Nosy/annoying ex mother in law!?
Here it goes. I recently ended my relationship w/ my son's father, because of lies, cheating and his violent temper. it got to the point where he threw me in the floor once and one time was bout to hit me. Anyways, so now his mom is telling other people that it was my fault, that i was the jealous one and that i was no help to his son on top of other thigns, trying to make him look the victim. It annoys me that my ex would just start lying like that, and tell his mom and her spreading false rumors! I try not to let it go to me, but is frustrating. is like, should i defend myself or ignore them!
What do you really think about your mother in law?
Great Q. My mother in law is the reason there are so many jokes about them. She thinks her son is perfect even although he never pays the bills, tells me he has and lies his way out of everything. She tells everybody I eat "funny food" because I am a vegetarian and gives me whatever vegetables are being made for dinner - excluding the meat of course - Yum Yum. I hate going over to her house, but can't avoid it at times. She makes snide comments about my taste in clothes, furniture, books, music etc. Anything to put me down. Of course her darling son says "just ignore her." Like your Mother in law mine also buys sweets for my son and gives him meat when he is vegetarian -the old witch -I guess you do what I have done, that is see her as little as possible. Just enough to keep the peace. The best solution is probably to let your partner & kids see her without you. You must have plenty of excuses...Need to take the curtains down without the kids being here...have to see dentist,doctor, therapist (cause of the old witch) research for a new job, girls day out, various illnessess - why don't you make one up and see what she says about it. If she's anything like my mother in law she will be an expert. Heh heh. As a last resort move - I moved countries, it's been bliss..
My mother-in law tells me babies get hiccups because they have wet diapers, is this true? if so, why?
heh, no... do you get hiccups because you have to pee? :-p
What does it mean to have sexual dreams about your mother?
In my experience, these kinds of dreams occur in people who are unconsciously too attached and/or identified with the mother-complex, so to speak.The dream is meant to shock the dreamer into an awareness of an unhealthy psychological situation, one which keeps the dreamer from stepping into adult life.Jung called this psychological stalemate the family romance. It typically manifests in a psychological relationship with a parent which takes on a character that is too much like a marriage or romance.It can be really obvious, for example in a family where the father dies and an all-too-young son steps in to be the man of the house. I mean, it’s certainly a noble effort on the part of the child, but the mother can let it go too far.A son cannot serve as a substitute, psychological husband. When that boy grows up, a huge part of himself is still trapped in childhood, despite the fact that he had to grow up early.Another way it manifests is in the mother-son relationship where the mother acts like a poison in the man’s life - constantly pulling him aside and injecting him with her motherly wisdom regarding what he should and should not do with his life, all the while offering it as motherly love.An unhealthy attachment to the Mother keeps a man from being able to authentically relate to women, and moreover, from connecting to the women who really attract him at the soul level.There are many ways in which this kind of situation manifests itself, but at its root is an unhealthy psychological attachment that should be severed. Once you can do that, you should start seeing a different kind of feminine appearing in your dream, one which won’t constellate an incest taboo.Archetypally speaking, this is called the battle for deliverance from the Mother (see C.G. Jung, Symbols of Transformation, CW, volume 5). It’s in every hero-fighting-the-dragon story.I have assumed that the dreamer was a man, but I have also seen sexual dreams about the mother in women. It’s still the same kind of unhealthy dynamic, only it takes on different characteristics.
I need gift ideas for my 80 year old mother-in-law?
My mother-in-law's birthday is this week and I have no idea what to give her for a gift. A little background info: *She can't get out much anymore. Pretty much she stays home alone. (We all visit when we can) *She lives in a very small, somewhat cluttered apartment, so there's not room for much more stuff *She already has TONS of pictures of the grandkids. *She's not into new technology. She does have a CD player and a VCR, but I doubt that she could deal with anything more high-tech than that. *She likes to bake, but she has diabetes so she doesn't do it too much anymore. (I gave her a cookbook for diabetics last year) *She likes jigsaw puzzles, but we've given her those before... many times! She also likes playing cards when she gets the chance. Any suggestions?
Got an a ugly physical fight with mother inlaw what should I do?
Its been bout 3 years when I got into a fight with MIL because she wanted me and my family out of her house. Everything started when she and her husband FIL where acting very rude with us, for ex they put all the dishes and pans away, they lock the laundry room, weren't talking to us .... cant remember what else. I couldn't take this s@#t no more, when I noticed things where missing in our room I got really mad. I took too much s@#t from them than I confronted my MIL, at first she look suprised I spoke and said something, She of course denied it. Once I walk away she got me from my hair, I almost forgot she was caring a new premature baby while she got my hair and pull me. All I can remember is telling her "THE BABY YOU CRAZY *****!!!" Trying to pull myself away from her worrying about the baby. I heard a really loud cry of course it was the baby, she had droped him on the bed, once I saw that I started hitting her, first fight by the way, I felt like it was meant to be bc all the anger I had it was time for me to let it out somehow. Then my husband came in and separate us, this is the **** up part she told my husband I hit the baby and dropped him on the bed and that I was having an affair at work and other things, she was obviously lying because little that she know my husband knows where I work theres only women, funny huh! how the truth comes out. I think she got more mad bc her son wasn't against me than she call her daughters by phone and one of her daughters brought a bf he end up fighting with my husband don't know what she told them to start the fight. My husband was crying bc of what had just happen we left and didn't spoke to them for like a month well my husband did not me. I haven't spoke to them for 3 years and never gone back to that house. My husband and I sometimes argue bc I don't speak to them or go over to there house. I just cant act like nothing happen, especially when they haven't apologized to me and there son and granddaughter cause she saw everything, she was 3 when it happen now she's 5 and she still remembers, its sad knowing that your kid had to see it. I'm not sure if I'm doing wrong and I should just act like nothing happen and go on with our lives? Please I need some honest advice. Thanks.
How did your future mother in law react to your proposal?
My honey and I met 13 years ago today <3We met online - blind dates for both of us. It was special from the first moment. We went out to dinner, talked for hours - and then he took me home to meet his mother.With us both in our 50s, we were both caretakers for our mothers. This was something that we could really bond over.His mother was much more handicapped than mine. She was oxygen dependent, wheelchair bound, brittle diabetic. Mine had gone through a bout of cancer a few years back and was fiercely independent still.So I met his mother that first evening as she was sitting up in bed. She cranked her neck back and in her typical blunt fashion blurted, “my goodness you're a big girl!” I just smiled and agreed with her.We continued to date and fall hard for each other as Spring turned into Summer.On Mother's Day that year, his mother fell and broke her hip. We moved our courting to her bedside at the VA hospital. I began taking charge of more and more of her personal care.In June, he and I agreed we were both crazy about each other, so we planned a special celebratory dinner out.We took her to Red Lobster and treated her to her favorite crab legs…then I popped the question.Kim, may I have Kenneth's hand in marriage? I promise to love and cherish him, and care for you as long we live.Kim gave me the brightest, happiest smile I have ever seen and gave us her blessing.Kenneth and I married July 26, 2006, 48 hours after he had the first of many major surgeries that were in his future.We all moved in together Labor Day weekend and lived happily ever after.We lost my mom to another bout of cancer in 2009, and Kim to renal failure in 2010. Ken and I know how very blessed we were to have had their love with us.
How to deal with Nagging control-freak Mother-in-law who lives with us?
You're suffering Your wife is suffering Your child is suffering Your mother in law is having the time of her life! Why can't you ask her or force her to leave? You're both adults, yet this MIL is keeping your wife (and you, and your child) under her thumb like you're children... children with an overbearing, impossible to please mother! Your child is growing up with unhealthy ideas about relationships and about pleasing people. You MUST read this book: How to hug a porcupine - dealing with toxic and difficult to love personalities, By John L. Lund. It will really help. He explains all about people like your MIL - their toxic behaviour, why they do it, how you enable it, how to work with it or around it or how to accept that sometimes a safe relationship for you is no relationship at all, or a very limited one. I grew up with someone like your MIL... reading this book after I left home really, really helped me to understand my parent, and myself, and to set healthy boundaries for our relationship as adults. PLEASE read this book! Good luck!