to be done.
Is my daughter spoiled? :(?
Please don't hit your child. I feel it's the lazy way of parenting and only teaches respect out of fear. My dad used to hit me when I did something wrong when I was a kid and it made me fear him. Anyway you should include her when you donate toys. Maybe take her to a homeless shelter and show her how others have it worse. Try to keep the toy count at a minimum meaning try not to get her a toy right when she asks for it. Another thing teach her about making her own money when she's older like chores to earn money. I hope your daughter doesn't turn out spoiled but she sounds like a sweet child so I guess you don't have to worry. In my class there's this girl who is spoiled rotten and spent an hour and a half telling everyone that her parents don't love her because they didn't buy her an iPod.
My neighbor says my daughter's spoiled?
No she is not spoiled if she is grateful for the things she has and if she shares her toys with her sister and her friends. Dance is great for a little girl's self-esteem, confidence, grace, posture, and discipline. It will also help her stay in shape and prevent her from becoming overweight as she gets older. Karate and soccer are great for fitness also, but I do not think that a little girl should play football. If she enjoys all the activities she does then let her continue them. My husband and I have a 2 year old daughter and a lot of people probably think she is spoiled although no one has actually said it to me. Your neighbor is the one who is acting spoiled and rude! If you can afford to give your daughter these things then who cares what anyone else says or thinks. My daughter takes ballet, has a huge custom made playhouse with electricity and working lights in it, has a TV in her room, has a playroom with tons of toys and a play kitchen, has 2 tricycles, and has tons of clothes and shoes. I also take her out to lunch 3 or 4 times a week at nice restaurants, and let her get her nails painted when I have mine done. We go shopping at least once or twice a week and she always gets a new outfit, a new pair of shoes, or a new toy. So maybe my daughter is spoiled but who cares because I enjoy spoiling her!
Is my daughter spoiled (please answer)?
she is 14 wears shorts that shows her butt she wears shirts that shows her bra (i allow it) and she has a TV, Laptop, Computer, IPhone 4, Horse, Wii, lots of animals, does whatever she wants, i have pay lots of money for her to go see Justin Bieber, Miley Cyrus, Britney Spears, Cody Simpson backstage and if she wants something and i say no she calls both of her grandma's and one of them gets it for her and i payed $250 for someone to come and paint Justin Bieber on one wall, Cody Simpson on the other wall, Greyson Chance on the other wall and if i yell at her for doing some thing wrong she rolls her eyes and she was in beauty pageants when she was little and she was a model
How do I deal with a daughter who is a spoiled brat? My 13.5 year old daughter leaves the door unlocked, lights on, television and air condition on, her room is a pig house, and she refuses to do any chores. I have just divorced and am struggling.
Thanks for the A2A. If you’ve just divorced, this is an emotional time for all of you. Angry people (which probably describes all three of you just now) don’t make good decisions, so her running off to her dad’s, her dad being so unsupportive of your problems, and you demanding things from her and calling her a spoiled brat are all the wrong choices. In a limited sense, your ex is right that it’s your fault, but it’s not only your fault: it’s his and your daughter’s as well. All three of you are involved.It sounds like your daughter is expressing her distress by exaggerating the usual teenage-rebellion stuff, which is not all that surprising. She probably needs to know that both you and her father still love her and that she’s not to blame for the divorce, and this is her way of testing that - not a very good way, but then she’s only 13.5 and can’t be expected to have developed a full set of social skills yet.Perhaps you could get her to talk with you. Not you telling her what you want and trying to make her obey, so much as the two of you on equal terms working out solutions together to your mutual problems. If you can include her as an equal in the decision-making process for everything that involves her and perhaps a few things that don’t, she will feel much better (so will you) and she’s much more likely to behave reasonably. Then you can all calm down and start living reasonably happy lives.Another possibility is Family Counselling. Your doctor or her school counsellors will be able to help you to organise this, if you and she both want to try it.In case the question changes, the one I answered was:“How do I deal with a daughter who is a spoiled brat?My 13.5 daughter leaves the door unlocked, lights on,television and air condition on. Her room is a pig house, refuses to do any chores. I have just divorced, and struggling to work. When I ask her to help she just sets off to her dad’s house. My ex won’t support me on this. Tells me its my fault..”
Would you spoil daughters over your sons?
No I don't spoil my daughter over my sons. I treat her differently because she's different from her brothers just like her brothers are different from each other.I treat my boys like men, we pester each other and thump each other. I do that because when I do they light up inside.I treat my daughter gently, I hug her and kiss her forehead, I get her chocolates. I do that because when I do she lights up inside.I have a pseudo step-daughter. She is one of my daughters best friends and has spent so much time at our house that she calls us mom and dad. Her dad is pretty stable in her life so I’m the step-dad without being married to her mom (thus pseudo). I do spoil her, but she pushes herself so hard in sports that sometimes she needs a place to come and be spoiled. And guess what, when I do it she lights up inside.
My daughter is angry at me because I called her a spoiled brat after she didn’t clean her room during midterms. How can I make her see she was wrong?
You can’t because she’s not wrong. Just because you’re the parent doesn’t make you right by default friend, and considering the situation you’ve described you’re being a bit of an ass.Whether she’s in highschool, middleschool, or college, midterms are HARD. They’re stressful, they tend to happen all at once, they generally cover lots of material from the length of the course, and they take a lot of time and energy to prepare for.Considering that all of these stages of her life are rather pivitol for her future, and the education system is built for a factory and not the current work environment, this makes for a very stressful situation.When you’re in a situation like that you have to ration your energy because you only have a finite amount to use.Guess what meaningless task doesn’t deserve the resources it takes to execute compared to midterms?Now consider that you as her parent, are adding to the stress she’s already experiencing from midterms by harassing her about her a meaningless task like cleaning her room of all things, and calling her names.Apologize to your daughter for being insensitive and leave her alone. She’ll clean up when she’s less stressed. And if she’s not less stressed by the time midterms are over you might need to give her a bit more TLC because a living space is a reflection of the mind. If her room is a mess (and it’s not usually a mess) then that could mean that there’s other problems going on in her life. It might be a subconscious cry for help.For now it’s probably just midterms though, and you should let her be.And apologize.
How do I handle a 13-year-old step daughter that is spoiled by my husband and her mother? This drives a wedge between me and my husband. I am always wrong.
First, she is not your daughter so whether or not you think she is spoiled is irrelevant. You are not responsible for raising her. She has a father and a mother.Second, probably should’ve gotten the ground rules clarified prior to marriage, but now, not later, is the time to get them clarified. Do this with a family therapist. Go in with a clear goal. Mine would be how to ensure that my husband and I were united in how we dealt with his daughter.For example, do you get to discipline her? If not, then fine. Put forth a few scenarios you have from the past and ask how he would have liked to handle it. Ensure you are ok with the behavior in your home. That is where I would focus.It is your home, too. You and your husband need to sit down and go through everything from who cooks, does the dishes, tells the daughter what she should do (I would always punt to him on this), and how to ensure she behaves civilly in the home. You’ll never get it all down, but you can get down the process by which you two come to an agreement.If she says mean things, your husband must agree that this is unacceptable and tell you what he will do about it. The difficulty here is that he may not follow through … and teenagers are always saying mean things to their parents…it’s just that you are not their parent and so don’t have the tolerance for it.Me? I’d have a very kind talk with him and say that you love him but this is causing stress with you. You don’t want to come between him and his daughter and you are now uncomfortable in your own home. You know you should have thought about this prior to marriage, but here is where we are. If you can afford it, I’d tell him that you need to feel good in your home and because the daughter is doing x,y,z (I’d be specific), it might be good for you to get an apartment and for the next 5 years, You’ll go (or he’ll go) to the apartment when he has custody.You both misjudged. He misjudged your tolerance (regardless of if you are a witch or reasonable, this is irrelevant) and you misjudged your position in the family. Ce la vie.You can wallow in resentment or try to mitigate it or leave. Good luck.