Should I cut off all communication with a fling from the past that turned creepy?
I have been in a relationship for 4 months and I am happy. I had a short fling with a guy months before I got in this relationship. This fling ended quickly because he turned very possessive and creepy pretty quickly just after a month of dating which raised red flags and scared me off. I haven't spoken to him since and I have obviously moved on and met someone great. I haven't thought about him in a while until he started liking every little thing I post on facebook. I want to unfriend him since he creeps me out and I don't want him to try to interfere with what I have now. I am just afraid if I do unfriend him, he might fly off the handle about it (this is how he reaacted when I told him I did not want to see him anymore and that he was taking things way too fast and serious). He knows I am in a relationship now, and that is when he started liking everything I post on facebook. Should I unfriend him and cut off all other communication, or should I leave it alone and hope he stops showing his presence on purpose to get my attention like he has been doing? We are definitely not friends, and haven't physically seen or spoken to each other directly for 9 months.
Am I wrong to cut off all communication with my mom?
If you can not tell her how you feel in a phone conversation, write them a letter. Send it through snail mail, the old fashioned way and hand written. Express all your feelings to them that way. Do not call them in the meantime, and leave it their hands after that to respond or not. You at least need to lay these feelings on the table and let them ponder some things, instead of cornering them in a phone conversation requiring immediate responses. I believe your feelings are valid, based on the points you have given, and perhaps they just do not realize how you truly feel. As for cutting ties with them, I would not jump to that just yet, see how your letter does, and then take it from there. All the best
I've cut off communication with everyone?
Yes. You need to worry your mom. That's what parents do - they worry because that's their job. She does not want you to be unhappy but she can't help you if she doesn't know that you need more help than what you are getting. If you aren't on a medication for the depression you need to be which means that you need to see a psychiatrist who can prescribe meds. But know this - your depression won't last forever. The first year following the death of a spouse or parent is the hardest but eventually you will heal. It does get better - really. What you are going through is normal but you need to help yourself too and shutting out your friends isn't going to help you. So unblock them and leave that line of communication open. And try to make an effort to do something active with them - don't you think that's what your Dad would want you to do? If you can't talk to your Mum and tell her what is going on with you then talk to a school counselor and let the counselor talk with your mother.
I'm 50 and I want to stop all communication with my mother. I can't take any more of her negative, unkind comments about me. Am I right to do this?
ignore the responses below and watch the summed up argument.People who negatively affect you have no reason to be aroundAttachment to a parasite is only the humans fault in anyone’s caseEvery person in your life needs to deserve you by treating you with respect, and kindness. If this isn’t the case, they can’t be surprised when you leave them.If your mother wants you back after you leave her, let her be a positive influence.You wouldn't keep a friend that talks smack about you all day, why would you keep a mother?Sure, we all have an attachment to our family, but this is only AFTER they are NOT abusive, unkind and otherwise. Otherwise we only harm ourselves with them.Leave her, and if she wants you back, make it clear that you didn’t feel respected whilst talking with her, and that you are not interested in relationships where one does not value the other with their actions.(I had a mother that would routinely be nasty. I left one day, and she begged me to come back. I finally did, but nothing changed - she was just as nasty to me even after. I left her for good to live with other family, realizing that if she wants me back so bad she has to value me with kindness, respect, and appropriate treatment. She can’t yell at me, or call me bad things and expect me to stay.)Look at this logically a relationship is nothing more than two people valuing each other. If it HURTS you, be selfish and walk away.
Has anyone cut of communication with their family?
I'm 34, and I cut off communication with my family when I was 18. I won't pretend that I don't feel a loss at times, but in the grand scheme of things, they were emotionally abusive and I did what was best for me. Since then, I've met a few people who have filled that void in my life and are more of a family to me than I ever knew. After all, friends are there by choice, not by obligation. I don't regret the time I've spent apart from my family, but I have to say that if they ever wanted to contact me, I would be happy to hear from them. If you choose to move on, do so without a grudge. They only become a burden in your life if you let them.
Communication in my family sucks?
I just got up from seeing my mom in the pool and learned that my sister was in town yesterday. I have told my mom several times to let me know when my sister is in town because I don't hear otherwise and it is important to me to see her. I am learning that it isnt important to them that we see each other, because every bloody time my sister is in town I don't hear about it. I have told both my sister and my mom how this feels and it hasnt made a dent in either of their behavior. They have gone out for Thanksgiving and not told me about the plans. When confronted about it my mom just shrugs it off or tries to change the subject. When my sister isn't coming in - we don't do holidays whatsoever. My mom makes plans with her friends and my brother and I aren't even considered. My mom expects us to call her all the time, and complains when we don't, but not directly - I hear about my siblings and they hear about me. Triangular communication at its best. I feel like saying - mom - you have 3 kids not just one. I also want to find out why my sister never contacts me. It has never been a balanced relationship since day one. There are 7 years difference between us, and I think she always thought of me as her little sister that was a bother to her. I have to let this go -but it hurts alot that I dont have a relationship with my sister - I have emailed her about this and didn't get a response. How do I let go and move on?
My partner cut off all means of communication and vanished after a fight...?
I just want answers. We got into a nasty fight via text on Oct 1st after he accused me of being a stalker because I asked who his FB friend was. I unloaded on him and called him names...told him I hated him...and wished I never met him. He then proceeded to block my number and he blocked me on every website imaginable. No goodbye or anything. Just flat out silence. I know he's gone for good but...why did he just vanish? We were together 4yrs. This was the first fight we really had...
How do you cut all communication with your family without feeling guilty?
You’ll feel guilty at first, due to your family teaching you to do so, for not giving them the money they think they deserve, despite the financial problems it causes you and your insistance that you can’t do so. This is perfectly natural, considering how your family has abused you over the years. That being said, however, your family has repeatedly disrespected your boundaries for years as you’ve admitted, telling you through their words and actions that it’s fine for them to take advantage of you but you can’t stand up for yourself. I feel bad about saying this, as no parent or siblings should treat their child or sibling in such an awful way, however, there are some parents who don’t deserve the biological children given to them. Of course your mother would teach your brother and sister how to treat you by her example, sadly enough. Sometimes an individual’s biological family is so terrible that the person suffering from abuse, must find her own family in those she knows and trusts. I know to cut your family out of your life is very hard, however, I can assure you that you are making the right decision.
Will cutting all ties with my mother-in-law make her hate me more or less?
My newest book THE PRINCESS AND THE QUEEN explains more about this confusing relationship which affect more than the two women. We have the man in the middle and grandchildren to consider. I will briefly state some findings I had after 20 years of research of discussions and surveys with countless women. I began it as a daughter-in-law and finished it as a mother-in-law. Both women harbor insecurities and jealousy. The mother has given birth and nurtured her son. She is the one he has trusted his entire life up until he marries. He still loves his mother but of course his wife comes first. This can be difficult for the daughter-in-law who wants this woman to disappear. It is best when both women appreciate the benefit of each other and the place each has in his heart. One gave him roots and the other gives him wings to fly. Both are needed. Children lose when the relationship is strained. They know if mom or grandma don’t like each other. The man in the middle is hurt because he will never stop loving his mother even if he stops seeing her. I saw many men go back in contact years later and many daughters-in-law anxious to make amends especially as they watched their own sons grow into adulthood. It is a life cycle. Wife is number one but there is room in the man’s heart for his mother. Dil feel threatened by the Mil because she has such meaning in the husband’s heart. Mil’s are threatened because they don’t want to lose their sons or their grandchildren. There is nothing but gain when the women learn to respect each other and get along. That is not asking for much. We really don’t want the responsibility of being accused of making our husbands decisions and causing him grief his entire life due to our misunderstanding about mil’s and dil’s. Life is short and we all try to be everything in someone else’s eyes. We can’t be that. You are the mother of your children or will be. You can’t be the father or the mother-in-law. Your role is special and important as is the mother’s and father’s role. Share love and life and enjoy the benefits of a woman who will love your children and babysit and support you. She can enjoy the benefits of a daughter-in-law’s support and love and also the beautiful blessings of grandchildren. Don’t deny each other of the wonder of living a blessed life in peace. Each of us has gifts to offer we perhaps didn’t know we had. Good Luck and God Bless