I can't stand my brother, is this normal?
yes
Is it wrong to hate my mentally ill brother?
As stated above, he belittles you because he knows that as he is mentally ill his life is not going to go anywhere great. He is jealous of the fact the world is completely open to you, and wants to ruin your existence, the way his mental illness has marred his. Pity him. If he lashes out, just say, I pity you. It will hit him much harder than any physical or mental abuse. Its not wrong to hate him, blood is thicker than water, but that only goes so far. After years of abuse its natural that you will highly dislike him. He is just displacing his emotions onto you. Ignore him, don't give him the satisfaction of displacing his rage onto you what he craves. He still lives at home, because he cannot move anywhere else with his life. Pity him, and move on with your life. When he treats you better, be there for him. ~Chris
What do you think of a 50-year-old still living at home with his/her parents? He/she makes enough money to live on their own but have not separated yet.
Why not? The son can pay rent to the parents and help out with cost around the house. Also, this way, they only pay the utilities once (electric, water, heat, cable, etc). It is also convenient for the parents to have a young man around the house. And the son probably doesn't have to worry about cooking for himself.I say, keep the money in the family. Pay rent to your own parents for as long as you are single. Haha
Living a sheltered life, should i change?
all my life i've lived a sheltered life very few friends and very rarely left the house even when i was a kid. im a little afraid though if i do keep living this life being that im still a virgin at almost 24 and if i keep living this life i may be a virgin until at least 30. i feel like im losing out on so much yet im not because i know how people are in the world, especially since i have a lazy eye and fetal alcohol syndrome i know i can get surgery for my lazy eye to fix it but in a way i like it because it shows how people really are towards your looks and that's one of the reasons i stay home as much as i do. the biggest thing is sex for me, it looks so much fun and also the feeling i want to feel that at least once before i die im not saving myself for anyone it just has not happened yet although there was a girl when i was 14 that wanted to mess around but i told her no like an idiot.
My 31 year old brother still lives with my parents, jobless, what can i do to help him?
I have a similar situation. My brother who's 37 still lives at home with my parents who are retired and only living on social security. I would get so mad at him and my parents for allowing this. My mom would complain that she never had any extra money and I would tell her to make my brother get a job and help out. After several years of this, my parents finally had had enough and made him grow up and get a job. He now has a job and helps with the household expenses. Until you dad and his wife decide enough is enough, things probably won't change. There's is really nothing you can do to change the situation. Good luck though.
My 30 year old older brother is immature and it's really getting on my nerves?
I'm a 22 year old girl and I have an older brother (almost 30) who is driving me crazy. He is very emotionally detached from our family and does not think when it comes to other people's feelings. He is also very immature for his age - he has not moved out of the house, even though he has a condo that my mom pushed him to get in order to get his life rolling. The job that is currently has was kindly given to him by a stranger that he ran into - he doesn't see the need to send this women cards or keep in contact with her. In fact, my mom keeps in contact with her b/c she feels bad. The list goes on. These days, I feel as though I've developed quite a temper. I never used to be this way, but sometimes I can't help but be a little snappy to him. I'm religious and I know that praying is something that I should do, but how do I deal with him? Going out to dinner as a family (all four of us), is very awkward b/c he doesn't talk to us. We've made an effort to explain how important family is but he just doesn't get it. I feel as though he takes complete advantage of my mom and dad and by now, he should be trying to act like a 30 year old man. I'm 23, completed university and currently in grad school. I have high ambitions for myself. He doesn't want to work very hard for much. He also does even care to ask what I'm doing in school. I don't think it crosses his mind..... How do you DEAL WITH THIS??
At what age is it ridiculous to still live with your parents (my brother is 32)?
I don’t think there’s any rule for this, since different people have different needs. Someone who can’t get a good job, for example, may have to stay at home, or someone who is handicapped or ill.Also, remember, that through much of our history, we didn’t have the custom of leaving home. If you followed in your Dad’s footsteps as a farmer, say, chance are you and your entire extended family lived in the farmhouse. The notion that people should inevitably leave is a modern one and carries with it social costs as well as economic benefits. In many traditional human societies, it would be considered unfortunate or even wrong, since family members help one another out, taking care of the kids, or the ill, or parents in old age.Where it does I think become an issue is where the person is just being lazy or is somehow too scared to leave home when it’s the right course for him. But even then, who’s to say? Your brother may have good reasons for his choice.
Is it normal for a 40-year-old to still be living with their parents?
… Its not normal no; at least not in the western world (that I know of). If I did hear of such a situation I’d wonder if the person was mooching of his or her parents and taking advantage of the fact that they’d been unable to force him or her to move out. But there are a some clear exceptions;There are cultures where unmarried children are expected to remain living at home until they find a spouse. And even then they might still be expected to remain living with their parents after their marriage and even as they have their own children.There are financial and or practical reasons+ for the situation. But if thats the case I’d expect the 40 year old to pay his share of the bills (including groceries) as well as share in the full load of the household chores (or otherwise be an invaluable part of the household that either party (child/parents) truly can’t part with for whatever reason and everyone involved is comfortable and happy with that).The person is physically and or mentally challenged/handicapped and are therefore unable to care for themselves properly and require regular caretakers/visitors or even 24/7 care and either won’t get or can’t afford such care where he or she lives if the 40 year old moves out.Perhaps he/she has been forced to move back into the family home after loosing their job/apartment or other. I’d then expect them to move out again as soon as they are able to do so.Other reason I’ve not thought about and or are aware of.including renting an apartment/house+ from the parents.. which is not the same thing as living with them though, regardless of it being over the garage or on the same property. (as long as they do pay a decent rent and also buy their own groceries, pay their own bills and such).… While an adult son or daughter can have their reasons for living at home.. Overall I’d expect them to either still go to school (and the parents living close enough to the school to be convenient+) or to find a proper job and then pay a rent of some kind. By 40… Either there’s a good reason or the parents may need to set their foot down and stop allowing themselves to be taken advantage of.