Married to a functioning alcoholic?
How do you deal with being married to a functioning alcoholic? My moral compass is everywhere with the fact he drinks every evening and gets drunk on Saturday with his friends. We decided instead of randomly getting drunk he could do an every Friday night where he goes there or they come here, no bars. They get drunk have a good time and that's that. But he has to drink every single day between 2-6 beers and I'm just having a hard time with it. He's a good husband seriously, he works everyday provides for us, no physical or mental abuse, he's supportive and is good with our children and even cuts grass on the side to pay for his habit. I know it's wrong and we have argued over his alcohol consumption along with him picking up a smoking habit and snuff to! I worry for his and our families future we want him around a long time but he doesn't care. Am I wrong for picking his drinking apart? We've definitely had our battles with it but it just bothers me so much and now he sticks to the plan mostly besides having up to 6 beers in the evenings I just hate it around myself and our children.
My father is a functional alcoholic; how do I talk to him about his drinking problem?
Your father, like other addicts, has developed habits and ways of thinking that enable him to rationalize his drinking. To stop and change, he needs a lot of support and help from professionals and others.Depending on how much he drinks, it’s possible stopping drinking will cause seizures and other health problems. Medical professionals may need to be involved as he stops drinking and goes through detoxification.Here’s a link to an article that gives a good overview on steps to take to get your father to realize he’s an alcoholic and to get treatment: Staging an Intervention for an Alcoholic .You can contact local professionals to find out about the next step: treatment programs for your father.Another route to take is Alcoholics Anonymous. It’s free and most likely will be part of your father’s treatment program.Addicts become very single-minded and selfish about ensuring their drug of choice is always available. Their loved ones are often hurt, sad, and deeply angry.Without realizing it, in order to live with or be around the addict, and just to keep their lives on a more even keel, people can become co-dependent. Some of their behaviors, while meant to be helpful, actually enable the addiction to continue, as this article explains: 7 Signs that You’re Enabling an Addict | Foundations Recovery Network.Regardless of whether your father enters treatment or is able to stop drinking, it’s helpful for all his family members to learn more about alcoholism and to heal. Al-Anon, a 12-step program for people affected by an addict’s behavior, is free and helps people work through their own issues.If you can get your father into treatment, there will also be family days when you can attend classes on addiction.Best of luck to you and your father.
How can I cope with a high-functioning alcoholic?
Not sure what you mean by high-functioning alcoholic.Some people define alcoholic as someone who drinks a lot. Others define it as one who is chemically/socially dependent on it.There are a lot of people who can drink a lot and not be addicted.High-functioning seems to imply that they manage their drinking well. I don't know if that's the case, but that's what the wording seems to suggest.In many ways, addiction is really a symptom. The person is self medicating to avoid dealing with a problem. If they are truly alcoholic, it's up to them to solve the personal problems that trigger the urge to drink. AA has a 90% failure rate--its a support group, but it doesn't address fixing the underlying causes.I had to listen to a ridiculous substance abuse/addiction class where the lecturer defined addiction as "if you lose control even once, you're gonna die--whether it be drinking, drugs, *masturbation, coffee, shopping."If the drinking is causing a problem, help them see the problem. If it's not causing a problem you're gonna have a hard time convincing them to stop drinking.
My husband is a "functioning" alcoholic. He drinks nightly. Passes out almost every Sat. night. We have 3 kids
I was in a similar situation years ago, my husband was a "functioning alcoholic" as well. He was fine during the work day and when we went out as a family but in the evening and on his days off he would get so drunk that he would eventually pass out. I hated it and I felt so alone because I was embarrased to tell my family and friends and my son was only 2 years old at the time. Eventually I threatened to leave him and he got help and now things are so different and its wonderful, but I understand what your talking about when you say you wont be the one to leave because Ive been there and I know that you love him and want to be there for him. The one thing that helped me so much was a support group for women who live with alcoholics. I found one online in my area and also my local hospital had one as well. It is for women who are going through the same exact thing you are and it kept me sane through the tough times and these women were at one point the only thing that made me laugh and feel good ( besides my son!) You sound like you are doing all you can for your children so please make sure you take care of yourself too. God bless you and good luck.
HOW MUCH DOES A FUNCTIONING WHISKEY ALCOHOLIC DRINK UNTIL CIRRHOSIS?
hey,It is different for everyone,myself,whisky beer drinker for 30 + years,but I was a binge drinker,now sober 5 years,stopped at age 45,so far as I can tell,no problems,I hope I dont have problems later on,at the end of my drinking I drank on antibuse,and thought I was going to die,also could feel a numbing in my forehead,the start of a wet brain,now 5 years later that has finally gone away,alcohol has f---ed up my life since junior high,but now,I really enjoy life.I really hate to hear about people who die from alcohol,It took a near death for me to sober up,some people are functioning alcoholics,and can hold a job and a family,myself,Icould not hold a job,and yes there were times I got the shakes.bottom line is people have to hit there bottom to sober up,and most important is,they really have to want it more than anything,good luck.