My fiance and I can't agree on wedding plans at all. He wants to basically elope, and I want a small wedding.?
His family is from California and has said, in no uncertain terms, that they will not be there at the wedding if we have it in South Carolina, where I am from. My dream is to have a small wedding with family and close friends in the town where I am from in South Carolina and then later have a nice reception in California for his extended family and our coworkers and friends. We are both living in California now, but it would be no problem for us to go back to SC for the wedding. We are now at a standstill because he refuses to have a wedding--even a small one--if his family isn't there. He suggests we have just my parents (because my dad would be our officiant) and two of our friends and then later have a reception for everyone else. That breaks my heart, though, because I have three siblings (two with spouses) who would not be invited to the ceremony if we do it my fiance's way. He says it's not fair to his family to have even a small wedding if they can't or won't be there. I don't think it's fair to exclude my siblings and aunts and uncles just because his family can't or won't be there. I don't think it's fair for him to ask me to give up my dream of a wedding. He has said over and over that he doesn't care how it happens as long as it happens. Now he says he doesn't care how it happens as long as it's as fair as possible to both families. I understand that getting married isn't about the day so much as the marriage, and I agree with that 100%. But I don't want to give up my dream of having a wedding and of being my sweetheart's bride. I have looked forward to that since I was probably 15 years old. It's a once-in-a-lifetime experience that I don't want to feel sad about missing out on later down the road. Am I being completely selfish and ridiculous?? Any words of wisdom would be much appreciated. It seems like we are on the verge of not getting married at all because we are at such a standstill.
Me and my fiancé cant decide on a wedding plan?
my fiancé wants glitz and glamour huge venue and the very best food. I want something modest, small venue, and I also want to wear a beautiful black wedding dress which he made fun of me for. He claims he wont have quote " poor red neck wedding" but to me I don't want all the glitz and glamour I tried to compromise maybe have a middle-level wedding humble but still magical. he flat out refused the wedding planning has been nothing but fighting. i dont want to wear a dress i dont like a venue i hate and just be unhappy my wedding day. i dont wanna put my foot down though and cause further argument honestly my wedding has become nothing but a pest that im ready to just get over with :(
My fiancé doesn't want a big wedding but I do. Is there any way I can convince him?
Well, not only was I married for 33 years, but I met many people who married, divorced, had kids, lost kids. The whole nine yards. Oh, and weddings. Lots of weddings.You want to know how you can convince your fiance to have a big wedding.Let me take a moment to give you some advice you didn’t ask for: If you aren’t willing to compromise, you shouldn’t expect it from others.The other thing I want to tell you is be careful what you push through an unwilling partner. While you actively work for what you want you can sow the seeds of resentment in the other person.That said, all I can suggest is you address your fiance’s concern. If it’s cost, or number of guests, or the nightmare of details, try to work with him to reduce that problem. You may have to lower your expectations. You might not have as many invites, you might have to work hard to pinch pennies, you may have to streamline the process so you aren’t running your fiance and yourself ragged with details.Good luck.
My fiance wants to wear a kilt to the wedding and I really do not want this, is there anything I can do?
He is not Scottish and this has nothing to do with his culture. He latley has been obsessed with the new interest of the moment of learning to play the bagpipes. Usually he gets all hyped up about something for a while and then he moves on to something else. Well the bagpipe thing has been going on for a year now and he joined a police pipe band and plays at funerals in his "dress" kilt. I think it is grat that he got so good and support him playing in the band, but now he wants to wear the kilt to our wedding and I think this will just look stupid. I just always pictured him in a nice tux and would hate for our pictures to be about the fad of the moment and I am embarrased to have him dress this way for our wedding. It looks great when performing, I just dont think it is appropriate for this occasion and feels like he is not taking this seriously. He is very insistant and says I get to pick my dress so he should get to pick what he wears. Am I wrong to want a say in what he wears?
Baby Nephew not welcome at wedding?
A.) You and your fiance are paying for your own wedding. It sounds like you don't have financial support from either sets of parents. Therefore, it's your wedding, you invite who you want, you set the tone for the wedding. B.) You have made an exception so the child feels welcome at some parts of the wedding. This is more than most people who have said "no kids" would have done. This is both admirable and respectable, and in my opinion, a reasonable compromise. Those things being said, just by making that compromise with his sister, you will have to compromise for other couples who have children. If word gets out that you made this solution for your future sister in law, you will have trouble convincing other new mothers that they can't bring their children. When you say, "no kids", it should be exactly that - no children during the entire duration. I babysat when I was a teenager. I don't see the huff about letting someone else watch your children for an evening. If you can't afford $30.00 for an evening of hiring a babysitter, perhaps you should not have RSVP'd "yes" to the wedding. I don't see any reason why parents wouldn't want a night out to themselves, especially if they're new parents. My wedding is a no children wedding. My fiance and I are saving for a large down payment on a home, as well as contributing to a travel fund for ourselves. We are paying for this wedding out of pocket and refuse to assume any debt whatsoever for it. Adding children to the reception adds chaos and extra costs that we just aren't willing to pay. I do not want children running around at a formal event. I'm sure many others agree with me. It doesn't mean that I don't love my cousins or my friend's children - I do. Some parents just don't understand that even though they love their children and others do too, your decision does not reflect on them personally. I think you've made a good choice and you sound very reasonable and understanding. Good luck in what ever you decide to do, but do not let her whining bring you down. You are planning a wedding. You have enough to worry about.