What should I do about my girlfriend's self harm?
First of all. don't ask her via a phone or text, if you were to ask her, upfront would be best, so you know what she'll be doing while your asking her. But also help self-harming people is hard, she seems happy to you all the time, because she found a method that allows her to express her emotions, i think she needs more trust in you, although you've only dated for 2 weeks, the more she trusts you, the more she'll be open to how she really feels, self-harming people just need support, they need to see that there are people out there would can help them. Speak out your concern, but don't pressure her if she denies it while talking about her cuts (if you do) that can lead to bad things.
How to break up with a self harming girlfriend?
My girlfriend is 15. We tend to get in arguments a lot because she treats me badly. Well she's affecting my depression even more, and I found out she hurts herself a lot because of me. I need to break up with her for hers and my health. I know she will probably hurt herself after we do. How do you think I should break up with her, and do you think I should tell her guardians what she may do when we break up?
Boyfriend found out about my self harming?
this is a repost but really need some help? my boyfriend found out that i'm self harming as he found the razer in my draw and then saw the cuts up my arms, he didn't tell me he had found the razer till the other night when he rang me and i told him that i was sorry and then he asked why and all i could do was cry because i couldn't deal with it all he then hung up and text me well it can't be that important if you wont say why and then i rang him and he was crying saying is it my fault our unhappy and all i could say is no i couldn't even explain because it hurts to talk about it. how can i talk to him about? and try make him understand that its the only way i can deal with life right now? and also how can i bring it all up and deal with it without making myself want to self harm? i hate the fact i'm hurting him because of it but please don't say just stop because i can't i've tried
Ive found out that my girlfriend self harms :/ what should i do?
i have recently discovered that a girl i have been seeing for the past couple of weeks self harms on a regular basis. i am quite shocked and also very put out. what should i do? i like the girl, but i dont want to become wrapped up in her issues. help please :)
How can I help my friend who's self-harming?
Self-harm is a symptom that can take many forms. But what to do depends on the situation. First, a caveat: You are a friend, not a caretaker. Being supportive and helpful is part of friendship, but try to keep in mind that you cannot bear the responsibility for the person alone. Being friends with someone who’s self-destructive can be exhausting, and you may need support yourself. Try to stay away from a downward spiral of increasing feelings of responsibility and guilt coupled with isolation. I’ve been there, on both sides, and it’s bad for everyone.But, in terms of what you can do, there’s the long-term and the short-term. Long-term, try to find out why they self-harm (e.g. depression? anxiety?) and try to get them to a professional. And just, in general, be a *friend*. If it’s depression, try to engage them in stuff, try to get them to take a walk with you and so on. Depression is a downward spiral itself and sometimes you need a bit of a push in the right direction from a friend.Self-harm is often a coping mechanism that frequently also turns into a kind of psychological addiction, Short-term, it depends on them. Talk to them about it sometime when they’re in (relatively) good condition.If they *want* to self-harm and don’t want to stop doing it, there’s not really much you can do about the symptom itself. Forcing the issue too much might risk harming your relationship without aiding the person at all.If they want to stop self-harming, but can’t do it alone, help them out in making the self-harm itself harder. If they cut themselves, get rid of their razor blades. If they starve themselves, be a bother about them eating. And so on.
How do I hide self harm from my boyfriend?
As much as anyone would hide their cuts from friends, family or even loved ones, I don't think that hiding the cuts from your boyfriend would be a good idea. There are a lot of scenarios that are likely to happen if he ever found out himself. Just expect that there would be a lot of drama.As someone who (still) self harms, I know the feeling of being embarrassed or ashamed of them, and that anxiety pools at the bottom of your stomach once the time to tell them comes. He's your boyfriend remember? You two probably would not have ended up together if you didn’t know each other like the back of your hand. If he really is your boyfriend, he would take time to understand you, be compassionate, and would support you. Usually, they would ask you to not do it again, especially if the cuts recent. Be honest with them. Don't say that you never will, because at one point, life would suddenly hit you with a rock and you’d stumble and fall. You'd do it again, because sometimes, people self harm because it's their coping mechanism.But just to answer your question, I suggest that you wear long - sleeved clothing, or pants, depending on where you cut. Be cautious about the way you turn your arm, especially when you pick something up, or during meals. Sometimes, there would be those moments you can't wear long sleeved clothing because of some special occasion or celebration with him, try to sit beside him in a way that the cuts are facing away from him. (unless you cut on both sides of your arm)Tell him that there's this new fashion trend going on In the internet that says wearing a lot of bracelets are cool. Wear watches with wide straps, or, if you cut on your legs, wear leg warmers or long knee socks.But, most of all, if you want to ease the tension and prevent the relationship from crumbling, I suggest you talk to him about it. There’s no need to prepare something for him, like a dramatic speech. To lessen the blow, tell him that you need help and would need his support because your not okay. Then, tell him you cut and show him. Its normal if start crying or screaming, or express any negative emotion, because if they really care about you, this would highly concern them. So, I wish you good luck and I hope you consider my advice!-Flide
Boyfriend found out I self harm ?
It's hard because it seems likely that she does not understand your mental disorder, neither do, as am seeing, the other people answering the question. The best thing that you can do is try to work it out by talking to him about it. If that doesn't work, it seems plausible that you may need to mind emotional support, in form of a significant other, in other places. Talk to him.
Boyfriend found out that i self harm, what do i do?
I am not a doctor or indeed anything to do with the medical profession at all, but self harming sadly has been around for a long long time, and just like anorexia its a deep rooted mental thing that causes people to do it, so yes there is always a reason or excuse whey people do it. Unlike anorexia who don't see themselves for being so slim, on the other hand those who harm themselves do know what they are doing, but still are compelled and like you say become addicted to it. The first port of call for help is your own doctor, he will find a good therapist for you so that they can go down to find the root cause of why you do it. When that problem is sorted then you will be well on the way to healing yourself. I truly do have deep sympathy for you, anything that troubles the mind, especially when we don't know what it is, is truly a form of severe mentally suffering, and I wish that on nobody. You feel shame and would be humiliated were others to find out, and I suggest that you keep reminding yourself of that, just so that it gives you the strength and courage you need to seek therapy. Keep looking back on when life was good, keep telling yourself you will have that back one day again. Never stop trying to help yourself, and then let others help you too sweetheart.
How do you tell your boyfriend that you self-harm? I’ve been with him for almost a year, and I don’t know how I should tell him.
I would be very careful about sharing this info. What’s your motive for telling him? Are you looking for attention or someone to help you stop abusing yourself? There is a very high probability he already knows. Your issue will likely become the center of your relationship. He won’t understand no matter how many times you explain or maybe he will but he won’t understand why you can’t just stop. If your aware your doing harm then just stop , I know it’s not that easy. I was once bulimic for a six year period of time. I started throwing up after my boyfriend took his own life when I was 17 years old. I didn’t purge to control my weight I purged to punish myself and to try to gain control of my life that was spinning out of control. A few years after his death I started a relationship with another young man at some point I told him about my bulimia or he figured it out somehow not really sure how that went down but he knew and he did not like it or feel empathetic towards my sickness at all. I remember one of the last straws with him was when he spent $50 on dinner and then caught me puking it up over the fence in my back yard. To say he was pissed would be an understatement. I stopped shortly after not for him I found another form of self abuse called cocaine. That’s the problem with self abuse is it just changes form if you don’t get professional help. My suggestion is instead of telling your boyfriend get professional help . Once that secret is out of the bag you can’t take it back. If you know your true intentions of sharing this very personal information with him and your sure this will benefit your relationship then go for it if not let us know how it goes down.