My father criticizes everything I do?
I am 33 years old. Have been dealing with mental health issues since I was a kid bc I had to grow up with my dad abusing, yelling and criticizing everything. My mental health has gotten a little better over the years due to years of counseling. I have come a long way have my own place, work and am engaged to be married with zero help from him bc he has is super cheap and never has done a single thing for me financially. Bc he is obsessed with his money and doesnt want to spend a dime. Even after having to accept all this he still acts like im 12 like I dont know how to do anything right. He thinks im not ready for marrage and that I will divorce and that my future husband will leave me and the state will take my kids away. He doesnt even acknowledge my Fiancee. Funny thing he has been divorced for 20 years from my mother. Now hes sick with MS and he always says when he ends up in a wheel chair which will be very soon he needs all my help or else hes not leaving me anything. Help what do I do? I want to help my father not bc of money but bc im his daughter but he never respects me. How do I tell him i dont want to take care of him when hes dying bc hes to much of an asshole?
What should you do if your parents criticize every decision you make in life?
Damn…I shouldn’t be answering you but let’s look at the extreme and then reasonable things you could do:You could tell them to F-off (that would piss them off)You could become a recluse and refuse to talk to themYou could pull constant pranks on them to freak them outYou could runaway and become homelessYou could cut all your hair off as some sign of insanityFirst there is a difference between calling you an idiot and implying you’re one. There is a difference between being nosy and attempting to look out for your well-being. There is a difference between being wrong versus naive in your youth.If you’re parents are that rotten they probably are frustrated with either each other, life in general, or possibly your insincerity with them.My best advice, serve out sentence with them, read positive books, don’t go into pity party mode, and get to college to make your mark in life. But, do not become a mental case over this, it’s not like your the only young person that has these issues!THINGS COULD BE WORSE!
Is it right for my mom to constantly criticise everything I do?
I’m not sure you are asking the right question yet. Of course it’s not “right” for one person to bombard another with constant criticism. However, you can’t force her to stop. Your only choice in this situation is how you respond. I don’t know how old you are, but the older you are the more choices you have. Your choices range from doing what you have always done, and continuing to tolerate her criticism … to completely cutting off contact with her. There are a lot of steps in between those two as well.Some of the things to consider when deciding how you are going to respond to your mother going forward:Are there good things about your relationship that balance the excessive criticism?Are you dependent on your mother for things like financial support? Also, are you more dependent on her than is usual for people your age?Do you have a father who is active in both your life and your mother’s life? Do you feel criticized by him as well? Could you talk to him about the situation?Do you have other family members that could help you figure out how to respond to your mom? What about friends?What do you think motivates your mother? Is she genuinely concerned about you and thinks that constantly criticizing is helping, or is she malicious? You have a sense of who she is, outside of the criticism.
My parents criticize everything I do and I can't take it anymore!?
Well if you don't want to live like that you will HAVE to move out. Where? who knows, you said you have friends so ask them if you can live with them for awhile until you can get a job and move out. Try getting a girlfriend too. Good luck.
Why does my dad have to be so strict and criticize everything I do?
Hi, I want a bit of advice here. Because I'm lost and really starting to get pissed with my dad. Ever since I can remember, all he does, all day and night, is yell at me and criticize EVERYTHING that I do. I mean everything. I'll go and play hockey someday. While my mom, sister, and grandparents say, "Great Job!" he'll have something to criticize. "You didn't check enough," or "You stickhandled too much." What the hell? Just today, I woke up early and took a 10 minute shower to wake myself up and he went crazy. He told me he timed me at 15 minutes, which he did not. When I left my bedroom to go to the shower, it was 6:14 and when I got back it was 6:25, and the time I spent in there included getting out, taking off my clothes, etc. Now he's charging me to take showers. I'm 14 f*cking years old. 50 cents per minute over 10. He's really strict too. He always emails my teachers and if my grades aren't impeccable he goes nuts. He overreacts about everything. Just the other day, he told me to shut his laptop down for him, so I pressed "shut down" and closed the top once the screen turned black. Apparently I didn't do it "his way" and got screamed at. I don't really spend that much time with him because I don't want to get embarrassed in public. He's already embarrassed me in public plenty of times. Let me give you a few examples: yelling at church, yelling at the beach, yelling at my grandmothers house, etc. I do not know what sets him off because my mom and sister are fine with pretty much everything I do. I may break a small rule here and there, but they don't see much of it. My dad goes crazy and screams about everything. So please, post something if you can help me. I'm really tired of his crap. Thanks
My parents criticize me for my weight?
my parents are constantly criticizing me for my weight, that i'm fat and everything, and are constantly getting on me about what i eat...even when i'm really not eating! i'm secretly eating 500 cals a day, but they keep yelling at me if i ask for anything to eat--even if it's carrots or celery. it's hard for me to stick to my diet when they're messing it up so much. also, i KNOW i'm FAT, i'm 5'0" and 100 frickin' lbs for god's sake! but i'm TRYING to lose weight, and i've lost 10 lbs (i was 110 before.. even GROSSER), but i hate that they comment on my FAT all the time! what can i do to avoid going nuts while i lose weight?
My dad criticizes everything I do and yells at me even though I don't yell at him. I am 36 years old. Why should I respect him?
I will give you reasons ranging from least to most important.Under the assumption that you still live with your parents (you mentioned him yelling and criticizing everything you do, meaning that it is happening often and that is bothering you enough to ask this question here), at 36 you haven't moved out yet. There may or may not be reasons for that but the bigger picture is that you are still reliant on his support. The fact that he still has you in his house is sufficient for you to respect him.-Note if you don't live with him disregard what has been said previously.Ask yourself this one question: “Has my father ever wronged me in any way that would cause me to actually fully lose respect for him?” The answer is most likely no since what bothered you oh so very much is how he merely criticizes and yells at you, not, for instance how he could be a drunkard that abuses you and your mother while threatening to kill you both for money to buy more alcohol/drugs. Parents in general love their children to death and growing up does not mean that said love is discontinued.Here is the most obvious reason why: He is your father. He wants he best for you, he yells most likely because what you're doing is not good for you. Even if you aren't doing anything wrong and you were an angel, you must still love and care for your father and RESPECT him because he brought you up and took care of you as a child.
Is it wrong to criticize your parents?
It depends. Parents are expected to be smarter, understanding and wiser than you. If they have these qualities, then there isn't really much need to criticize them. HOWEVER If they lack these qualities I will not hesitate to show them. This is speaking from personal experience where I lived with my father and saw him consistently do things that would make an 15 year seem like a sage. Retire with a mere 100k when he had all sorts of bills, prioritizing going to the bar during a trip when we had one last bit of business to take care of, Mixing bleach and ammonia in the bathroom, and generally dismissing EVERYTHING i say even when I produce the proof or logic to back it up all on the grounds of "He always know what he's going" or "I've been doing this from before you were born" Both idiotic arguments. No amount of experience can justify doing stupid things like mixing dirty pans ("only the oil and flour I used to keep the cake from sticking in there" he says) with clean ones which resulted in a roach problem. Frankly, i have my father the barest minimum of respect because he consistently shows that he is not worthy of A lot of it.But even the most level headed of parents need to be criticized should the need arise. If they are not, they will just continue to make the same mistake or make you work harder than needed. The problem is that people tend to think that being criticized is disrespectful when it isn't. That is just the arrogance of older people who think that just because they've been on the earth longer younger people can't say anything to them. And that might be true to a point, but after someone reaches 18-20 years,they should at least be able to correct their parents when they are flat out wrong (like thinking ignorant (in the context of them not knowing about a particular subject) and stupid means the same thing). My outlook on this subject would be a bit different than most because i grew up around elders (not just my father) who honestly believe that what i say is worth less than dirt. These are situations where I know what they are doing is unneeded, or there is a better way, but is always ""I been doing this for years I know what i'm doing". Yet somehow my friend and i are able to produce better result than them in things like gardening and fixing cars.
My mom criticizes everything. She is never happy with anything. HELP!!?
There are many factors as to why your mom is always putting you down: 1) She feels she has failed you as a mother 2) She is a perfectionist 3) Your mom loves doing things and still sees you as a little baby. 4) Your mom wants you to make her feel she is needed in your life. 5) Your mom wants you to have the lifestyle she never had so she does that through you. All your failures are her failures. If you love your mom a lot, accept the way she is especially if you know deep down inside she loves you a lot. Tell her you are happy with the way things are going in your life, avoid telling her downfalls you are having so she won't be nagging you to be a perfect daughter.