Why are my parents always disappointed in me?
For every child this is a horrible situation to be in.I think the reason is simple.They have their own understanding of success / failure and you don’t live up to their vision - what they would like you to be like.The reason parents are disappointed in their children is always the same. Parents want the best for their children. They have this understanding of what ‘best’ is and what their children should do in order to have it.If the child tries to redefine success / failure parents will usually tell her/ him “You don’t know what real life is.”Most parents won’t wait until their children come up with their own definitions of success and happiness, accept them and then look at their lives to see whether or not they are anywhere close.Instead they will apply their own definitions (understanding) of success / failure and happiness and look for indications of those in their children’s lives.It’s easier than letting your child to mess with those concepts.Most people think they know precisely what success / failure and happiness are. Their parents, colleagues, friends, relatives and neighbors share with them these definitions and, if so, there is no need to dwell on that.Furthermore, parents want to know that they did a great job parenting their children. So they want to see the results. Probably what’s even more important for the majority of them is that others can also see the results. They want to be proud of their family and brag. And if the results are not what they’d expect they’re disappointed. It’s as simple as that.Parents who are self-aware and who ask thoughtful questions about their role as parents and their expectations will come to the conclusion that being disappointed in their children is entirely their problem. That it’s about expecting that everybody around you will have the same understanding of success as you do. That it’s about imposing your concepts and life philosophy on others. And thus they will want to work on themselves.
My parents always disappoint me?
make me mad like they really get on my nerves they never keep their word.........my dad never ever keeps his word with anything he's always telling me wat he's gonna do but never doing it this makes me sad cuz m mom does the same thing but not as often as he does..........they never do what they say they were going to do and sometimes im in tears because of this they always disappoint me.......like today I was suppose to be going to the beauty shop to get my hair done(thats what my mom told me earlier)but now she says she icant and i really wanted to look nice for v-day and on this friday cuz thats my b'day........i really was looking forward to do that and they always let me down.....how can i deal with this should i just never believe what they say because it seems like when i try to trust them they just let me down?????????
Why are my parents always disappointed in me?
In my elementary years, I was the star of my parents' lives. My brother was in high school and they hated him, always compared him to me. I was a perfect straight-A student, wrote really bad novels in my spare time, etc. etc. Now my brother is in college and I'm taking the crap. I make all A's except for one B in calculus (I am a freshman -- skipped up 3 math years to do this). I do one extracurricular which takes up most of my spare time. I do go out occasionally, but not nearly as much as the average teen or even my brother, who my parents seem to overlook now. On weekends and during breaks, I am expected to read calculus books outside of my textbook, write college essays, and study for the SAT. While this is not unreasonable, it is often taken to the extreme. They expect me to "think of academics as soon as I wake up, as soon as I get home from school, right before I go to sleep" and if I think of something else on accident, for example a friends' birthday, hell will commence. What they expect me to do isn't so bad, but I can never do it right. When I do a little, it's not enough. I've been yelled at more times than I can count in the past few weeks, while my brother goes out every night and doesn't come back until 2 am. I don't want to ***** about more details than I've already written, but how do I make them proud? I am so sick of living up to their expectations and constantly hearing "I'm so disappointed in you... how did you end up like this?". My dad told me he had a dream that he woke up at 8 am and went into my room and found me studying calculus, but instead I was sleeping. I can't see that as realistic. I'm trying not to be that stereotypical annoying teenager, and I know I'm failing, but I could use a little advice. I've tried talking to them. How do I do it right? Thanks, yahoo community.
My parents are always disappointed with me no matter what I do. I feel like running away. What should I do?
Hilet me start from why they are disappointed from you. There could be two possible reasons for that-They know you well and wants the best for you. They knew your capabilities and strengths and just wanted to make sure that you are not wasting the precious opportunities which you are fully capable of taking advantage but you aren't due to fear of hardwork you have to do for that. They don't want you to regret later. In this case you need to self evaluate and try to listen to your parent's advice because “PARENTS ARE NOT ALWAYS WRONG”. This has became a general attitude that our parents don't understand us but they do.The next possible reason could be your parent's expectations are wrong. They are comparing you to someone else. In this case you need to put extra efforts and make them understand that everybody has there different capabilities, interest, choices and strengths and everybody is just perfect the way they are. The same phrase goes here that “PARENTS ARE NOT ALWAYS RIGHT” . They too are human beings and guides you according to their experience.You have to make them understand that it is ok to have different experience and to be different from “sharmaji ka beta”.sometimes the adult ego make it difficult for them to understand this but you have to be patient with them and talk with them very politely and respectfully. Anger and eagerness can ruin everything.So you can put an end to this disappointment with some patience and choosing a middle way where both you and your parents need to change thinking about each other and lead a happy and cheerful life.Hope it helps and pardon for the poor English, I am not much comfortable with the language.
My parents are disappointed in me. What can I do to have them smile when they see me?
Wow! that was very through... It really all boils down to the very simple fact that the reason you don't go all out and get straight A's and become a miniature version of either your mother or father is a deep seated fear of failure.. no big deal .kids everywhere are the same way. All you can do is do your best,.and i do mean ,do your best.If you know you can do better on a test ,then do it... You will never be your dad, he knows this and so do you, but you can be anything you want to be. As you get older your dad will finally understand that you are who you are and you of course know he loves you very much, he just wants to give you every opportunity possible. He has so much that he want to share with you,but he will understand one day that different things make different people happy.Maybe you will be just as happy with PGand E as he is with what he does.. When he sees that you are following through with a project ,,from start to finish and doing well, he will be happy for you. Don't worry about how young you look right now, your appearances will change very soon, testosterone will start kicking in and all of you will change before you know it.. Put off going overseas for now, there is plenty of time later. Besides ,you will enjoy it much more when you are a few years older.. As for your sister, you have nothing to try to make up for. She ,like you are who you are and she is going to do with her life as she sees fit. she too is rebelling, she feels like she is always being "Pushed " into a lifestyle not of her own making.. Same with you. One day she will find her way ,just as you will find your footing.. Relax and just know that sometimes it really not all about ourselves. Your dad is entitled to his feelings and short of becoming a clone ,it is something he will deal with in his own way and time. Let him know you love him (and your mom) and that one day you will figure out what it is that you want to do..
Why do my parents seem disappointed in me?
I ve always been a good girl I think... My dad mostly seems afraid of the Internet. He s told us he is before. I m not sure he monitors my internet browsing, but even if so, it s all just innocent searches. It would be a different story if he saw my texts. (No sexting or nudes just a lot of swearing which i m trying to improve on) he would have called me out on it by now. Me and my close sister were ranting about our strict principal and his rules for the Internet. His kids have flip phones that are completely monitored and they can t have them in their rooms. We expected him to mock our principal like he normally does but he just said "thats not a bad idea" quietly. I thought he was joking but my heart jumped when he looked dead serious and slightly stressed. I m alone in my room with my laptop and phone a lot so I guess he d wonder what I do in there but he never really asks. It s starting to scare and worry me whenever he s on his laptop or talking to my mom in private. Like heart racing, hands sweating, face heating up scared. I m really confused and don t know what s going on or why he s so skeptical about the Internet. Can anyone help me out? I m scared he s going to want to start checking my phone or instal some kind of spy software on it. That feels invasive of my privacy. I know they re my parents, but there s no reason they shouldn t trust me.
How do you deal with being disappointed by your own parents?
I’ve had my fair share of disappointment.one thing that helped me was to really see that my parents were people. when you’re young (for most people, anyway) your parents are gods. they can do no wrong. they are these safe people. i think we build up an image around them. once, at a lecture at the jungian society, the speaker explained it like this:“the mother archetype, the part of us that needs this mother, is this big.” he spread his hands about two feet apart. “and the amount a real person (the idea of mother isn’t gender specified. the role of mother can also go to the father) can fill is this much.” he spread his hands a little less then a foot. “most of us,” he continued. “can find other people to supply this need, friends, teachers, relatives. well others will give it to themselves.” this can lead to narcassism personality disorder.anyway, my point is that eventually your parents will fall from grace, you will see that they are no different from you or from anyone else, that has screwed up. it will not make the pain and hurt go away but there times when you have to just except that you’re parents messed up and that it will have consequence. in my experience this has been the most unpleasant part of growing up.
Why is my mom always disappointed in me?
Not just like...disappointed...its more like she favors my 16-almost-17-in-4-months-sister more than me. I usually get straight A's, and this semester we just moved to USA from Asia, and being 2 weeks late into school, she still expects me to get perfect grades. She doesn't help me in studying; instead she yells at me to. I got a B this semester, and she thinks that I'm doing this on purpose to get attention. My sister on the other hand, a junior when im just a freshman, got 3 B's and my mom was totally fine with it, saying that my sister had more pressure than I do. My mom laughs and has fun with my sister, and I do a ton of chores. When I try to say my sister hasn't done anything, my mom gets pissed off and tells me I'm "useless", "ugly", a "pain in the ***". I am just so tired of being so put down all the time. I don't know what my question is, really. I am just really, really, REALLY, tired of people continuously saying i'm dumb because I know that already. I know Im nothing special but my mom just keeps SAYING it. She just told me not to 'act' so timid and scared of her but the thing is, she keeps YELLING. SCREAMING. and when i tell her to lower her voice she screams even LOUDER and says that THIS is yelling, not my previous tone of voice. And dont freaking tell me to 'talk' to her. My mom and I...we're not able to talk. Just tell me how to deal with this, I guess. thanks.
Why is my mom always disappointed in me?
Don’t let your mother’s apparent disappointment in you keep you from enjoying your life. Your mom’s display of disappointment could have absolutely nothing to do with you! She could be disappointed in her own life.Or she could just not be in a point in her own life where she appreciates the “Stage of Life” that you are in. Yes! You go through stages in your development in life and so does your mother and father too! Brush it off and do your very best at all you do. That is all you can do! Ask yourself this question while you are doing everything you do - “Am I doing my very best?”. Yes!All throughout you life, your very best is expected of you if you are expected to have a decent life! Think about that. Half way measures will NOT provide you a halfway decent life. NOPE! You must do your very best in all you do! Do you give your best efforts in all you do?If you do, pay no attention to her disappointment, she is obviously not giving you her very best as she should. She is not giving you her very best if she is not addressing why she is disappointment, is she? If she is and you haven’t listened - that is on you. Somewhere in your home life, people are not doing their very best. It could be both of you. Start by making sure you are doing your very best in all you do. Make sure you are doing your very best in school work and every thing you do - even if it is sweeping the floor, keeping your room clean or sweeping the floor! Put your total best effort into everything you do! It will always show!