What Did U Think About Hot Tub Time Machine Did U Think It Was Funny

You are in a war. You have a machine gun that can hypothetically shoot any kind of ammunition. The last thing you googled is your ammo. How screwed are you?

Well, then.Not only will I probably not survive this war (as is the case with many other answerers), but I will die knowing that I have done something so unethical and cruel that there is a chance my name will be synonymous with mud post-mortem.It’s not my fault! I was told I bore a likeness to her, and I had to see for myself!How the hell do you shoot an infinite number of little girls from a machine gun?!Not only is it child-abuse, but also completely impractical!I’ve no idea what her exact measurements are, but something tells me I cannot fit one Eloise into a machine gun, much less an infinite amount.Even if I could, can you imagine how stupid I would look on the battlefield?- - - - - - - - -I’ll be sitting in the brambles, probably pretending I’m Lyudmila Pavlichenko to calm myself down in this high-stress zone, ready to snipe any threat that comes within my line of vision. I’ll wait and wait until I’ve half convinced myself I really am Pavlichenko. Minutes go by. Hours. Days, for all I know—I’m not patient, at all to be honest.Then, lo-and-behold: An enemy coming right for me!Having been kicked back from the world of my writing fantasies, I’ll shake my arms awake, grit my teeth, and prepare to aim. It’s just a matter of pinpointing the enemy’s vital spots using my sniper-scope, now. Once this is done to near perfection, the final step is to wait for them to get close enough to ensure my shot will count.My hands will be shaking, mostly because I’m always very antsy. Any moment now… Any moment… Just keep—Now!I’ll clamp down hard on my lip and pull the trigger, flinching at the noise.The enemy will hear the shot as well, just a millisecond too late to save their life.Their eyes will widen for a brief moment—Their bodies will tense…And I’ll watch as they fall to the ground……alive, stunned, and overall pissed.They’ll look at the poor little girl who is now trembling on top of them. They’ll watch the tears cascade down her cheek as she tries to fix her little red bow. They may even recognize her, either from the original books or elsewhere.And they’ll shout to the sky, “WHAT THE ACTUAL—”Then some gun-enthusiast Quoran who was lucky enough to have last googled actual gun ammo will promptly finish the job I epically failed to do myself.And I’ll lay in the brambles as I lightly bang the butt piece of my gun against my forehead, cursing myself for believing that I resembled a fictional book character. Which, in this case, I barely do.Pavlichenko indeed, Burr.

What's the one thing you can't believe happened on vacation?

What appeared to be a drowning woman, I’m a trained rescue swimmer, so I jumped into the surf and dragged her out. She was wearing a skimpy bikini and her body was the hottest thing I’d ever seen. I was about to give her mouth-to-mouth when she choked-up water and coughed-out the rest.She said “I know you’re disappointed you didn’t get mouth to mouth, but for saving my life I’ll give you the ride of your life.”Yikes.I walked her (Angela) back to her villa and we hopped into the hot tub there. She straddled me and kissed/caressed me into arousal. We didn’t do it there, but we did it later in her villa. And she expressed her gratitude in a highly energetic manner.The next day I met up with some mates and one asked, “How’d it go with Angela?” Another mate slapped him on the shoulder as if he’d revealed a secret. I said “Okay, gents, what’s going on?” They said “nothing” - and I said “Spill it-”One confessed that this girl Angela wanted to meet me and didn’t know how, so she talked to my mates and found out a little about me, and that I used to be in a rescue unit, so she cooked up this plan to meet me. It was all a setup.I went by Angela’s villa the next evening and she met me at the door draped in sheer pool cover-up and a bikini underneath it. She pulled me inside and into a long kiss. “Miss me already?” she said.I didn’t say anything about what my mates had said. Our evening was a little slower this time. We made love, but took our time with each other. I was completely infatuated with her and she couldn’t seem to get enough of me.She lived over an hour away from me, but we agreed to keep in touch and see each other. This lasted a year before I decided to move closer. A year after that we moved-in together, another year we got married. That was twelve years ago and we have two great kids, and are more in love than ever.And never once have we discussed how she setup our meeting. She always tells it in terms of “he rescued me, and I fell in love with my knight” - If she wants to keep the “tale” alive, I’m willing to let her. I do however, get the feeling she knows about me knowing, but that we don’t discuss it - frankly makes me even hotter for her.

What is the most useless job you can think of?

This is the first image that rang my mind’s doorbell when I saw the words “Useless Job” together.The job role in CID of Dinesh Phadnis a.k.a. “Fredericks” a.k.a. “Freddie”, without an iota of doubt, can be considered as one of the the most useless and thankless jobs there has ever been.It’s been almost 2 decades since the inception of CID ( F.Y.I the most ridiculous detective series that has ever been and that will ever be ) and Fredericks has acted in the most number of episodes (1347 episodes to be precise) from the entire cast. Not even ACP Pradyuman could beat this guy.Freddie’s role in CID, for a major part of the series, has been demeaning and disgraceful. With initially just a one line dialogue for the first 1000 episodes along with a statue-like strict pose, and still not willing to leave the show, the writers decided to increase his role in the episodes being aired now and have given him two line dialogues.He also tries to do comedy, while solving cases, which actually makes one laugh. It’s not the comedy though, but the attempt of being comical, which makes the viewer’s funny bone tickle.I hope that his role in CID keeps getting more and more focus in the years ( decades ) to come and am quite certain of the fact that Freddie will take over Pradyuman’s role one day in the CID team.All Hail Freddie !!!