What do you think of this short prologue?
The second paragraph begins rather abruptly, and it feels rather aimless. It may be just me but 'Mike the cabbie' sounds a bit weak, you could tweak it a bit. Establish some link between the two paragraphs, did he fall unconscious or is it some other day?The third and final paragraph are very engaging, I already want to know what is causing Jack to have near suicidal tendencies, who is the girl he thinks about? You've managed to get the reader hooked, which is a big deal. The disjointed beginning won't necessarily cost you, but if it is here, there's a definite chance it'll be ahead too.Built a great start, but I had to reread it to get it settled, if you could nail it in the first read, you've got your reader.
What do you think of this scene in my novel?
Quite nicely wrote. The sex scene needs a bit of work however. Things like "My penis stiffened." Since it is written from mainly first person view. Perhaps something more like "I stiffened," "My body stiffened." Since it's pretty obvious what part of the body stiffened. Make it more natural and not just pornographic or movie-like. And it did seem a bit sudden, but that is your view as the author to pinpoint this i suppose. The overall writing style is quite easy to read also. The sentences are not tedious and fluidly branch most of the time. "She seemed reluctant, but she did not push away." Create a good atmosphere in the scenario. Since i have only read this bit i cannot rate the whole thing exactly. Therefore, for the scene alone it is good. Needs a little work but definitively not broken in any way. And if it is being published, you may suffer in ratings for these things. But depends on the audience you wish to attract. You have talent, dont waste it :) Feel free to email me @ dillondrain@hotmail.com
What do you think of this short excerpt from my novel (critistism wanted)?
You didn't tell me you're writing a book! Not that I'd expect you to, but oh my god xD I like this excerpt a lot, though it's hard to judge a book by such a small portion of writing. I agree with the other user who said to remove Mr. Grady's dialogue, it just seemed to lessen the impact of what's going on. What's the book about?
My first novel is 60,000 words. Is it too short?
Short novels - novellas - often range from 40000 to 60000 words, so you are in the perfect range for that. However, all this changes for novels when you take into account the genre of the novel. For any novel, 80000 words is the general guideline.Science fiction and fantasy novels are often notoriously lengthy due to the scale of the story being told - the number of characters, the intricate locations, the complex politics running the story in the background. As such, anything from 90000 to 125000 is decent for a fantasy story. However, first time novels are often slightly shorter, as to get a foothold in the market.Some novels are infamously heavy word-wise - historicals such as War and Peace are huge tomes of writing, some of which is unneeded. In fact, War and Peace is 587287 words long, and several hundred pages are tied to part two of the epilogue, which is an essay on history that has no standing on the story whatsoever.Atlas Shrugged, a cult classic written by Ayn Rand, is 561996 words long. George Eliot’s Middlemarch is 316059 words long. Erich Maria Remarque wrote a short book known as All Quiet on the Western Front - this is only 61922 words, but is still known as one of the classics.Further Reading:How Long Should a Book Be? -- Word Count For Books ExplainedGreat Novels and Word Count
Writing a fast paced sword fighting scene for a novel?
Ive been mulling a novel idea for a while now, but i dont know how to go about writing a fastpaced sword fighting scene. Any tips or secrets that ud like to share about writing something like this would be greatly appreciated. Thanks a million in Advance.
I need ideas for a close reading paper on a short scene of As I Lay Dying? ?
I have not read this book, but here are a few sites I found that may be of some help to you for your work with it. http://www.sparknotes.com/lit/asilay/ http://www.cliffsnotes.com/WileyCDA/LitNote/id-22.html http://www.mcsr.olemiss.edu/~egjbp/faulkner/n-aild.html http://www.gradesaver.com/classicnotes/titles/dying/about.html
How should I start writing a gunfight scene for my short story?
Start by writing it.Really, I hope that you've got an outline ready, or at least a general idea for a sequence of events, as well as knowing who is going to be involved in it.If you haven't got that yet, then here are some general pieces of advice.What happens during a gunfight depends on how much of an amateur or a professional the people involved in it are. Amateurs are, generally speaking, people who have not handled guns much in their lives at all and have absolutely no clue how to use them. Apart from the rare individual who has some shreds of common sense, most people who pick up a gun with no prior experience will have no idea how to effectively aim them, and will definitely not know how to handle the gun's recoil. To many amateurs, the mere concept of taking cover before firing does not even occur to them.Professionals, on the other hand, are trained and know what they are doing. Most habits that professional/trained gun users have are the ones that are regularly drilled into policemen and soldiers - taking cover the moment the shooting starts, acquiring a target and aiming at it instead of shooting wildly in its general direction, and accurately firing from a proper stance instead of spraying bullets from the hip.If most participants in the gunfight are amateurs, it's going to end messily for everyone. If one participant is an amateur and one is a professional, it's going to end messily for only one of them, and it doesn't take a genius to figure out which one.If most participants in a gunfight are professionals however, then it all boils down to which gunman is more skilled, has quicker reflexes, or is able to think more quickly on his feet to pull off sneaky tricks like misdirection and flanking maneuvers.
What do you imagine when you are working on your poem/short story/novel?
I've seen a lot of TV and films and sometimes I consider what characters would say in certain scenes. This helps me explore the characters and by using their common phrases I can create a brand new scene that makes me appreciate the way the actors and actresses develop their portrayals of what's required for the stories. With my own poetry, I can use this technique to develop a story and then use that in the creation of a new poem. Sometimes I can imitate the accents of others and use the phrases within the poems.This can be done when writing about children for children and humour played a big part in some poems I wrote.When dealing with poems about animals eg my Stephen Gayford wildlife poems on the poemhunter website, I follow the initial scene in the Stephen Gayford picture and take the story along as I see the story unfold before me. The gift of imagination will help me explore what I see happening eg a tiger on the prowl or a lion cub playing with other cubs or a dolphin leaping out of the water enjoying life to the full.The same visual techniques apply when writing about visits to Heaven or meeting angels. Beyond such thoughts, there are the dreams we dream which can be described on paper or via the computer and then shared online. We may embellish the basics using our decision to create some modern day parable, but the reader hasn't a clue what we have dreamed and just appreciates the poetry itself.Sometimes rhyming is easier, as it follows a standard 8, 6, 8, 6 syllables style. Even so, there are times when the descriptive text style creates a better presentation. Creating rhymes sometimes switches us from one rhyme that didn't work well to trying another that does, even if not as eloquent as others may enjoy. So we may prefer to compromise and get a finished poem instead. Good poemhunter readers' feedback is nice as it helps us to click another poet's username and read their poems, too. From what they wrote, we may get an alternative idea for new poetry. So my poetry isn't always based on my original ideas, but is a collection of memories that I delve into then to follow something new...It's the following of what our imagination presents to us that we can easily create something that will bless us and others. Easily? Yes, sometimes...Denis MartindaleThat's a link to my poems. Use search for a keyword eg God, Jesus, Holy Spirit, Heaven, angels etc or Stephen Gayford, lion, tiger etc...
What is the best way to write a chase scene for a story?
I am writing a chase scene for my story. The killer is after the 2 friends (the main characters.) This is obviously an important part of the story and I want it to be intense and really catch the reader's interest. It takes place in a European country at night and I want it to be filled with a few good scenes. It has to take place within two hours or so! I'm unsure of how to write it. Should I be really descriptive or have my sentences short? How many scenes for such a short time frame would be appropriate? Any ideas on what kinds of scenes I should have? Thanks in advance and please no rude answers.