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Read This Paragraph And Tell Me If I Can Do Anything To Improve It

Please read my descriptive paragraph and tell me how to improve! (short!)?

To improve, you could be less repetitive, and use a brighter tone in your writing. Also, usually in a story the tense is past, so unless it's like a tour of the room instead of a short story or a narrative, you should change your tense. Otherwise it is quite good!

Here is my take on it:

On my bed sat my favorite doll, a lovely, adorable doll that I had had since I was a child, a doll that brought back the pleasant memories of my younger years. She laid between the corners of the wall, dressed in pink. There, on her head, was fashioned a lovely bonnet, the white lace faded from years of cuddles and cold nights. It concealed much of her blonde hair, except for a few small tufts peeking out of the soft fabric. She had beautiful eyes, blue like the cloudless, summer sky that I often saw when we went out for tea. They sparkled as if to say hello, as if they were large dewdrops, reflecting the warm sunlight and clear skies. She wore a smile as big as the moon, her red lips like rosebuds peeping out of the melting snow, her face signifying the coming of spring after a white winter. Her bubble-gum colored dress hung loosely over her white skin, it's soft fabric sending a warm feeling through my body whenever I hugged her. One of the many small bows that were carefully sown on by mama covered her chin, laying focus on her soft face and red cheeks, which gave her an innocent, childish look. Too-short pants covered her pretty legs, pink like the cotton candy that one would buy at the fair on a lovely autumn day. Her scent- a mixture of baby powder and lavender cream- reminded me of when I used to play House in the kitchen, and mama would tell me to put on lotion, since it was a time when autumn became winter, and she was worried that I might get dry skin. Her pure presence brought a smile to my face, for she resembled the autumn, winter, spring, and summer of my childhood.

This is my take on it (even though it's not as elaborate as I would like it), Hope this helped! :)

Please tell me how to improve this paragraph! (short!)?

I would consider myself very good at writing, so first, you need to keep in mind that you need to write from a third-person point of view! No "I" "you" and no advice either!
A good chunk paragraph looks like this:
Topic Sentence
Set-up
Concrete Detail (parenthetical citation)
Commentary
Commentary
Set-up
Concrete Detail (parenthetical citation)
Commentary
Commentary
Concluding Sentence

For your topic sentence, do not state what is going to be in the paragraph, although it does need to revolve around your thesis.
Your set-ups should be leading into your quotation in the same sentence.
For example, in a literary analysis I wrote about Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet: "Juliet's immaturity is a little different than Romeo's; Juliet wants to be like a modern woman of society and play hard to get, but she is easily won by Romeo, "Then have my lips the sin that they have took" (1.5.119)."
Next, parenthetical citation is done like I have above. But since I was writing my essay on a script, the parenthetical citation was done by act.scene.line, but for a book, you will put the authors last name followed by page number with no punctuation in between. For example: (Smith 223).
Also, when you do parenthetical citation, you will not put the ending punctuation from the quote. You have to put it at the end of the citation. You can see how I put the period from the quote above in my first example. But if you continue your sentence after the quote, the citation will come at the end of the sentence, not next to the quote, and as well you will not put the ending punctuation from the quote until the end of the citation.
Your commentaries are good so far, but you really need to go more in depth with them! Pick out words from your quote and see what they really mean. You need to go deeper. A trick I use while writing an essay is not to think when I write my commentaries. I just type and type and usually I am satisfied with my result. You need to remember that you can make your opinion whatever you want it to be. An essay is never wrong. Infer things from your concrete details that you do not believe anyone else would pick up if they had not read your essay.
Good luck! Writing for me is so much fun! I hope you enoy it as much as I do!

Can anyone make two paragraphs about anything ?

New York City is a fun place to visit. There are many different things to do and many famous landmarks to see. For example, You can see the Statue of Liberty, a gift from the French given many years ago. You can also walk around in the very colorful and vibrant atmosphere of Times Square and see many people. With plenty of things to see, visit and marvel at, New York City is definitely a great place to vacation.

Vacationing is a hobby that many people enjoy. All around the world, there are many different places to see and visit. There is an ideal vacation spot for everyone! Vacationing also helps get many people's minds off of their hectic lives back home. When can we plan our next vacation, mom?

What are some ways to improve critical reading and reading comprehension skills?

First of all, it's impossible to remember all of the details, especially in a highly technical book/article. Trust me, I've tried. That being said, there are ways to improve your recall. I found these techniques effective as a history major and during law school. (Both endeavors require a high degree of reading comprehension and recall.)Underline or highlight - you can do this on paper or electronically. I find it easier to recall an obscure detail about a woman's slip-and-fall on page 28 if I underline the relevant passage. Of course, underlining and highlighting aren't enough. This technique, however, allows you to find a particular tidbit later in time. Not all of us have photographic memory, sadly.Pinpoint themes - during my studies, I would always scribble a few thematic on the margin as I was reading. For example, if I was reading about antebellum South, I would write "impact of slavery" on the margin whenever I saw a connection. There are usually a few overarching themes in any reading. If you can isolate and identify the themes, you are leagues beyond the average reader. This skill takes practice, so don't worry if you don't do it well at first.Think about what you're reading - reading can be a passive or an active activity. Reading passively means that you're just letting information stream by. Active reading is when you stop at different points and think - what does all of this mean? This is different than reading slowly --  absorbing individual words is useless unless you put them in a grander context. (This is a prerequisite for the suggestion #2.)There are probably scores of other suggestions out there, but simple steps are a good place to start.

How do I improve my reading comprehension for the GRE in one month?

I'm guessing you've already taken your exam by now, but this is a good question, so I'll answer it in case anyone else is curious. :) This is a hard question to answer. For one, when you just begin, reading comprehension may seem overwhelming—difficult passages on strange and foreign topics. Don't be discouraged! Success is in your reach. But the path to GRE success is not short and not easy; it requires work, determination, and dedication. To help you on your journey to GRE Reading Comprehension domination, I am giving you some resources that will help you to succeed. Each one tackles a different aspect of reading comprehension, and if you want to read actively and understand the passage in front of you, dive into these resources and commit them to memory. Read them multiple times and know them like you know the day of your birth.Introduction to Reading Comprehension (Strategies and Pacing):GRE Reading ComprehensionHow to approach questions: GRE Reading ComprehensionExample of how a passage is outlined:GRE Reading Comprehension Passage OutlinesIdentifying Patterns in Passages:GRE Reading Comprehension Passage PatternsPacing strategies:GRE Pacing on Reading Comprehension (RC)In addition to reading these resources, you should be reading all the time to prepare for the GRE. Read. Read. Read. This will help you to learn new words, see different passage structures, and become familiar with forms and styles employed by authors.But don't just read anything. You need to read higher level passages. I recommend reading the following news sources regularly. And try to read articles on topics you normally would not choose to read. This will help you to feel comfortable with topics you normally don't encounter. 1. The New York Times (The New York Times)2. The Wall Street Journal (The Wall Street Journal)3. BBC (INDEX )4. The Economist (World News, Politics, Economics, Business & Finance)5. The MIT Technology Review (MIT Technology Review)I hope that you find this helpful!

How can I improve my English reading speed?

In reading, these are importantAnalysisRetentionUnderstandingSpeedAnd Understanding and Speed depends on These factorsEnglish Grammar and UsageWord PowerReading HabitInterestKnowledge of different areasLogical and Analytical ThinkingTo improve your understanding and speed, these can help you:Develop habit of reading Newspapers, Magazines, Novels,Read different subjects: Science, Economics, Philosophy, Psychology, Economics, Political, Technology, Literature , Poetry, StoriesImprove your Word Power and correct UsageLearn about Different Styles of writingTo Improve SpeedImprove your concentrationImprove Speed of Mind: so that you can speedily absorb and analyse information, dataTo improve speed of brain you should Play Brain Games: You can download apps like Brain Gym and many other.Develop Logical and Analytical thinking: Solve Logical, Analytical and Critical Thinking problemsEye span: You can find many Apps to improve your Eye span and can purely improve your speed of readingTo perform better in exams:Daily solve at least one ParagraphStart from simple, then Intermediate and then go to higher levelLearn and Practise of Skimming and ScanningLearn Precis, Central Idea of Paragraph, Theme and Tone, Title settingSolve paragraphs of different genre.Continuity is Key:With continuity and practice, you can have compounded benefits of your efforts. So it, definitely, help you to perform better and best results.Writing and Discussion:Develop habit of writing at least one page. If you can write better, you can read faster.Discussion on any topic will improve your analytical thinking and Argumentation and finally your understanding.Speak:If you can speak Correct and Standard English you can Read and Write Better.Knowledge:With in-depth knowledge you can increase your comfort level. You can read, write and speak with ease.This is just a outline. If you are interested to learn all these things Practically and want to apply. Feel free to contact me on Quora.

How to improve English spelling?

I teach grade 7 oral English, and my students always want to know how to spell their vocabulary words. They MEMORIZE the spelling for their words.
You can also try grouping words in various ways. For instance, January, February (both end in uary) and look for patterns like that.
Try making lists like:
peach
reach
teach
each
beach

Practice learning words you will find useful for your daily life. Don't begin to learn words that you will never use. You are more likely to remember the word if it is one you find useful.

After you have successfully spelled the word, try writing it in a good sentence. For example, January. J-a-n-u-a-r-y. January is the first month of the year.

You can label things in your house/apartment with English labels, such as cupboard, shelf, window, etc.

Buy two good dictionaries -- one should be good English dictionary, such as Oxford, and the other should be an English-to-your-native-language dictionary.

Your spelling can also be improved by reading. Yahoo Answers is riddled with spelling errors, so be careful what you choose to read! You can read UK or North American literature. There is a lot available on the net, or you can purchase it from a bookstore. If your English reading skills are low, try reading some children's books. There are some very cute, funny, and heartwarming books that will help you with your vocabulary and spelling.

Set a goal. Try to learn 10 to 12 new words per week. If you try to learn any more, you will not retain them. Not only should you know how to spell the words, but you should know the definitions. Keep a notebook or journal of your words and definitions. Keep track of your progress.

I would also suggest 2-4 hour of tutoring per week with a native-English speaker. I would spend 2-3 hours per week on speaking, and about 1-2 hours per week on writing.

Good luck! Happy learning!

How can I improve reading comprehension?

hmmmm...It's hard to say what is going on here. Are you paying attention to class when the teacher is lecturing? Are you reading you're textbook at your "prime time?" Are you concentrating on reading? Do you have a lot of background noises or do you turn on music other than classical when you read? Do you read where it is bright?

If you answered no to any one of the above, then you need to fix that. Your "prime time" is when you feel that you work most efficiently in the day. For example, my "prime time" is in the afternoon around 4. I do all my homework then, and finish it really quickly, whereas I would have a hard time doing it in the morning.

If you answered no to ALL of the questions above, then here are two secrets to all reading comprehension, spelling, vocab, and homework in general. Drumroll please. The secrets are...flash cards and your own copy of the textbook. You can get most textbooks cheap on an online auction site, and flash cards can be found in any old stationary store.

HOW TO USE THESE SECRETS
if you use flash cards, which is by far the very best way to study, get a stack of these cards and write down key vocab words and points that you think are important on the flash cards, spelling them right. These key points can often be found on textbooks and online book summaries. After you wrote all these down, you have committed much more to your memory already by WRITING. Then, take these flashcards, and go say it in front of a mirror. This commits more by SPEAKING. Then, take these cards and TEACH it to your parents, friends, or family. this completes the final step of embedding something in your memory. This write, speak, teach method is confirmed by psychologists. A few days before the exam/quiz, take these cards around you wherever you go. Read em in passing period. Read em in a line. Read em EVERYWHERE

If you use the textbook, just highlight the key points and REREAD.

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