How do you live with a very lazy husband and a controlling mother-in-law?
Okay Lisa, First let us cover your part. You do some of the house work, okay? Not all of it. Please don’t be a housework martyr, overworking and constantly complaining. Instead, be loving and set a happy tone in your family.At a weekly family meeting (fun and kind, with dessert), set the chore schedule. Let the children, husband, mother-in-law all contribute to the functioning of the home. No one wants to be shut out, a burden, and unwanted, unneeded, let all play a part in the smooth functioning of the home.Don’t do for others what they can do for themselves. Don’t pick up dirty dishes, don’t pick up towels, don’t pick up laundry, don’t fold clothes, don’t set the table, and so on. Let others help. (That includes your darling husband.)Also, are you advancing yourself in your career? Just checkin. Cuz your being a vibrant, engaged person can do a lot for Mr. Do Nothing.Okay, now to husband. Does his mother live with you? She might be bringing him down. Depressing him. Making him feel bad. Laziness has an emotional component.Does he liven up when he is away from her and with productive, active people?If Mom lives with you and husband, please thoroughly explore other options for her living arrangements. Does this in a kind way! Please be diplomatic. You don’t want both her and your husband to freak out! Take your time, don’t rush it. Don’t make her feel rejected, most importantly.Next, laziness has some underlying feelings, and it can be three or four feelings that need to be resolved. It could be something that happened in the present, and tied to something that happened in his childhood. John Gray has some amazing books that are very accessible: “What You Feel, You Can Heal” is one.Can you spend some time with your husband, not suggesting, encouraging, but just hanging out? If he talks and tells you his concerns, give him advice. If you know of an activity that he would really like to do that is productive, challenge him to go for it (when the time and mood are right).
Why does my teacher give me so much work?
Some of them do—and I’m looking at you, math teachers! My math teaching colleagues often assigned about an hour of homework each evening. They thought that was necessary for students to master the concepts. The science teachers, especially advanced science, thought their kids needed an hour or so of homework. That’s two hours of nonnegotiable (it seems) homework. I tried not to give too much (I taught English), but sometimes we just didn’t manage to get everything done in class. And then you know what? The kids didn’t do MY homework—they did the math and science homework! High school students generally take 6 classes. If every teacher thinks his/her class requires an hour of homework an evening, that’s 6 hours of homework every night! When does a kid play sports? Take a role in the school play? Spend time with family? Read for fun? SLEEP? Even just a half hour of homework from those 6 subjects leads to 3 hours homework each evening, making sports, extracurriculars, family, and fun stuff difficult. Then there are those teachers who think breaks are for big projects. Nope. Breaks are, well, breaks.I’m not sure of the solution to this problem. I tried to help my students out by assigning less homework and allowing more in-class time to work. But many of my colleagues simply would not compromise. It’s going to take a big mind shift.
Is there any K-Pop idol that you hate, who is it and why?
I’ve never told anyone of this, because I’m scared of the judgement I’ll have to say.It’s not really a hatred, at all, I don’t hate him, that’s for sure. Possibly a…certain hostility?BTS’ Park Jimin.Okay, you might be thinking, why? He’s pretty, visually perfect, great at dancing, kind and caring, athletic, a good vocalist, has a nice voice, no flaws whatsoever–And that’s the problem I have. I hate perfect people. I hate the fact that everyone loves him, and he’s that one member with literally no haters out there. Growing up, I’ve always been compared to with others. My parents thought that by comparing me with my classmates, it would up my motivation. Instead, it drove me into depression. Sometimes I look at my classmates and sister and think that they’re so, so much better than me, and it hurts a lot. I hate perfect people.And guess what Jimin is? Flawlessly perfect. It infuriates me.Edit: I already know of his self-confidence issues. Please stop. I’m not here to be corrected. Is there a way to delete and disable comments?