Should i go to my ex mother in laws funeral?
My self and my wife are divorced. Her mother died and as I have known her for 30 years I feel I should go. My Girlfriend who i live with thinks its strange that i should want to. She says I cant move on. My mother is going and so are my grown up children. What should I do.? There was no bad feeling in our break up. We remain friends
Should I go to my ex mother-in-laws funeral?
My mother in law of 18 years died 2 days ago. I knew her 28 years. My ex-husband has remarried and the new wife of 5 years was close to my mother in law as well, but of course, did not know her as long as me and has no grandkids by her. My son is a college student in another state and his grandma loved him so much. She bought him his early graduation present (a car) just in case she died from her upcoming surgery, which she did. My son has perfect attendence at his school and his dad and I have both given him our blessing not to come home for the funeral if he is okay with that. I have never met this new wife and am hesitant to attend the funeral. It will be very hurtful to me to be a bystander at the funeral while this new woman is up and center with a family that I was a member of for 18 years. My question is...should i suck it up and go to the funeral as my son's representative and pay my respects and be hurt by feeling so left out or should I just grieve for her my own way and stay away?
How can I go about asking my mother in law to call before she comes over?
She comes over constanly 3 times a week and she also shows up on the weekend. My husbands family is not use to calling before they show up. I work an odd schedule on swing and have flexibility on my job to take time off. On my days off I don't want to see my mother in law. My husband has tried to ask her to do that but she only did it once then reverted back to just showing up. He doesn't enforce it. How could I look nice and her ger to call.
What are the last things I should do with my dying mother?
Alright! I'm writing this as a guy who has been there and done that. I lost my Mother three years back. Mom was suffering from Thyroid cancer since many years. When she had an operation in 1997, doctors said that She could live hardly for 6 years, but my Mom survived for more than their estimation. To be honest, I didn't know that my Mother was suffering from such a deadly disease. My Dad never let us (me and my brother) know about it. He kept on giving treatments to her without any hesitation. And finally one day (that was the last day of my graduation) I lost my Mom. The pain was horrible. Irreplaceable, dude. People say moving on with life is easy, but no. It's very, very tough. Anyways, with these experiences, I'm going to write what could be done to make your Mother happy at her end days.Death is inevitable. Try to make the last days as memorable as you can. Spend more time with her. Tell her how important She is to you. Grant all the wishes she want to.Try to stay away from the things/incidents that make you guys sad and depressed.Make a reunion of family and the one who missed out all these days.Try to make her meet with whomever she want. Her childhood friends, long distance relatives.Avoid talking to death. If she want to talk about it, then it's okay.Take her to new places. Introduce her to new people, new cultures, new languages. These things make her excited. Atlast, keep Her happy all the time. The best treatment that a person deserves is to be happy as much as he can.God Bless.
My mother is forcing me to go to a gynecologist?
Unless you are having problems or are sexually active, there is no real reason for you to go. Mental health is just, if not more, important than physical health. It isn't right for her to force you into something you see as humiliating, violating, or frightening for no good reason. If you tell the gynecologist you do not want the exam done, they cannot legally force you, even if your mom says you must. I would say you should go to the gynecologist, tell them about your situation, and ask them to speak to your mom with you. If they are reasonable, they will probably take your side. If you do have to go through with it though, for whatever reason, such as your mom being totally unreasonable and trying to force you through threats or whatever else, just keep in mind that you are nothing special to a gynecologist. Their whole job is centered around female reproductive organs, and most of them see many women's genitals every day. To them, you'll just be another patient, and they won't be judging you or really even thinking about you much. Good luck! I'm sorry your mom is so illogical, unreasonable, and apparently unable or unwilling to try to sympathize with you. Parents often are overprotective and paranoid about their child's health to the point of severely damaging their relationship with them, their child's confidence, and their child's ability to deal with things on their own. *EDIT* People shouldn't be so concerned with physical health all the time, if they are having no problems. Just eat right, exercise, and go see a doctor whenever a problem comes up. Just take care of yourself in general. But that does not include going to the doctor for no reason whatsoever. It isn't healthy to stress yourself and other people out over staying healthy, especially since it can damage mental health and your relationships with people, and being happy and having good relationships are some of the most important things in life. Physical health means nothing without those things, as we are our emotions and thoughts, not our bodies.
In Hindu Bengali weddings, why is the groom's mother not allowed to see the wedding ceremony?
Well, the bride’s mother also is not supposed to see the wedding ceremony. There are two kinds of “theories” (by this superstitious logic system) as to why:1) If the mother sees the wedding, it’s supposed to bring about some ill-luck for the bride and groom. So mothers from both sides refrain from seeing the wedding, to bring about good luck (“mongol kamona”). Although the bride’s mother plays the lead role in “welcoming the groom” (“boron”) when he arrives at the venue.The Bride’s mother welcoming the groom; Image Source: Wedding riceAnd that’s about it; henceforth the bride’s mama should get some air away from the mandap (venue) where the wedding is being held.2) According to a Bengali mythological story, Kartik (The Hindu God), who is the son of Durga (Bengali Goddess), was about to leave for his wedding. Then, he saw Durga devouring a meal, as if she hasn’t eaten in days. Kartik saw Durga eating 7 times and was astonished as to why his mommy is acting up like that. So he asked her, “Why are you eating like this?”Durga replied, “I’m eating as much as I can, because once you get married and your wife becomes part of this household, she might not let me eat properly.”(Yeah, some mother-in-law and daughter-in-law soap opera right there)Hearing this, Kartik said, “If such possibility exists, then I wouldn’t even get married”.That is the reason for Kartik remaining unmarried, till this day.So, according to this legend, Durga started it all; the mother of the Bengali groom could relax for the last time before the daughter-in-law arrives, which is why she doesn’t go to the wedding.These days though, some mothers do not believe in any of this bullshit and attend the wedding. But some mothers don’t want to bring in bad luck, so while they could be present at the wedding, they might just not be in the same hall where it’s happening.Of course, all of the above applies only to Hindu Bengali Weddings.
My mother in law has bronchtis and wants to see my baby, I don't think I should let her?
I know you love your mother-in-law but you have to think about your child as well as your health also. At your daughter's age you have to be careful not to expose her to sickness. Just having their first cold is alot to handle. It would be different if you visit her not knowing she was sick and next thing you know your child/you got sick but in this case you are aware that your mother-in-law is sick. It's better to know than not know so since you know, I won't expose her, you or your husband because viral infection are contagious until its gone. Just be honest and tell her how you feel about it. Honesty is the best policy! By you telling her she may or may not be mad. She should understand your doing it for the well being of your child. She has all the time to see your daughter. If you decide to let her see her anyway then make sure she wears a mask and gloves and meet outside (open air) the house because the virus is in her house. If the weather is cold where you live, you can buy a plastic stroller cover ( it has holes) and put over the stroller. To avoid all that hassle, just tell her you would like to have dinner but you want to wait until she's over the bronchitis. Explain to her what can happen if your daughter caught it. Tell her how you feel bad for her having it and she should use this vacation to take care of herself so she be well when she gets back to see your daughter. Be persistant! Also don't fell bad for feeling the way you do. I'm a mother of 4 and I would feel the same way. Hope this is some help.