My friend is controlling/obsessed with me?
This is a tough situation. What I would do, is introduce her to someone new to also hang out / talk to. (Maybe she only has a couple friends and she feels lonely / shy). If that doesn't work, talk it out; tell her what she's doing is bothering you, and if she doesn't lay off, tell her there will be consequences. An example of a consequence would be, not talking to her for a while (this may give her some time to think about what she's doing is wrong). Don't give in to her yelling. If she starts yelling at you, then either tell her (in a calm voice) to stop or walk away. (Phone: kind-of hard to ignore; Facebook: Delete / block her (if only it gets really bad)). When she times you, that is really creepy. Tell her to knock it off and if she doesn't, use the consequence idea again. I would feel exhausted in the friendship too, but giving up is not the best solution.
How can I help my friend control how much she eats? She wants to lose weight, but she eats way too many calories and I've tried to limit her consumption, but now she complains of hunger
100 Calories of broccoli has more protein than 100 calories of steak! The best part......no antibiotics or hormones! pic.twitter.com/Eg79FAl9Xo— Dr. Ara Suppiah (@draraoncall) September 26, 2013For some people, the secret to getting healthier is not in controlling quantity but improving quality. We humans can keep stuffing ourselves with raw plain fresh whole leafy greens all day and night and not gain weight because leafy greens have enough water and fiber to keep us occupied. However, the leafy greens have to be whole and fresh (no juicing, no drying, no freezing, and so on), and they have to be plain (no dressing or croutons). One piece of advice that my parents (who are healthcare professionals) like to give is that, if your weight is out of control, you need to eat more—eat more vegetables, that is.So, don’t limit the quantity of food. Instead, encourage her to eat more foods that are high in fiber and water first. Personally, I don’t like leafy greens much, but I love celery sticks, broccoli stalks, tomatoes, cucumbers, bell peppers, and other fresh whole vegetables. It’s useful to snack on vegetables first before reaching for other snacks. It’s even more useful to try drinking filtered water first when hungry, or if the water in the area doesn’t taste very good, try home-made natural herbal teas or fruit infusions that don’t have any added sugars, like cucumber-infused water, ginger-infused water, or water with a spritz of lemon.It’s a lot easier to reduce the quantity of high-calorie low-nutrition food if we make it a priority to eat a lot of low-calorie high-nutrition foods like vegetables first. When limiting quantity is hard, improving quality can help a lot in improving overall health. Instead of limiting consumption, drink more water, eat more fiber, and improve the quality of the food overall.
How do I help my best friend cope with strict and controlling parents the hard way?
Not a lot. They are the parents, and if your friend is still underage and living in their house, they are the authorities there.You might be able to soften them a little, (a very little, over time), in order to help your friend do something special. Visit their home. Be respectful, polite, interested in them. Do it several times in the weeks leading up to the event. Then, casually in conversation, mention the event as something you are looking forward to. Leave it at that. A couple of visits later, mention it again. Talk about what a great experience it will be, maybe any educational benefits available there. Then, ask your friend’s parents if they would consider allowing your friend to go to the event with you.They may say no. But if you accept their refusal with good grace, you will still be able to visit. After the event, show them photos of what you did and let them see that it really was a worthwhile event.It may make the next time you ask have a better outcome.Some people take a lot of buttering-up.
How do I tell a controlling friend that I just do not want to be friends anymore in a nice way without hurting her feelings?
Oh wow - I’m laughing at the 3 guys that answered while I was also writing my answer. Especially Donald Cook’s answer: Have clear boundaries, and don't do crap out of guilt. It’s a common malady among women that they don’t need.lolBut we live and die for guilt!!! hahahaI had the same experience with a codependent friend and she just kept calling and texting and calling and texting. Finally I picked up the phone, let her go on and on for about an hour then I finally had the courage to say:Angela (not her real name), I think I need to let you go. I love you so much but I think that our lives are so different now. I know you are still pissed about your divorce that ended 4 years ago and this was all great while I was going through mine 2 years ago but I gotta tell you, this just isn’t the same anymore. I think I’ve moved on and you still want to have the ‘I hate my ex’ party. Was my ex an asshole? Absolutely. Have we made up and things are great now? Nope - not even close.What I do know is that having conversations bashing him is EXHAUSTING. It’s like ugh! Get that “I hate my ex” sign off my back! The thing is, I feel like I’ve changed and found new ways of dealing with people like him and I left you at the party. I love you so much for being there when I needed you most.Of course it didn’t go that smoothly and she interrupted as often as she could but I just kept at it without addressing her diversions like “Oh nice! What are you really saying? I’m a bitch??!!”Me: Well if you’ll let me continue… again, I love you SO MUCH - this is really hard for me to do…Her: So are you going to be blocking me on Facebook and Instagram? What the fuck?!Me: (calmly) That’s not what I said. You’re making this really hard. Can you please just listen?Finally she understood and was like “So - what - can I call you when I’m getting MARRIED?” (She wasn’t even dating at the time)Me: I’m just going to ask for some time. I know you love me just as much as I love you. I’m not even going to say goodbye. I have to go for now but I want to end this call right. I’m not mad at you. I don’t hate you. I still think you’re an amazing mom and friend I just need to go ok?Her: okMe: I love you girl.Her: ok, I love you too.Click.I haven’t heard from her in 5 months. We’re still friends on facebook and instagram. I just don’t use those accounts as much anymore. It’s really hard to not react and feed into her controlling ways.Hope this suggestion helps. Thank you for the A2A. Good luck to you!
I feel like my best friend controls me?
Sometimes my friend acts like she is the boss of me. I don't like that about her. Sometimes she annoys me, Ill be like Im going to talk to whoever and she'll be like NO. She makes all my decisions and I don't want her to do this. Plus whenever we are walking somewhere with my other best friend ( there's 3 of us) She ALWAYS has to be in the middle because shes a jealous weirdo. And a rude self centered mean girl. And she ALWAYS brags about everything, Whenever she gets something from Juicy Couture she brags on and on about it!. And one thing annoying about her is that all she ever talks and cares about is Juicy Couture, Coach, True Religion. She always puts me down too, she always says that Im chubby, and have to big front teeth that stick out:( She really made me have doubts about our friendship when she said that. Does it seem that she is controlling, rude, annoying?? I am having serious doubts about our friendship:( HELP
My best friend of 12 years has been controlling my relationships, I tried to talk to her about it and she cried. What should I do?
Call your friend up and APOLOGIZE TO HER.Before you hate me for saying this, let me explain.You called and accused your friend of “controlling” your love life and were finally standing up for yourself and asserting your ownership of your love life…good for you, but in the process of accusing her of controlling your life you forgot being responsible for that NOBODY CAN CONTROL YOUR LIFE.People say things (sometimes even forcefully) but you are not obligated to do what they say to do and you did. You created an opening for her ‘advice’ (direction/control/suggestions) to be what drove YOUR choices regarding your love life and now, all of the sudden, you want to re-take control of it (good for you) but are blaming her for everything that didn’t work before (bad for you).If you say something like: “You have been giving me guidance/direction regarding my love life for the past 12 years and while I’m thankful for your interest, it hasn’t worked for me to follow your advice. I value you as a friend but from this point on, I will call the shots in my own life. I hope you can understand this” you will be better off.Hope everything turns out well.
Why do my friends try to control MY love life?
Okay, so, I'm 14 and I love this boy, even though we're not dating. I know he likes me, as he looks at me in class and such. Well, I have a couple of friends that are trying to control MY love life. I tell them I love him, and they tell me: "You're only in eighth grade, you don't love him." But, I do. I can't fight my heart and my feelings, and why are they trying to change me? I never try to change them! I accept their thoughts, feelings, and personality. Am I not allowed to love? I don't even feel like they're my friends anymore, which is sad. Why are they trying to control my love life, thoughts, etc.?