Suicidal thoughts.....?
I don't even know why I'm writing this here. I really don't. Maybe it's because suicide isn't what i want, it's something that I'm forced upon. Long story short, I'm 20 years old and I've been having suicidal thoughts for the past 5 years, almost on a daily basis. The only reason why I haven't committed suicide is because that's not who I am. I am not a quitter, I never ****** give up, I am extra persistent and will do anything to reach my aim... but maybe this is too much for me to handle. I'm 20 and I feel like I'm still 15. I've been living my life day to day, sometimes minute to minute for the past 5 years. I can't recall anything from my past 5 years, it's just blank. Here's a very vague explanation of my situation: I've been ILL for the past 5 years. I won't get into details of what my illness is but it was grave enough for me to be hospitalized 3 times in one week : I Cannot work or support myself, cannot get a girlfriend, cannot even enjoy going out for a fun occasion, cannot enjoy life in general. I live day to day in my room. I haven't left my room in exactly 10 months (Usually it's only 3-4 months). So basically I'm ill and I'm unable to support myself, we are poor, and my family is neglecting to support me. They see me suffering, they don't believe in me nor support me or cheer me up. I tell my mom I'm thinking of committing suicide, and she forgets the next day... It's just not important to her. Oh and I don't have a green card, whoopty do! I see two options for me.... Commit suicide or throw my life away by doing something stupid as robbing a store and becoming a criminal. I wanna hear some solutions. I'm just really tired of being suicidal almost everyday for 5 years, It's driving me to insanity. I feel like shooting myself
Think of it like the square and rectangle rule. Every square is a rectangle but no rectangle is a square. You can be not suicidal and have these thoughts, and if you are suicidal you Will have those thoughts.The thoughts, scenarios, sometimes impulses, are called suicidal ideation.That doesn't mean you're inherently suicidal. It might be indicative of other things, most commonly depression and anxiety, but again that doesn't make you actually suicidal.You become suicidal when you begin to plan or act on these thoughts. Either way I highly suggest seeking treatment from a trained professional, if untreated too long those thoughts can become all consuming and dangerous.Another thing is that you may just always have those thoughts, in therapy or treatment they can give you the tools you need to manage them.You don't have to handle this alone and there is tried and true treatment to help.
There are two things I can say for certain: One, you are not alone. Two, you are loved. When dealing with suicidal thoughts, it is so easy to believe whatever your mind is telling you, which is mostly negative and untrue. It’s like that ugly, devil on your shoulder voice. Except the difference is that you believe this voice because it’s been in your head for so long. You believe what it says is true. I certainly did. That voice tells you things like no one will ever understand what you are going through. Everyone would just think you were crazy and throw you in a hospital if they knew. No one would want to help you, they would just tell you to get over it. That voice also tells you that no one really cares about you. No one would miss you if you were gone. In fact, people would be better off without you, wouldn’t they? You can’t handle it; you’re too weak, the voice says. It whispers in your ear that you’ll be happier if you let the darkness consume you into oblivion. The pain would go away if you just end it. You know what I have to say to that? Enough is enough! I mean it. That voice has to shut up, in the name of Jesus. That voice has no place in your mind any longer. Your life is precious. Your life is worth every drop of blood Jesus gave for you. You are wholly and dearly loved. You are not alone. No one will be better off without you. You bring so much life to everyone you know. Your presence alone changes the whole course of history just because you exist. You are enough. And you are a conqueror. I pray right now that the spirit of suicide hanging over you would leave and be kept from you so that you may go on living the life you were meant to live, full of purpose and love and hope.
How can I get rid of suicidal thoughts?
I've had them for a long time. Very strongly lately. I just feel like life is too long and I've lost interest. I don't want to live anymore. I'm very depressed, feel very lonely, feel like all I've ever been is a failure and all I can do successfully in life is fail. I just don't want to live anymore. I've been to therapists, I've taken medication for depression, and nothing has worked. I feel like I'm just not meant to be alive. But I'm very devoutly religious (Catholic.) I know it's a mortal sin to commit suicide and I also don't want to disappoint the God whom I love with all my heart, soul, strength, and mind. He has given me so much, how can I be anything but grateful? But I'm not. I just want to die. Is there anyone else out there who has felt this way? How did you get over it? I don't want to sin, I want to be worthy of the life that God has given me. And I want to be with Him for eternity, not in hell. I just want to get through this life as quickly as possible and as holy as possible so I can end this earthly life and be in Heaven forever with the God I love. I would appreciate any advice. Thanks in advance.
Suicidal thoughts??
Alright, I completely understand your problem. It's similar to mine. I seriously despise my parents and I never regret saying that, ever. Anyways, getting to the point... It sounds like you're going through depression in my opinion, and that is most likely the case if you're having suicidal thoughts. I have the same problem and I think mine is stress and parents pressuring me to do well and just not being very understanding. My mother is a pain in the *** and every time i try to talk to her we just get in an argument. Mine got so bad that I actually did go see my school counselor and we have been talking ever since and she sorta helps in a way. She got us all together and I was able to say what I felt, even though she still hasn't really listened... it helped to just vent and get it out there. Suicidal thought are not good, and they can turn into something huge if you're not careful so you really need to get help. Your school counselor won't necessarily notify your parents, mine didn't. It's only if you say you're actually going to do it that they have to report it. So you really should try talking to somebody, how about a friend? My whole point here is that suicidal thoughts are horrible and should be taken seriously before something horrible happens... if you need any help, I"m here and willing to chat with you. My email is elysehewitt88@gmail.com and my AIM is EmoChick152107. I'd be glad to try and help you out. Take care and good luck.
Suicidal thoughts?
My wife too is bi-polar and she suffers from depression also. Though she has some control with medication it is something that she tries to live with rather than succumb to what she sometimes desires. She has bad days as well as good but she has a strong spiritual relationship with God and she knows that their is hope when God will one day take away her suffering. That keeps her going as well as the support she gets from me. My wife does have death thoughts but she rationalizes that these thoughts do fade eventually. Her spirtuality is a big help in keeping her going. Maybe you do not feel the same way but maybe you can find some common ground, things that lift you up when you are feeling down. To be honest there is no cure to how you feel just a way to handle it when you have these bad days. To continue and hope in something when the days are good help you when the days are bad and you can remind yourself of them. Join a help group of people who are like you. As of right now say to yourself, what ever happens I am going to see my doctor first before I do anything. Say "I am going to get help" Find support groups they are a good source of hope and encouragement of understanding.
How to stop suicidal thoughts?
Hey, let me share some thoughts with you my friend. please ponder on this excerpt which i got from www.stoppingpanicattack.com A lot of people telling me how their anxiety makes them feel very cut off or removed from the world around them. This sensation can be distressing as people fear that they will never be able to feel normal again. Stress or Anxiety can often feel like a thick fog has surrounded your mind. Nothing really seems enjoyable as you are always looking out at the world through this haze of anxious thoughts and feelings. This fog steals the joy out of life and can make you feel removed or cut off from the world. When someone is very caught up in anxious thoughts they are top heavy so to speak. The constant mental activity they are engaged in has caused an imbalance where all of their focus is on their mental anxieties. A powerful way to move out of this anxious mental fog is to switch your focus from your head to your heart. By simply making a deliberate shift of attention to your heart you will find the anxious thoughts dissipate more easily and the mental fog starts to gradually clear. What makes your heart happy? What makes you feel good? What good things do you currently have in your life? By getting control of what makes your heart happy and taking attention away from your general mind, you are on your way to calming your forth coming panic or anxiety attack.
How can I stop suicidal thoughts?!?
Don't hurt yourself. God can help you live a better life if you want Him to help you. You can have a personal relationship with God by saying the prayer below. God is our Creator, all-knowing, all-powerful, eternal, holy, love. God loves us and sent us His Son, Jesus Christ, so we can go to heaven if we know and follow Him. Forever means without end -- time on and on without death. Forever is what happens after we die. Either we go to heaven and be with God forever, or we go to hell which is very bad and painful forever. The good people who are saved believers in Jesus Christ go to heaven. The bad people go to hell. We need to know and follow God in this world to get to heaven in the next world. We follow God by loving and obeying Him and loving others for Him. Jesus Christ, God's Son, is our bridge to God. Jesus died on the cross to cancel our sins. We need to accept Jesus into our life as our Lord and Savior forever to receive God's blessing and forgiveness plus go to heaven to be with God forever after we die. This is about being a born-again Christian. Faith in God is a gift from God. You can pray for faith in God. Just speak out and ask God for the faith to believe in Him and to follow Him. Some people find faith in God when they realize the beauty in the world is made by God. Evolution can't explain the world's natural beauty, for example, the parks in the world, animals, flowers, peacocks, sunsets, butterflies, rainbows, etc. After you have your faith on, you can pray a sinner's prayer to be a born-again Christian. This prayer is very important and should be said with a sincere heart and faith in God. This is the prayer: "Dear God, I know that I am a sinner and that Jesus Christ is the sacrifice for our sins. I have done the following sins (state these out) and I pray to discontinue these sins. I pray to receive Jesus Christ into my life as my Lord and Savior forever. In Jesus' name, amen." I'm Lutheran and I like the Baptist churches too. You could try out a Christian church and also see about their weekly Bible study group to learn about God's will for your life. You can pray to God about your daily life.
Calm down. Just think about the good things in your life. Breathe: sit down in a comfortable position and simply become mindful of your breathing, inhale positivity and exhale all things negative. Imagine your body being invaded with lavender light, picture it flowing through your body like a river. I'm not encouraging the consumption of drugs, but if you really need it, then hit up with a joint or something. Don't abuse any drugs, just saying if you really need it then go ahead. Do things that make you happy. Go out into nature and absorb the Suns energy. Most importantly, calm down. Cheers. :)