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Should I Be Friends With Someone Who Used Me

Can you be just friends with someone you like?

When we first met she was already into this other guy. I didnt start liking her until a month or two after knowing her. We've been growing closer over the last year and she's now dating the guy she likes. I don't want to ruin it for her by getting involved, she seems kinda happy. I dont want to ruin what we have by telling her how I feel. I genuinely care about her. I know that she doesnt "owe" me anything for our friendship. I would like to remain friends with her with hopes of it turning into something more but im also fine with being just friends in order to keep her in my life. Im cool with the idea of her dating other people but seeing and hearing about it is kinda painful.

Email from someone who says we used to be friends?

I got an email from someone who says we used to talk online between 2007-2010 but I have no idea who this person is.

The email sender acted like we were old friends, knew my fashion style, type of music I listened too from that period. I thought it might have been someone I used to talk but the sender told me he was not him.

He also knew the job I has as a teenager, what I was going to study in college. What does this mean?

Should I be friends with someone who does drugs?

No!

1) If you are with the person and they are carrying drugs and get caught, you will be implicated (guilt by association). You may not ultimately get into trouble, but until the police/parent/authority knows you are innocent, you won't have a pleasant time!

2) People on drugs can do stupid or dangerous things, which might get you in trouble or seriously hurt.

3) They have to get their drugs from a dealer, and that "someone" could be a dangerous person with dangerous friends. You will be known to those bad people through your friend, and could cause you harm if they have disputes or other issues. There was a story on the news just the other day about two guys who murdered a guy's sister to get back at him for not paying for the drugs they'd sold him.

4) Your friend most likely has other friends he/she hangs out with to do drugs. People who do drugs can often be involved in crime, get bad grades, don't perform as well in sports or their jobs, can have bad relations with their parents, community, etc. You'll get a reputation, even if you don't do drugs.

5) It's all too easy to try drugs when your friend is doing them through peer pressure, curiosity, or wanting to share the same experience. Bad news!

6) There is a culture involving drug use that you won't be part of, so you (hopefully) won't have that in common with your friend. It involves breaking the law, harming your body, lying to friends and family, a kind of disrespect for themselves, society, family, etc. and spending money on the stuff that could be better spent, Thus, it probably wouldn't develop into a deep and long-lasting friendship.

7) Besides all the above, do you really want to be friends with someone who, indirectly, is supporting crime, murder, poverty, slavery and all the other horrific things the Mexican drug cartels (for example) are doing to innocent people?

If you otherwise like this person, tell them you will look forward to being their friend when they get off drugs, and will happily give them the emotional and friendship support to stay clean. Until then, stay well away!

Can you really Be friends with someone you are in love with?

Assuming you mean "just friends" as opposed to being both friends and lovers. In that case, nope...it never works. You will always be wanting more and will have a hard time when he is dating someone else and telling you all about it. Trust me.

If you meant being both friends AND in love, then yes...I think it's essential.

How can I become friends again with someone I used to be really close with?

I usually just accept the fact that my path probably will not cross them again, and move on. The funny thing is, once I set my thought like that, I have higher probability to meet them again in the future in different circumstances, which probably will be a better situation for you to form new bonds with them. I don’t think forced relationship will work. If you feel you have to force yourself or them to mend the relationship when things felt awkward, I think it’s the sign that it’s not the time. It’s better to just go with the flow if we’re talking about relationship. I mean, you do need to work on your relationship, but if the timing is not right, almost nothing can make it right. Time will surely show you the way. Maybe you will meet them at a new workplace, where you have to be a team? Maybe you meet your other friends and turns out they also bring these old friends of yours along? Many scenario could happens. But first, you have to be able to let it go, for the sake of your own sanity and wellness. To speak the truth, you most probably don’t miss them. You miss the old times and memories of them. They probably have changed right now, and you can be disappointed if you’re clinging and expecting the good ol’ memories while forming relationship with who they are right now. So, let it go… let it go… :)

How can I deal with friends that use me?

This may not be entirely relevant to your situation but I wanted to mention a quote from John Green’s novel The faults in our stars which is “The truth is everyone in this world is going to hurt you. You just need to find the ones worth suffering for.”Now coming back to your question it really depends on, in what way are your friends using you. What I mean is if a friend of yours is say not financially accomplished and he uses you to get him food, drives etc but is a loyal friend and has genuine feelings towards you and you dont have an issue spending a bit extra of ur time or resources on him, then I guess its fine to just avoid the using thing.But if you do have a problem with him and you think he really is a good friend then talk to him about it or just stop being used by him.

How do you know if someone is really your friend?

I'd have to say that you'll know that a person is a true friend when they act genuinely interested in you & want to hang out/do things with you. Sure, they might ask you to help them with their math, but I think a true friend will also be willing to help you out with things that they are able to help w/. A true friend won't act differently around you when they're around other people. A true friend won't use you on the one hand & then lose you on the next. I think someone that's really your friend will also iniate phone calls & text messages. It won't be a one-way street, aka, just YOU initiating the phone calls/texts. A good friend, I think, will also feel the need to prove themselves as such to a certain extent as well. In other words, they will be willing to put energy into the friendship; they won't leave all the work up to you.

As for you text message question, I'd say that it's not a good thing to think too heavily on whether a person responds back or not. If it's just an occasional thing, then definitely don't worry. They are more than likely busy, or just accidentally forgot. However, if you text them on a somewhat regular basis but never get a response, then yes, I'd say they are more than likely ignoring you. If such is the case, I wouldn't continue texting them. They aren't worth your time in the least.

Boyfriend still friends with someone he used to have sex with, feeling uncomfortable?!?

So my boyfriend and I have been dating for about 7 months now. He has a really good friend that he used to hook up with. Now I think shes a great person and nice and a great friend and everything but I cant help but feel uncomfortable with their relationship. He's a sweetheart and has a big heart and loves helping people and I trust him completely. However, I'm not comfortable with him always texting her and calling her, especially when I'm with him. Most of the time it's her calling him, but still. Now she has a boyfriend and all, but I still believe she still has feelings for him. I see how she looks at him and it just bothers me. He will hang out with her with her and her boyfriend, but I still want to be there even if theres other people. Is that crazy or too controlling? He doesn't really have any other good friends right now, and I understand that shes been through a lot of the same things that he has and they can relate. This relationship just scares me and really bothers me. I know I can trust him, but I know if he was in my position, he would not put up with this ****. Also he'll text and talk to her while hes with me, and a couple times I've called him and hes said "hold on I'm talking to the other girl" and would call me back. Idk I want them to be friends and I don't want to seem mean or controlling, but it really bothers me and I can't help it. Any advice? Btw I've talked to him a little about it but he just says come on shes my only friend and stuff like that.

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