Is there something wrong with me?
i'm an 18 year old girl. i wear t.shirts, sweatshirts, baggy pants and etnies shoes. i have short blond hair and never wear make up. i go skate and play soccer. i read manga and fantasy novels, watch horror and splatter movies, listen to metal and play bass in a band. i like RPGs and violent videogames. i have tons of friends, both male and female. i'm a lesbian and my female friend with benefits is my best friend, we have known each other for about a year before having sex. i burp, fart, spit and cuss. i adore studying math, next year i want to enroll in physics at college and then become a researcher.
I never cry, is there something wrong with me?
I don't really see anything wrong with your story or you, you're just a really strong person. Your story reminded me of a girl at a retreat I helped run a few months back, when we divided into small groups, she was in mine, and during the course of the discussion she stated she had the perfect life, with loving parents, and was raised not to cry, and never did, but after an activity later in the day when we split back to small groups she broke out into tears and went through a 1/4 of a box of kleenex. She kept apologizing but we kept telling her she was only human. it just takes a certain event/moment, and all the emotions will come out. you just haven't had it yet
How do I tell if there's something wrong with me?
I can't speak from personal experience, but I have had a couple friends who are, well, a little out there. Now I think a lot of it is just being a teenager. Honestly it's super stressful being a high school student. You have to deal with grades and difficult classes, but also people. There are people I can't stand to be around and constantly talk sh#t about me behind (and in front of) my back. Sometimes I don't even know if my friends are really “good friends”. Now of course this could all just be teen hormones, but if you really think there might be a problem. (Like if you need to ask strangers on the internet whether it's normal or not) then maybe you should talk to someone. I don't know if you have a strong relationship with your parents ( i hope you do), but if not, talk to your best friend or anyone else you know that truly cares about your well-being. These are the people who you should talk to, because they might not know the answer, but they are going to try a lot harder than even the most diligent Quoran in the internet. They will have long conversations with you about why you feel like something is wrong with you, and if it's serious, they will be with you as you try to find more serious help. But like I said, I'm not the expert, so whether you find this useful is obviously up to you.
I hate people, is something wrong with me?
When I started my graduate work in psychology, my first professor warned us that we would see ourselves in every diagnosis. And it was true.Just about every person experiences or behaves in abnormal or anti-social, or socially unacceptable ways, or has odd thoughts at one time or another, you name it.What moves a person over a line is as varied as the myriad behaviors and personalities of people themselves. Only you, and a professional (which I am not) can really hash that out…Have you acted on your thoughts?Do they go away over time? Have you had a chance to evaluate that empathy or cool down?These are serious questions that can be worth exploring, but the fact that you are concerned suggests that you are like me and my entire cohort… thoughtful, self-reflective, and you are bumping up against morals and values and empathetic feelings that make you question your thoughts and behaviors. That can be a really healthy normal thing. Everyone has wacky thoughts and sometimes people even screw up and act on them. It’s those who can’t or won’t stop or who don’t even try that are probably more dangerous, and usually they don’t question themselves like you are here.Huge qualification - I am not a practicing psychologist. In no way is anything here advice. I just want to give a practical take on what could be pretty common feelings.You mentioned lies and betrayal.And you are questioning yourself and you are in touch with your own empathy.Please do a search here in Quora about a term called “gaslighting.” It is a surprisingly common tool that bullies and abusers use to confuse people. They use this technique to confuse their targets and somehow make them feel responsible for things others are doing to them. Lies and betrayal are deeply rooted in gaslighting. There are amazing and helpful stories here that may help you determine if you are being gaslighted. I hope not, but it may also help you to see how lies and betrayal can really hurt, and you are not alone.
Why can't I feel love - is something wrong with me?
Yes you have a severe problem and it requires immediate diagnosis.The problem is called “OVERTHINKING”My dear friend, love is a feeling, not a thought. You can never think on love. Its beyond questions. You are simply pressuring yourself to think and analyze your love. This is not required.Love needs no language. It talks on its own. Not necessary that you always express the love you have for each other. You need to feel it with an open heart. What i Can understand from you question is you are being too hard on yourself and your feelings and you are not letting anybody in. Its all in your head.Let go of what fears you have. Family is the purest and the most beautiful source of unconditional love. Go easy on yourself, allow yourself to experience the love. It’s not that you don’t know that your family loves you. You are well aware of that fact. You are just not letting it pass through your head.Your family will always love you. Even if you made a big mistake, hey may get angry, be mad at you, may not talk to you for a few months, but will come running to you the moment they realize you got a scratch/ wound.You cant feel love, because you not allowing yourself to feel it. You have created a boundary around you and you are leaving no room for more emotions to flow in. Don’t do it. Try breaking the wall you have created. Only you can do it. Allow yourself to be free. Talk more to your parents, share some of your day’s experience with them. laugh with them.You too love your parents a lot, just that you are not allowing your heart to send this message to your head. Relax and be free.Take care.
Is there something wrong with me if I am not what I think I'm supposed to be?
You need to adjust the scope of what you think you should be with what you are actually capable of being right now and what you want in the future. If you are just trying to please other people then you need to bridge the gap between their expectations and what you can actually accomplish. Set small goals that you can achieve and start working in the direction of your larger pursuits. Setting unrealistic goals that you have no chance of accomplishing today will cause procrastination and depression. Reassess your goals and make them achievable goals. They can be somewhat difficult but don’t make them unrealistically high expectations that you will only fail at without being better trained and have more life experience to accomplish. We all get where we are going and we can’t get to the top of the mountain without taking the right steps to get there.
Is there something wrong with me? Cuz thats what my mom thinks.?
Your mom is trying to comfort you, but she's doing it badly. When she compares what you are going through to what she went through, what she's trying to say is: "I know exactly how you feel, I went through the same and worse, and don't believe those things those people say because you are beautiful, and you will survive this, just like I survived it." Unfortunately, you are getting the message from it that she's trying to trivialize what you went through. But I don't think she MEANS to do that, it's just that sometimes people don't know what the right thing to say is, so they end up saying something unhelpful. I think she's also trying to make these things seem trivial in the sense that eventually, when you are older, they will seem trivial to you. But right now they're horrible, and I'm really sorry you are going through them. The only thing I can suggest is that you watch the "It Gets Better" videos on YouTube. You're so much better than this and you will get through it.