My depressed friend is making me depressed. I dont know what to do. I want to help her but at what expense?
It would help to know how you had put your own feelings, emotions and needs on the back burner for your friend's sake. Some examples would help.It is true that a depressed person can bring other people down, but that doesn't mean you cannot express your own feelings, emotions and needs. Did she say she didn't care if you need anything and want you to just focus on her?Sometimes, people who haven't had depression are convinced they know what the depressed patient is going through, what the solution is and try to offer their "help" and "suggestions". When those offers are turned down, they feel unappreciated or hurt. But what really happened is that your help is not really helping. Leave the treatment to the professionals unless you're a doctor yourself. Very often, depressed patients just want someone to listen without judgment.Does listening deplete you emotionally as well? Or does she want more than just being listened to?By all means, if it feels too much to you, stop seeing/helping her. Self-preservation is important. It's just that from your question, you sound like you're resenting her for not getting better despite your effort. I just want to offer another angle why she's not getting better. It's not because she's unappreciative. It could be for other reasons such as not having the proper medical help and you cannot expect a sick patient to get better just because you offer your moral support. Major depression is a real illness, not just a thought or lack of will power. And there is no need to tip-toe or act differently around her. Just be your normal self. Being treated like a normal person probably helps her feel better than being patronized or constantly pestered to feel better.
If getting a tattoo makes you feel more like yourself, is that a good reason for getting one?
Thanks for the A2A. I think the best reason to get a tattoo is because you want a tattoo. You might want a tattoo because it helps remind you of something, or because it makes you feel more like yourself, or because a myriad other reasons. Each person has their own. But the point is, you want this tattoo for yourself. That’s reason enough, and the best reason I can think of.A lot of people, unfortunately, get tattoos to stick it to society, or annoy their parents, or please their significant other. The only problem with that is that society, your parents, or your significant other won’t have to carry the ink around for the rest of their lives. You’ll be stuck with it, and in my opinion these are the reasons that get you on a fast-track route to Regretsville.The flip side of the above is -if you get a tattoo for your own reasons, society, your parents, your other half etc can mind their own damn business about it (as long as it’s not, you know, offensive). The only person you’re answerable to is yourself and your own sense of what is right for you.So, the short answer to your question, I suppose, is -it’s a good reason if it’s a good reason for you :)I hope this helps. Best of luck :)
What symbols or tattoo did people with depression or other mental disorders use to help them not give up?
I had my childhood taken away from me by several things, from losing my father, to being assigned an asshole as a new one, to being abused, to raising my own sister, to having to protect that same sister from her own father, to feeling like a failure to my mother. That’s not the story. The story is, I found MMA, Karate and Brazilian Jiu-Jistsu - for the first time ever I felt strong. I felt like I belonged somewhere without even trying. I noticed that it wasn’t only the sport, I was making myself stronger. I was writing, drawing, merging myself into a world of poetry, music and art. I learned how to be strong, smarter and alone. The latter being the most important.I was depressed before and during this time. I tried to kill myself and I was stealing pain killers, hoarding them so that I could finally kill myself. I won a silver medal at a BJJ championship, and it changed me. It was just a medal, yes, but I felt strong. I felt in control. I took that dicipline and worked it into the rest of my life. I started growing. I got happier. I made it through all the hell I was given. I won’t give too much details. Life is bad for all of us. Some of us have it worse. I’m sure many of you out there have it much worse.I got my second tattoo when I was 18. I thought long and hard about it, but ended up picking a simple design that meant a lot to me. I love tigers, they’re strong, beautiful and fierce. They are just amazing. It was also related to the logo of my Karate club’s association. I fell in love, and still love it today. It’s there to remind me that I can be strong too, I can be fierce. I can be calm, and I can survive even though I feel hunted. I haven’t had a regret.I would’ve gotten a wolf on the other side to create simitry, but I decided not to later, because the tiger is fierce and strong alone, just like I should be. If I feel strained, afraid, or useless, I remind myself, I can be strong.So can you.
Do people get judged with Tattoos and Piercings?
I love all of your answers!!! It's going to help me out alot!!! Because I need to know what people think these days, and I need to prove my point that just because you have tattoos and piercings and dyed hair doesn't mean your a drug addict, that your a murderer, that your a bad person, or your going to commit suicide. I think it shouldn't matter what people look like. It's how they express themselves and show that everyones different. Not everyone is the same. I wish I could change everything so that people get accepted more. You might look at someone with alot of tattoos, sleeves, chest, back they could be covered in tattoos and they could be the sweetest nicest caring person than the people who judge them. I think tattoos and piercings are beautiful. And the define and outline who they are... If we didn't get tattooed and pierced we'd all be the same.
Why do i feel anxious after getting my tattoo?
just stop thinking about it (not easy right) but you know what doing so will cause you--anxiety. Could it be that this anxiety comes from a fear that someone will ridicule you for doing this to yourself (i.e. parents). When these negative thoughts pop up, just ignore them and think positively about your tattoo otherwise, you will need to go in for cognitive therapy--helps do the above--cancel the negative thoughts with positive ones..."people will see what my ideals are based on my tattoo" and go from there. Take care.
Should we get rid of all flash tattoos?
I'm not a fan of flash either. I just couldn't imagine walking into a studio and picking something off the wall. It's too impersonal and unimaginative for me. But that's just me. There are plenty of people in this world who are 'against' tattoos in general and would take away people's right to be tattooed at all if they could. I hate those judgemental pricks. And if I applied this judgement to people getting flash, I'd be just as bad. At the end of the day - everybody is a winner. The flash artist can continue to make money by selling their drawings. The tattoo artist continues to make easy money. The person who gets the tattoo walks away happy. Just because they're of a different opinion to me doesn't make them in the wrong. Anybody who is of legal age, saves up the money and can sit through the pain deserves a tattoo. But I just think that most of us wouldn't consider someone who just had a couple of bits of flash that they thought about that day to be a real member of the 'tattoo culture' as it were. They're just a different type of person, and they often (perhaps not always) don't have a real appreciation of tattooing as an artform like most of us do. But it doesn't matter. They're not hurting anyone. So let them get on with it.
HELP! Can i sue a tattoo artist for a horrible job?
I have been REALLY depressed about my new coverup tattoo. My unlicensed 'self employed tattoo artist' did a cover up tattoo for me he covered up a self done tattoo he has a facebook with his protfolio of people he has worked on and from my judgement all the tattoos he has done was pretty good. When i got a somewhat tribal looking sun to coverup my old tattoo it looked absolutely horrible the tattoo is not even and it looks like theres a big black blob of ink in the middle to cover it up its not even a good circle... all my friends say it looks like crap and so do i . I am 16 and my mother does not know but i am planning to tell her about my huge mistake soon so if i build a case against this graduated 18 year old can i sue for a removal of the tattoo I did not sign any papers but i can prove that he worked the ink on me from text messages and facebook chats ive been really depressed lately about this and i feel like he messed up my priceless skin