My daughter got caught doing this?
hey OK im only 20 but i`ve been thru all of this and i have pretty calm and chill parents so a couple of tips 1 lecturing her about how smoking kills and and weed gets you addicted wont help we just look past that 2 being to easy on her and just play the supportive one is going to let her think that what she did was ok 3 its really mostly group pressure (not in the usual way where they say do it or we wont be friends ) but if everyone does it she fells most likely left out 4 it is to 90 % the kids she hangs out with im sure she didnt buy the booz or the weed so check her friends who are old enough (she is 16 but there will be guys over 18 some even over 21 or maby some with a fake id ) its mostly a balancing act betweet teaching with a strong hand and support unfortunately there is no perfect guideline for what to do in those kind of situations but extream masurments mostly wont help so bottom line is try to guide her less then just punish her till the max i hope i could help good luck and dont worry that phase is gonne be over if you just have the right amount of trust and guidance
What do i tell my daughter who got caught with drugs at school?
i know what shes iis going through. first of all, dont go all crazy opn her. just becuase you scream at her,and punish her wont make her stop trying drugs or make her any happier. trust me. i know from personal experience. right now, just have a talk to her. thats what she really needs, she needs a a change and to open up to you.she lacks your confidence and needs you to not go crazy when she tells you her side of the story and her issues etc. tell her you wanna talk to her, friend to friend, everything that she tells you is between you guys and you wont hold it against her (and DO NOTT break your promise) she will open up to you and talk to you, alot of things will get you angry but dont start going crazy, jsut ask her calmly and quietly why? and what? and where? etc. tell her you wil have to punish her for the drugs in school and stuff that you knew about before she told you anything. tell her the basic, its not worth it. sometimes there really is no way of having your kid stop doing drugs.she wills top when she is ready. one day shes gonna realize she needs to get her life together and stuff. i used to smoked weed daily as a girl of 13 yrs old up to 17. i got cuaght. id idnt really care. my mom did talk to me and help me. we gained lots of confindence together. id dint stop becuse of her though,but she did reallllyy help. i stopedd when i realized myself what i am doing is wrong and i need to striaghtn up. my mom let me tell her when i did smoke and she wouldnt get angry or punish me becuase we had trust.
Should I tell my husband that my step daughter was caught having sex?
OY! I'm glad I'm not in your shoes. I don't know if you should tell your husband or not. In some ways, I think you probably should, because if he finds out his daughter has been having sex and that you knew all along, he could be just as angry with you, and that wedge could cause a possible problem in your own marriage. While I think you'd be making a good decision to tell your husband, going to your in-laws or passing the responsibility of telling your husband off to your friend seem like not-so-great decisions. Regardless, talk to your stepdaughter about the jailbait she's dating, and talk to her about the importance of safe sex. If you don't feel like you can do that, then absolutely, you should tell your husband so he can talk to her about it. That the mother made such a decisive move after seeing her under-age son having sex with your stepdaughter makes me think she might act on the statutory rape issue if she knows it continues.
What should I do if a teacher caught my 13-year-old daughter cheating on a test?
Well, I’d do the following:Talk to her. Why did she cheat? Presumably, by 13, she knows to not cheat on tests, so find out why she did it. Did she not study? Is she having problems understanding the material and is therefore at risk of failing the class? Does she have too many activities on her plate, and she literally has no time to study because she’s running from activity to activity?After talking to her, figure out what changes need to happen in order for her to be able to be prepared for the next test. Get a tutor. Restrict computer/TV time and increase study time. Monitor her homework closely to make sure she is doing it herself and is doing all of it.Take a look at her extracurricular activities she’s involved in. Does she HAVE to do dance, piano, cheer, play soccer and run a soup kitchen? Trim it down to only those activities she really wants to do. Kids nowadays seem to have so much more stuff that they do than when I was a kid-I wasn’t expected to run from activity to activity like kids nowadays appear to do.Tell her if she is ever having problems in class, to communicate that to you instead of cheating, and reinforce the lesson that cheating is not only dishonest, it doesn’t help her at all, since she is learning nothing. Tests are meant to gauge her understanding of the material, and if she cannot perform, then she needs to get help.Ground her for a week to reinforce the lesson that cheating is not acceptable behavior. Except for school and other vital activities, she will come straight home and TV/playtime on the computer will be restricted. She needs to learn that cheating is not a benign activity now-if she goes to college, depending on the school, cheating could put an end to her college career and screw up her life plans. Colleges do expel people who are caught cheating. And of course when she starts working, she will have to figure out how to get things done without cheating her way though a career-people can lose their jobs/careers if they get caught, and the worst kind of cheating can put you in jail. Cheating is not a life hack, it’s serious business with serious consequences. Life will catch up with a cheater, and she needs to learn that lesson.
When should I tell my daughter about her dad?
My daughter won't stop asking me about her dad. I always tell her he is busy and will be home soon and that he can't wait to see her. My daughter has never met her dad and I feel bad for lying. Her dad doesn't want to see her. When I was young I was always a shy timid girl (and still am) and I let people push me about and never stood up for myself. My mom and dad never cared about me and were so happy when I left home at 16. At 16 I got a job in a cafe and lived in a flat and had zero qualifications. When I was 19 I had enough money to buy a proper house so I moved and I got a job in a pub. I was happy for a while and had loads of great friends (something I had not had a lot of when I was younger). But when I was 21 some new neighbours moved in next door. A married couple who were 28 at the time and had been married for 4 years. I was friendly with them both. One day my neighbour had a party and I went. His wife was out and we all got a bit drunk. My neighbour kissed him and I kissed him back. The next day he explained he was drunk but we ended up kissing again and had sex. We then slept together for a year. His wife one day caught us and she was so angry. I was so sorry. I was a mistake. A few weeks later I found out I was pregant I told my neighbour he was angry and so was his wife and his wife beat me so badly and I cried. I then moved houses again. I soon gave birth to a little girl and I love her so much :) Now she won't stop asking about her daddy. When should I tell her? She is 10 btw. Too young to know. Yes I know Im a **** but please give me some advice. If you are just going to insult me don't even bother. HELP!
My daughter got caught cheating, what should I do?
This is not a punishment situation but a parenting situation. Your daughter already dealt with this herself. She was tempted to cheat for peer acceptance, started, then when her conscience got a hold of her, she reconsidered and stopped. Everything you have taught her just proved itself to be correct. Absolutely do NOT "cancel Christmas". If you go overboard on this, you are teaching her that it doesn no good at all to correct your mistakes. She is paying the appropriate price with the school punishment. they have a policy and she is being dealt with according to that. As her parents, you and Dad need to sit down and tell her" We are disappointed that you were tempted to cheat, but we can understand why you were tempted. It is important to us that you are honest, and that is why we are glad you decided not to cheat. You did break the rules, so we think the school punishment is fair and we support that. Here at home it may take a little while before we completely trust you, so we will be watching you a little closer." Now assuming she follows the rules from now on, LET IT GO. Nobody needs to have their mistakes held over their head forever. Your job is to teach her to make good decisions and pay the price when she doesn't. It sounds like that has already happened. There is no point in being punitive.
I caught my daughter (please answer)?
My daughter like to walk a lot.She takes her ipod and shell walk around the complex for maybe 30 -45 min usually every day.Sometimes i will go to publix or something and will see her walking around while im driving down.She seams to be more of a quiet down kid.Weve talked about that,she doesnt smile to much,well atleast with me.Anyways it was 8:30 at night and she had been walking for 1 hour and a half.I decided to go do some spying,she never walked this much before.I drove around and passing a bushy area i heard faint gigling,i stopped the car and walked around this corner,were this was this field,not to big.Yes thisis in my complex (in the back) and she was on the floor with this boy that looked 16.He was laying down and she was like sitting on top of him put leaning over in a way,so her feet were by his.Like laying on him but with her hands on the ground holding her wait and he had his hands around her waist.I was by the bushes listening in on it(only 8 feet away or so). And they seamed very cute,kinda like kittens.They would get quiet and stare into eachother eyes then he would say "rawr" after 15 seconds.They said stuff like "i luff you" and he kept saying "your beautiful" she would call him "hot" and stuff like that.They did not kiss on the lips,but he kissed her neck a couple times.They both kissed eachothers cheek.He went in like he was gonna kiss her lips but then he turned her head for the cheek.I called her cellphone and told her "where are you",she replied saying that she was walking.I asked her to come on home that its to late.She hung up,i was still by the bushes,my car was also parked in a bush area that she cant see.She stood up and said "oh sh*t my mom is gonna kick my a**" and then he hugged her kissed her on the forhead then she went running home.She went in one direction i drove off in another.She didnt see me,she got home first then i arrived saying i came from the grocery store and her sister called and said she was gone.Sorry its so long.But what should i do about this?Is this normal?She seamed so happy,i mean she was lying,should i band her from going outside?Advice plz!
I caught my 15 y. o. daughter kissing another girl, please help?
As a parent, you did the right thing to end it where it was. She is in a poluted world, an evil, nasty place that condones and lifts up such behavior. This is a very touchy situation, and when she turns from Jesus, there is very little that can be done. I would take her to counseling. She'll balk, she'll scream, she'll be very mad, but it's worth it. Homosexiulaity is often (but not always) triggered by some kind of sexual abuse she may have experienced, or is currently experiencing. I suggest not to punish her. I know, that sounds like a horrible idea, but hear me out. What she needs in you is a friend. She has clearly turned away from men and is seeking romantic and comforting companionship with females. Girls normally look for someone to make her feel protected. If you show yourself as someone she can lean on and rely on, even when she's at her worst, she will turn towards you and respect more what you have to say. It is a long and difficult process, and she'll think she hates you for the majority of the time, but keep being open and always pray for her. I'm afraid I have never raised a teenager, but I AM one, and I can see her side more easily than you may. Feeling humiliated for having been caught, she's going to take it out on you. SInce you do not agree with it, she's going to take it out on you. Because you are readily available, she is going to take it out on you. Please do not take it personally. She may mean it personally, but that is the whilrwind in which she has found herself speaking for her. She'll try to sneak out at night. SHe'll make out in school. But what you CAN do is make sure the calls/texts you wherever she goes, and set an alarm on the car, and try to be aware of any of her friends vehicles in the middle of the night. Put bells on her window or her door, anything. The only way to fix what is broken is to find the one who created it. Jesus created her to be a lovely, happy girl. She became cracked by sin and her own choices, but storm the gates of heaven on her behalf, and I too will be traying for you both.
Should I tell my daughter that her father is not her real father?
The answer to this depends on the situation. 1) Are you the biological father? If so:2) How do you still know and have contact with your daughter? 3) Are the adopted parents telling her about it? 4) Do you have a good relationship with the adopted parents? 5) Can you all broach it together? 6) How old is she?Depending on your answer to 2; if you have legal visitation, then she will eventually want to know why. If you don’t, you probably shouldn’t be seeking out contact with her, and definitely shouldn’t be interfering with her family situation. Based on your answer to 3) You should definitely take your lead from the adoptive parents, and if they haven’t told her then hurting that bond is not the way to go. Based on 4) If you have a good or even working relationship with the parents, talk it over with them and figure out a plan to present this. 6) Obviously your course will be different for a 3-year old than a 23-year-old, but the principles remain. I am generally all for telling children the truth about their adoption, but the truth is that if you tell her without the family going along will it, you will harm your daughter. You will harm her ability to form attachments and will cause pain in her life. The pain that her new dad will experience is small compared to the upheaval it will create in her life. Besides, she might not believe you anyway. As a father, biological or adopted, your priority is your daughter’s well being, and sometimes keeping a secret is less harmful even when it sucks.If you are the adopted father, the answer is unequivocally yes. Tell her you’re not her biological father. Tell her as soon as possible, and let her feel what she feels. Let her look for her father if she wishes, let her be sad or angry or confused or all of the above. Support her. Be her dad, even if you didn’t father her.
Would you yell at your 18-year-old daughter if she was depressed for no reason?
A big NO,NEVER!First of all,I don't think I’m ever going to ‘yell’ at my daughter who is teenager if I ever have one. Yelling at children/people just makes them feel humiliated,that's not something I would ever want my children to feel. And she's not even a child,she's an adult!Yelling at people is wrong but yelling at a depressed person is even worse. Why would I shout at my daughter for feeling depressed when it's not her mistake,like,at all? Depression is a mental disorder,it does not importantly need an external reason.Clinical depression is a type of mental disorder that isn't always caused because of any external factors, it is very likely that your daughter (assuming you are the mother) may be suffering from it.When I was young,I used to feel awful and suicidal for no external reason. I used to feel even worse cause people used to either assume that I was doing this for attention or I was just being lazy. I didn't think my feelings were valid,I held myself accountable for it and that made my state even worse! Don't ever make somebody feel accountable for something that they have no control over!I would rather help her,support her,tell her that her feelings are valid and that I will always stand by her side. In case it continues for a long time and I see that she isn't able to cope up with it, I may consider seeking professional help.To all the mothers who yell at their children because they feel depressed for no reason: Would you yell at your child because he/she feels pain in his/her head but you aren't able to see any external factor that could cause it?