My "Best friend" slept with my ex, any advice?
okay so before I get started, if you're gonna say "ohh they were both single at the time so they can do what they want." please don't bother commenting. Anyways, so I broke up with my ex about a year and a half ago, and last night out of no where I stumbled across some crazy information. turns out my "best friend" and I mean my besets friend, the only person I trusted with my life, he was somebody I put high on a pedestal. in all of the 15 years ive known him, he's always been the person I always wanted to be like. that being said, I found out he actually hooked up with her and they both had sex about 3 months after we broke up, so naturally I might have been okay with it if he would have asked me, or at the very least told me he was gonna do it. cuz I can't and won't stop him if wants to do it. but seriously? didn't even tell me, and he probably would have never told me if I didn't find out. anyways I need advice, im in so much pain right now because I feel betrayed and I don't want to lose my best friend, especially not like this. but I know our friendship will never be the same now. please help guys.
Why is my ex trying to be friends with me now?
I more so have a question, why does it matter? What are you trying to hear? Wanting to hear? I think the reason why we ponder on such questions is because there’s a bit of desire, expectation or wishful thinking being seeded. I personally don’t feel it matters why an ex is trying to be friends as this can be for many reasons. The question is do you want to be? If not, then don’t bother, you’re not obligated to, it’s your life. If you do want to then just be friends with them? Don’t overanalyze things before anything has started. My ex is trying to be friends and I really don’t waste a second to look into it because I don’t want a friendship and I could careless as to why he wants to be. so I don’t need to find the reason behind it because my life isn’t changing and it’s not affecting me in anyway to be or to not be his friend. He’s irrelevant and I plan to keep it that way. But if you’re asking for another reason then this isn’t the question you’re looking to be answered.
Can a longtime ex who you are trying to be friends with help you move on and then instantiate friendship from there?
If you are recovering from the breakup of a sequential relationship, then perhaps the longtime ex can help you move on, because they know all of your strengths and weaknesses and the healing you are trying to do is not caused by them.However, if you are speaking about healing from a breakup caused by this longtime ex, then, it’s not an ideal situation to place yourself in, because the dynamics between you will have changed and, you open yourself to a very vulnerable position.Either one of you could inadvertently take advantage of the other and if you were not the one to end the relationship, you could read into, or misinterpret your ex’s care for your well-being as someone other than what it is.If you want to maintain a friendship with this ex then it is better for you to seek support from your friends, family, or colleagues, as it is important to be your best, healed, self before engaging again with an ex.
This ex friend of mine keeps backstabbing me..advice?
Stop talking to her. Responding to it or reacting to it (letting it hurt your feelings) will only fuel her need to say negative things. Try saying really nice things about her, she'll wonder what you're up to and concentrate on waiting for you to stab her in the back and stop saying things at all. Kill em with kindness!! (You think I'm kidding, but it works!!!)
My ex wants to stay friends but I still love her. Need advice please?
My ex and I tried multiple times. Ultimately she says that I'm a great guy and that she wishes she could love me but that she can't choose who she falls for and she has never loved me. I on the other hand am crazy about her and we still text quite a bit. I hung out with her last night (she wanted to keep it as only friends) and I couldn't help but talk about us and try to grab her hand and try to convice her to give us another shot. I ended up ruining the night and she got super mad at me and told me to bring her home in which she was silent the entire ride back. I feel like such an idiot. I messed up by being selfish and not respecting her wishes. I apologized and told her I don't think I can hang out with her as a friend for a while because my feelings are still too strong right now. She still hasnt responded and she's now ignoring me. I feel so stupid for ruining what could have been a good night. My self esteem is at an all time low. I feel like she hates me after last night. I realize its never going to work between us if she doesn't love me but I don't want to lose her as both a girlfriend AND a friend. I told her this but she still hasn't responded. I fee so guilty and upset about where we stand right now. What can I do to get her respect again? How can I get her to start talking to me again? Please, I need advice. I'm a wreck right now
How do I deal with an ex who wants to be friends?
If an ex wants to be friends, I consider that a best possible outcome to a bad situation.I’m still friends with most of my exes. I’ve moved away (with my husband) and don’t see them often. Some I haven’t seen in years. But when I do run into them (I see a few at SF conventions occasionally) we’re friendly and hang out for a bit, chatting. If they’re attached, I’m friendly with their wife or girlfriend.There’s this idea in our culture that it’s normal and expected to despise your exes, and for fights to break out, or at best stiff, hateful civility, whenever you meet. That’s not how it has to be, though.Sure, if you had a bad break-up — if they cheated on you, stole from you, abused you, then hate away. But if you just fell out of love, discovered some incompatible traits or beliefs or goals, it’s possible to have a relatively civil break-up and remain friends afterward. i’ve done it several times.If your ex wants to be friends, and you don’t have a good reason to hate them (again, cheating or stealing or abuse, something serious) then consider being friends with them. Another friend is always nice to have, after all.
Is it correct to try to be a friend of an ex-girlfriend?
I think it all depends on the relationship you had with your ex.I personally don’t have an interest in being friends with my exes. That is probably because I’ve made poor decisions in partner selection. It’s also because I tend to get into on again off again relationships. It’s better if I eliminate all contact.That being said I’m working towards becoming friends with my daughter’s father. However, this isn’t by choice. We’re coparenting and it makes the task easier if we can be civil.Were you both friends before the relationship? Perhaps it can work.In my experience I have zero success with it.
My boyfriend wants to be friends with his ex?
Nope, I don't think you can trust him