Social Anxiety : School issues. (LONG)?
I'M IN THE SAME EXACT BOAT. I'm a sixteen year old girl and I've been like that since I was about thirteen. I'm really insecure, not to mention. I seriously was self conscious about the way I would WALK. I always felt like people were watching me, and I absolutely had no friends. I moved from Cincinnati to a small town in Maine. And then I moved schools four different times in a year. I won't even eat lunch because I'm scared people will think I'm fat and gross. When people try to talk to me, I never know what to say. Never. I just smile and nod and walk away. I went to my cousin's wedding recently. I met five new people at once and I ran away crying because I was so scared of people! At school I skip classes and lunch, just so I don't have to be near people. I practically have panic attacks in the hallway. I remember when I was new at the school I'm at now, and these three girls came to talk to me, and they were really nice. But I just smiled and said a bunch of awkward crap so they gave me a weird look and never talked to me again. I dread school. I really just can't stand it. I recently got ringworm from a stupid field trip, and everyone thinks I'm really gross and whispers about all the spots on my neck. As for advice, I wish I could give you some, All I know is, to help me cope, I made a tumblr, painted, and played music. Tumblr is the best place for the socially awkward. And art just kind of was my escape. You really should e-mail me sometime. We could be like... Weirdo-Awkward penpals. :) I know how it feels to want someone to talk to, because I don't have anyone myself, And it would definitely help. thechippysnuggler@yahoo.com Really.
Why is my social anxiety so bad?
My social anxiety is not as bad as it was, but it is still on the extreme side. As a person with a social disorder, I hate crowds and strangers. I hate crowds and strangers, like the Nazis hated Jews. I hate when people stare at me. That sends my social anxiety through the roof. I hate when strangers talk to me and walk up to me. I automatically get into defense mode, because I don't know what their intentions are. I have very deep seated trust issues. Therefore, when a stranger approaches me, I get anxious because I don't know if they have something up their sleeves. I don't know if they're just being nice to gain my confidence, so that they can ease their way in. I really don't trust people. I don't believe that people are ever just "being nice". I believe that they always have a motive. Whenever people are being nice, it is for selfish reasons. Whether it is because they want to make themselves believe that they are good people, or they want something in return, I don't know. But I have really bad social anxiety and trust issues. Are you experiencing this? If so, what are you doing to bring it down a little?
When did you realise you have social anxiety?
I knew the first time I heard about Social Anxiety Disorder (SAD) some time during university. I’d always had it, that was just the first time I realized it actually had a name and that it wasn’t unique to me.Shortly after, I met up with a friend studying psychology and asked her if she knew about SAD. The first thing she said - very firmly - was, “You don’t have SAD.” I meekly agreed with her, but in my head I was thinking, “You just don’t think so because I’m good at hiding it.”I probably wanted to believe her though, and didn’t really think about it again until it became much worse during my (unhappy) marriage, where I’d gotten far too used to always having someone with me in a new place or a public setting.The first time in a couple years that I actually had to go to an unfamiliar train station all by myself to meet up with my husband, my legs were trembling so bad I thought I would fall down the stairs. I was so afraid the station attendants were watching me, and that one of them would come and talk to me, either to ask what I was doing or whether I needed help or if I was lost. It was irrational.Also, when I started driving on my own again (my husband always drove our one car while we were married), it stunned me to discover that all the confidence I’d had with driving prior to marriage was gone. I could still drive the car, but I was a nervous wreck because of all the other drivers around me. I was afraid they would rage at me, honk at me, overtake me for being too slow, and just generally think bad things about me and my driving skills. It was also irrational.Once I got used to these situations again these severe reactions/feelings went away. But I do still have social anxiety.
How to get out of gym class permanently(social anxiety issues/self injury)?
Talk with your therapist about the specific problem with gym, if the med's help it would be good for you to experience things you're afraid of but only with help. Maybe there's a compromise, is it the gym clothes? A lot of schools are not strict on what counts as "dressing out". Anyway, your therapist could talk with the school counselor about accommodations. Such as only participating part time, or in a different way, like being an assistant. In some schools you can take health instead, Or what if you suggested doing your own project and reporting it to the teacher/coach. If you worked in the library to research during gym and exercise on your own time, you could chart your "progress", like running time and endurance, for example. Anyway, I think if your therapist works with the school, (which they should) and you come up with a fair and smart project or idea, maybe this might help you ease into gym later on as well as develop some confidence and experience success. One, know your rights, if you have a panic/anxiety disorder the school has to accommodate you. It's the law, if you have a diagnosis! (I've been a high school teacher) If you have good teachers and counselors they will work with you. If not, they need to be made to, I hope it's the former. Second, it will help them if they know you are really trying, you're suffering, not lazy, you're not trying to get out of anything, except another panic attack. Be your own advocate, if people see you trying and taking initiative, most of them will listen. Best wishes, and let us know if you get this resolved, ok.
How to get out of gym class permanently(social anxiety issues/self injury)?
I have to take gym next semester in high school, and I wondering if social anxiety/self injury is a justifiable explanation to get out of it. It isn't that I'm "lazy" and I don't like to "exercise", I do - I strength train and do cardio all the time, I eat fairly healthy, and I'm at a healthy weight. However, I suffer from extreme anxiety and anxiety attacks. I used to have gym once a week in middle school and every day that I had gym, not only was I a panicky anxious mess for the period, but I was panicky and anxious for the entire day. I also tend to self mutilate as an escape from the anxiety and I have obvious scars on my thighs and upper arms. I'm currently seeing a therapist for my anxiety(I also am scheduled to see a psychiatrist to get antianxiety meds in the next couple of months as well). Does anyone think it's a justifiable reason to skip gym because of that? Is there anything that I can do to lessen the anxiety? We had a pep-ralley in the school gym and I threw up after it because of the pure anxiety of being in the gym room; I don't want to have to feel like that every single day for a whole semester.
How to get out of gym class permanently(social anxiety issues/self injury)?
I have to take gym next semester in high school, and I wondering if social anxiety/self injury is a justifiable explanation to get out of it. It isn't that I'm "lazy" and I don't like to "exercise", I do - I strength train and do cardio all the time, I eat fairly healthy, and I'm at a healthy weight. However, I suffer from extreme anxiety and anxiety attacks. I used to have gym once a week in middle school and every day that I had gym, not only was I a panicky anxious mess for the period, but I was panicky and anxious for the entire day. I also tend to self mutilate as an escape from the anxiety and I have obvious scars on my thighs and upper arms. I'm currently seeing a therapist for my anxiety(I also am scheduled to see a psychiatrist to get antianxiety meds in the next couple of months as well). Does anyone think it's a justifiable reason to skip gym because of that? Is there anything that I can do to lessen the anxiety? We had a pep-ralley in the school gym and I threw up after it because of the pure anxiety of being in the gym room; I don't want to have to feel like that every single day for a whole semester.
Is it possible to tell if someone has social anxiety issues even through emails or texts?
No.
How was your experience with social anxiety?
Talking to anyone new..is horrifying. With people you used to know and been in contact with, its also frightening. However, it is easier to talk to people who’ve known you for your whole life (or at least a big chunk). Classroom settings were the worst for me. Its important to know what sets it off the most.Social Anxiety really prevented me from making wonderful connections. It stripped me of my personality in a sense too (with the help of depression). Being with good friends can remind you of yourself, how you differ and relate to others comfortably. Without making, or continuing, those relations, it will get harder. It gets lonely; and out of desparation and bravery, I forced myself to become very direct. Maybe a little too direct..I forgot how to genuinely smile at one point, also because I was numb to depression. I wanted to let people know that I was very interested in hearing them out, but my body language conveyed something else. Thoughts of others, “not wanting” to be involved with me was challenging. So much that I was constantly questioning all of my friendships. You really learn what is a true friend through the experience, at least to me.Everyone told me to fake a smile, but that never felt right. But I knew I loved making people smile. So began to smile for people to see them smile and it worked. Smiling is easier now, talking to people became easier too.