I don't get along with my mother in law, how do I keep my husband out of the middle of it all?
Really, I'm not going to go into detail about all the stupid things that make me not like my mother in law. The list is long. My question is more about my husband. I don't want him to get caught in the middle, and I try everything to keep him out of it, but, of course, he does get stuck there sometimes. The latest problem was that my MIL took my daughter without my permission or knowlege for 10 hours. I was frantic with worry when I woke up and found my daughter was gone. After my husband called his mother, and reamed her out, did she decide to drop her back off at home, after she agrued about it. Long story short, I was so mad at this woman, and freaked out about my missing kid, that I was yelling, screaming and in tears. My husband feels that I take out how mad I am at her on him. Which, I don't feel that I do. I'll admit, I am a shouter. When I get mad, I yell. Thats me. I don't yell at him, I don't blame him, I don't point fingers at him, I'm just mad at the situation. I can't talk to her and straighten this out. It has gone so far beyond that point. She refuses to talk to me, as she thinks she never does anything wrong. And of corse, my husband, in her eyes, is a saint. He really is a good guy, I don't have any complaints. I do love him dearly. However, the problems I have with her (and vise versa) are starting to stress him out a bit. He is very understanding, and always takes my side, and defends me to her. Its getting to be a strain, as she does stupid things almost daily. I don't complain about her constantly, and I'm not a ******. I'm not a winer, or overly sensitive. It's just when she does her constant interferring, and overstepping of the boundries, I get mad. What can I do to keep him from feeling torn between me and his mom? How can I be more sensitive about it all when it comes to him? I have no intention of playing nice with her, but what can I do to make it better for him? Any ideas?
What should I do about my mother? She has no regard for my feelings. Sometimes I want to just give up on her.?
Hi, I am in your same situation. I feel exactly like you do. Some people dont understand that a mother's behavior can be deeply hurtful even if she doesnt hit you or sexually abuse you. Sometimes I feel I have no right to feel anger towards her, yet feelings are feelings, we shouldnt feel guilty about it. Your mom is sending you the message that she doesnt care about you. I think that your mom is suffering for some reason (not having the support of a spouse, lack of friends, whatever reason) and she doesnt have the ability to provide you with the relationship that you need from her. Maybe trying to build friendships with others will help you supply that care that you would like from your mom. You may not be able to have a close relationship with your mother (if she never changes) but you may be able to heal by filling the emotinal emptiness that your mom has left and someday accept her just the way she is, with her flaws and positives.
What are the last things I should do with my dying mother?
Alright! I'm writing this as a guy who has been there and done that. I lost my Mother three years back. Mom was suffering from Thyroid cancer since many years. When she had an operation in 1997, doctors said that She could live hardly for 6 years, but my Mom survived for more than their estimation. To be honest, I didn't know that my Mother was suffering from such a deadly disease. My Dad never let us (me and my brother) know about it. He kept on giving treatments to her without any hesitation. And finally one day (that was the last day of my graduation) I lost my Mom. The pain was horrible. Irreplaceable, dude. People say moving on with life is easy, but no. It's very, very tough. Anyways, with these experiences, I'm going to write what could be done to make your Mother happy at her end days.Death is inevitable. Try to make the last days as memorable as you can. Spend more time with her. Tell her how important She is to you. Grant all the wishes she want to.Try to stay away from the things/incidents that make you guys sad and depressed.Make a reunion of family and the one who missed out all these days.Try to make her meet with whomever she want. Her childhood friends, long distance relatives.Avoid talking to death. If she want to talk about it, then it's okay.Take her to new places. Introduce her to new people, new cultures, new languages. These things make her excited. Atlast, keep Her happy all the time. The best treatment that a person deserves is to be happy as much as he can.God Bless.
How do you say Happy Mother's Day to some one who should not be having a baby?
My sister's daughter is having another baby with a new boyfriend that just got out of prison. My sister is acting like this is wonderful. The girl won't work or go to school and she already has a 5 year old she has dumped on her mother and grandmother who now take care of that child. Now she and her unemployed ex con boyfriend are having a baby. I think my sister is paying their rent now in addition to keeping the first child. I think this is a disaster and the girl should not be having any more children. I have seen her in action, she is a terrible mother and the first child is far better off away from her. I fear for this new little baby and my clueless niece but my sister thinks this is all just fine and dandy. Is she crazy or am I? We are having dinner tommorrow with our mother and I just do not know what to say about it all.
My mom said she won't ever talk to me because I misbehaved, what should I do?
Well in a state of anger and frustration people tend to say something which comes out from their mouth but they don’t really mean that way especially with the case of every mother.Out of frustration and anger so that their child must be in the right path they say something in anger and we shall not take them seriously instead understand the MOTHER’S pain and make her happy all the time.I don’t who are the true well-wishers but a MOTHER is always a well-wisher for their child because if you are successful they are the first person to be happy in this whole world and at the same time if you fail they are the ones who will be behind you always.When your mother is angry stay calm and relaxed and maintain a smile on your face then she will pacified easily.Smile easily vanishes the anger away. A MOTHER never curses any bad things upon their child but instead scold them in order to bring them in the right track and platform.THIS SOCIETY HAS WITNESSED LOT OF BAD WOMEN AND GIRLS BUT WE HAVE NEVER WITNESSED A BAD MOTHER(ESPECIALLY IN INDIA).
My pushy, opinionated, overbearing, smelly mother-in-law?
Ouch. Wow. I had my first child a month after I turned 18 (I'm almost double that now and have 3) My mother in law thought she knew everything and I knew she was wrong. We had alot of power struggles. Keep standing up to her when she over steps her boundaries. It is a fine line between being over sensitive and assertive. Be assertive! 1. Cut her out of the info loop. Do not discuss finances with her and make sure your husband does not either. If she asks questions, tell her you'd rather keep that private for now, but that you'll remember her concern and will be sure to tell her if you need help. (cuts both ways) 2. Tell her that buying a house would be great, but it just isn't going to work out right now and you're trying to work on a down payment for now. Renting is what is working good for your family. 3. Maintain your boundaries. Don't answer the phone after a certain hour and if she shows up unannounced, make sure you mention that you weren't expecting any company right now. 4. Tell her that your rules have to be followed for your children. This is really where it gets tough and the older generation has a hard time. This is your turn to raise your child and you will always consider what she has to say, however YOU have the final say. Don't deliver any ultimatums unless you absolutely can't avoid it. Put sunscreen on the baby before you leave. It lasts awhile. Tell her you put it on because you were trying to save her the "effort". 5. There isn't really anything you can do about her personal hygeine. The baby is too young to really mind and kisses are very good for everyone. You can certainly request that she not kiss the baby on the mouth, but be sure other people don't do it in front of her. 6. I know you said alot more stuff that needs to be addressed here, but be careful what you say about her especially when it comes to your husband. Even if he acts like he hates her or something (which I doubt), he will harbor bad feelings if you bash her too much. Try to be open with him without actually saying anything insulting. You really need him to back you up when it comes to his mom. All of us go through this to some extent, but it sounds like you might really have a problem here. I will say again that it is very important that you and your husband discuss this and get it straight that you need him to back you up.